Farne, of course, let me know exactly what he thought about my actions. He was yelling, brandishing his fists, and screaming that if the bandits hadn’t gone crazy and turned tail for some unknown reason, I’d be dead as a doornail.I had a pretty good idea why exactly they had gone crazy, but I was in no hurry to confess it to the colonel, and thus, I kept poking at the ground with my toe-cap and making an innocent face. When Farne finally realized that winners couldn’t be judged, he stopped pestering me. They still had to release all the captives, help the wounded, interrogate everyone, get them home, hang the bandits, and sort out the loot.Compared to all that, I was practically sitting on my hands, other than pouring another dose of moonshine into the noble count, affectionately telling him that incorrect wake-up juice led to a bender. I calmed down.Too bad. In five days, a shadow slipped inside my tent. His name was Tyen Claymore, and he was a tutor who had been teaching a baron’
I informed him about our misfortune and the untimely passing of the count.“Oh, and also, you see, honorable mayor, I have a list here. It shows what exactly, how much, from whom... In a word, your part of the plunder. Could you explain this to me?”The mayor couldn’t and tried to jump out of the window and flee. He failed, and also accidentally hit himself against my boot, after which he started to repent actively. And I didn’t disappoint him. Everyone knows that any proper repentance should end with death. Thus, I ordered my men to hang the corrupt mayor on a lamp post right across from the town council, while telling everyone that I knew the same things about them as I did about him.They were to surrender half of their illegal gains to the treasury by the next day, or else. Lamp posts were a rare sight in the town, but there were enough trees for everyone.”And in case you forget about your obligations, you will be escorted by these wonderful people from Sir Farne’s regiment."Yes
It all started when Uncle decided to hold a joust in honor of my return and in Count Torne’s memory. I would have offered him two barrels of moonshine for the latter, but nobody had asked me. Instead, Uncle told us the good news in a rather cringe-worthy tone. “Andre, Alex, there will be a joust in ten days. I hope you won’t disgrace our family’s honor?” “Of course, Father.” In public, Andre played the role of a dutiful son. “As you command, Uncle.” “Come on, boys. Doesn’t it make you happy?” “We’ll be overjoyed,” I said passionately. Both Tommy and Rene reacted the same way to the news about the joust—by swearing like a sailor at my uncle. Fair enough; a joust required a set of armor, a weapon, a horse... Getting them just ten days before a tournament, when half the capital was doing the very same, seemed impossible. Could one participate without that? One could. But judging by Abigail’s warm smile, there was going to
Andre was clearly becoming more and more anxious, and when he tore off his helmet and threw it aside, I knew that it was time to act. Once again, I dodged his blow, and deftly scratched my cousin’s cheek. Blood started flowing, and Andre stopped, in utter disbelief.I sneered.“I hope I haven’t offended you, Cousin?”With these words, I made a bee-line for the exit from the tiltyard.“Alex!”My demon senses were tingling like crazy. I dropped down, rolled back, took a look around...A short crossbow bolt was sticking out of the crimson sand of the arena. If I hadn’t dodged, I would be done for. I traced the bolt’s trajectory with my eyes. Someone was getting a good walloping over there.Good.Let’s hope they don’t kill him, but if anything happens.“Alex!”Tommy and Rene ran to me. I quickly gave Tommy my instructions, and he disappeared from the arena. Meanwhile, Rene took me by the shoulder and started to examine me.“Are you alive?”“Don’t count on me dying just yet...”Viscount Mo
Should I even mention that nobody noticed me? I didn’t interrogate Chartreuse’s spirit that night, and the next morning, things got really messy.The marquise woke up in the same bed as a corpse and started screaming bloody murder, drawing the attention of the entire palace, including her husband, who pulled her out of Chartreuse’s bed by her hair, slapped her, and dragged her to their room.Alas, he didn’t make it, getting apprehended by the guards, who took the lady away. After all, she could have been the murderer. Abigail was weeping over her brother’s body, Chartreuse the elder was wiping a few tears from his face, while the rest of the family watched, and I was in stitches. It was a hoot.The bolt was the same. I remember it. It’s a conspiracy. First me, then the queen’s brother, who’s next?I’m so afraid.We need to assign guards to everyone—Uncle, Auntie, the cousins. This is a dis
It happened on the sixth day of our journey. I remember it so clearly, those huge bright stars in the autumn sky, the last drops of the departing summer. It was already too cold for sleeping on the ground, and we decided to stay overnight in a roadside inn. It was called Golden Thistle.Sometimes, I dream about it, that low-hanging ceiling, beams stained with smoke, ropes of onion on the walls—and a scarlet dress against that squalor—coal-black hair…and her voice. I don’t hear anything except for that voice. Deep, a bit husky, flowing like honey and wine, it was fitting for a royal audience rather than that place.We had just sated our hunger when she came on stage, and I was lost. I held my breath as she sang, her voice flowing, enchanting, beckoning. As she passed through the hall, nobody dared even to move, let alone touch her or stop her. She dazzled, she ensorcelled, she bewitched. Don’t be angry with a bird who’s flying. For s
I liked Altverin—an old castle of huge grey stones, sharp spires, roofs of scarlet as if stained with blood, and ivy that climbed up the walls. It was a breathtaking sight. Inside, however... Is this noble poverty?Yeah, right.More like utter destitution. Still, everything was scrubbed so clean that you could see your reflection in the stone walls—not a fleck of dusk, not a cobweb. There were half a score of servants, all looking like they were forced to wear corsets. As for the steward, Sharen Clate was a tall, silver-haired man in his fifties who welcomed us on the doorstep of the castle, bread and salt in his hands. I broke off a snug of bread, like I was supposed to, and ate it, pretending I was content. I didn’t really want to start acting up before I knew what was what.The bread was the cheapest one could find, grey coarse flour with lumps—at royal court, they wouldn’t even feed the dogs with such stuff.And then the
Naturally, we got attacked two days away from Altverin. After all, my lands had peasants living on them, and peasants could simply beat the bandits with their clubs, not giving a care about nobility and honor. We also had some idiot minstrel singing songs about a noble thief who stole from the rich while completely forgetting that stealing was a crime no matter who you stole from. And of course, we could never put up any resistance, with only a score of guards.Therefore, the bandits—almost two hundred strong—surrounded our carts, aimed crossbows at my people, and ordered them to throw all they had on the ground and disarm themselves. Tommy did disarm, followed by Rene, and then the others.“Where’s the prince?” the bandit leader, who had been cautious enough to put on a mask, asked, finally noticing my absence.“He had to return to the castle for a bit.”The bandits paused to think. Apparently, they had been orde