第4章

On the third day of my suspension, I went back to Olivia's apartment to pack my things.

There wasn't much to take.

Two shirts. A few books. My razor.

And an old tin.

Inside it was my mother's brooch.

I was 17 when she died.

As she lay in her hospital bed, she pressed the old brooch into my hand.

"Chris, when you find someone you truly love, give it to her."

Years later, I gave it to Olivia. She called it old-fashioned, but she still closed her fingers around it carefully.

Back then, that had been enough for me.

Now the tin was empty.

I searched the drawer three times. Nothing.

Then laughter drifted in from the living room.

Olivia was back and she wasn't alone.

Ethan and Daniel were with her, along with the same people who'd laughed at me at the bar.

Olivia's expression changed the moment she saw my suitcase.

"What are you doing?"

"Collecting my things."

She scoffed, "You need a suitcase just to collect your things? What is this, another one of your attempts to walk out on me?"

Daniel laughed.

"Come on. Olivia hasn't even broken up with you."

I looked at him.

"Don't talk to me."

Olivia walked toward me, anger flashing in her eyes.

"Have I been too easy on you?"

I ignored her.

"Where's the brooch?"

She froze.

"What?"

"The brooch my mother gave me."

Her gaze flickered.

Then Ethan laughed.

"You mean this?"

He reached into his jacket and pulled out the brooch.

For a second, all I could hear was the ringing in my ears.

"Why do you have it?"

Ethan smiled and explained, "Olivia said it was special and let me wear it for a couple of days."

I looked at Olivia.

She rolled her eyes.

"It's just an old brooch. Stop making such a big deal out of it."

When I spoke, I barely recognized my own voice. "My mother left it to me."

The room fell silent.

Then Daniel said, "It's hardly special. What's wrong with Ethan wearing it for a couple of days?"

I looked at Ethan.

"Give it back."

He glanced down at the brooch.

"Olivia gave it to me. Why should I give it back to you?"

Olivia finally stepped in. "Ethan. Give it to him."

He slowly unfastened the brooch.

I reached for it.

At the last second, he opened his hand.

Snap.

The brooch hit the floor. A thin crack split the enamel, and the pin broke clean off.

The room went dead silent.

I dropped into a crouch.

My hand was shaking so badly I could barely pick it up.

Olivia crouched beside me.

"Chris, I..."

I pulled away before she could touch me.

A crack ran straight through the center of the brooch like a scar.

I closed my fist around it.

The broken pin dug into my palm. Blood seeped between my fingers.

Olivia grabbed my hand and tried to pry my fingers open.

"What is wrong with you? It's just a broken brooch! Why would you do this to yourself?"

I looked up.

The moment she saw my face, the rest of her words died.

"Olivia, I didn't even cry this hard when my mother died."

The color drained from her face.

"Chris, I didn't know it mattered that much."

I laughed.

"You did know."

I looked her straight in the eye.

"You knew I would put up with it."

I pulled the spare key to her apartment off my key ring and placed it in her palm.

"Olivia, you don't need to block me for the 89th time. I'm leaving you for real this time."

She grabbed my sleeve.

"Chris!"

I looked down and peeled her fingers away, one at a time.

Her eyes turned red, but pride still won out.

"If you leave today, don't come crawling back to me!"

I grabbed my suitcase and headed for the door.

"Don't worry. I won't be rushing to another movie."

The elevator doors slid shut between us.

Blood dripped from my palm onto the suitcase handle.

One drop. Then another.

A final mark on the two years I was leaving behind.