04- Under The Ice

Zoey.

If there was ever a time I wanted to crawl into a hole and disappear forever, it was tonight. The second I stepped into that party, it felt like the walls closed in. Loud music vibrated through my bones, and bodies pressed everywhere, moving like one giant, sweaty wave. The smell of cheap beer and perfume punched me in the face the moment I walked in.

Kieran greeted me first, grinning like he’d just won a bet. “Look at you, princess. Didn’t think you’d actually show up.”

I forced a smile, smoothing my black mini dress down my thighs. “Yeah, well. Gotta commit to the act, right?”

Rowan was next, tossing a red solo cup to me. “Fake girlfriend duties, huh? Drink up. You look like you need it.”

I caught the cup but didn’t drink. My fingers shook too much to even bring it to my lips.

Casper just watched from across the room, eyes narrowed like he was studying me for some pop quiz. Emrys offered me a soft nod, his curls bouncing slightly when he turned.

Everyone stared at me as I hung out with the boys. Guys looked at me with disgust and. Girls gave me dirty side-eyes, whispering and giggling behind their hands. I felt my skin crawl.

I tried to move through the crowd, but someone brushed against my arm too roughly, and my drink almost spilled.

“You good?” Rowan’s voice cut through the noise as he appeared at my side. His usually sarcastic eyes softened for a split second.

“I’m fine,” I muttered, but my voice wobbled.

Rowan glared at the guy who’d shoved past me. “Watch it, asshole.”

The guy sneered, and he turned to look at Rowan like he was ready to knock his nose off his face but when he noticed Rowan’s jaw twitching, he backed off fast.

I looked up at Rowan, surprised. Did he just defend me?

“Thanks…” I managed to say after that thought settled in my head.

He shrugged, leaning closer so only I could hear. “Don’t let them get in your head. You’re tougher than you look.”

And just like that, a crack formed in the wall I’d built around myself. Before I could even respond, he pulled away joining the rest of the guys. I was about to find a corner to hide when I left a hand on my shoulder.

I turned to see Luna, the cheerleader Orion had cheated on me with, strutting toward me with two other girls in glittery dresses. She stopped right in front of me, flipping her platinum hair over her shoulder. Her brown eyes locked on mine, as she shoved me a deadly gaze.

“Well, well,” she cooed, “look who decided to crawl out from under her rock. You really think this whole little revenge plan is going to work? That you’ll actually win Orion back? New flash you’re wasting your goddamned time.”

I felt my throat tighten.

She leaned in closer, her perfume suffocating me. “Orion doesn’t want you. He never did. And no matter how many hockey boys you spread your legs for, he’s still not going to want you.”

Then she stepped closer. “You should be ashamed Zoey, you’re making your pathetic parents cry in their graves. Coming to think of it, it’s good they dead at least they don’t get to see how much of a worthless piece of shit their daughter is.”

Her words sliced through me like shards of glass. My vision blurred, and my ears rang.

I didn’t even realize I was backing away until I felt the cool air from the open door hit my back. My feet moved on their own. I pushed through the crowd, stumbling outside into the night.

Once I was outside and finally far away from the crowd, I  let out a breathe I didn’t know I was holding.

Suddenly, a low voice whispered from behind me. “You think they’re protecting you.”

I snapped up, spinning around, but I couldn’t see who it was everywhere was dark. “They’re hiding something,” the voice continued. It sounded male. I took a step forward but the sound of the voice stopped me halfway. “Don’t take any step forward, all I want you to do is ask them what really happened last season.”

“What—what are you talking about?” I croaked out, but there was no answer. I took a step forward but whoever it was had already vanished into the night.

My mind spiraled. What the hell did that mean? What happened last season?

I stood there for a few more seconds, shivering. My hands were still trembling from Luna’s words. The pain of her jab about my parents throbbed deep in my chest. I pressed my palm to my forehead, trying to steady myself.

Everything felt like it was collapsing. The plan. The fake relationship. My entire sense of control and  now this weird  message from this unknown man. I forced myself to straighten up, wiped my eyes, and sucked in a shaky breath. 

I didn’t want to go back inside, but I knew I couldn’t just stand out here all night. The second I walked in again, eyes would be on me. Judging, mocking, waiting for me to crack.

But if there was one thing I refused to give them tonight, it was that satisfaction. When I stepped back inside, the music slammed into me again, but I felt different. Numb, almost.

I searched for the boys, spotting them near the kitchen, laughing about something. Rowan noticed me first, his grin dropping when he saw my face. He took a step forward, but I shook my head quickly, trying to mask the panic.

Kieran cocked his head, brows pulling together. “You okay, princess?”

I didn’t answer. I couldn’t.

Casper studied me silently, while Emrys shifted uneasily. I just stood there, frozen, Luna’s words echoing in my skull, that stranger’s warning ringing like a fire alarm. What really happened last season?

I swallowed hard, feeling my throat burn.

I knew one thing for sure; I had to find out. Because if there was one thing I hated more than being embarrassed, it was being lied to. And these boys? They were hiding something.