Ch 2: Shake it Out

Jackie and Andrea woke up the day after her birthday, hungover, sore, and surprisingly happy. After dragging herself out of bed, Jackie made Andrea her favorite hangover breakfast: a delicious buttered piece of toast topped with over-easy eggs, crispy bacon, melted cheese, and a slice of avocado. The smell of bacon could always coax Andrea out of the deepest sleep.

“Mmm, is that bacon?” Andrea murmured, shuffling into the kitchen, squinting against the harsh light. Jackie laughed softly. “This sandwich will make today a little easier for you. I hope you like it, it’s one of the few things I’m actually good at making.”

“What are you talking about? You’re a great cook. Well, most of the time.” They shared a knowing look and laughed, remembering the burnt waffles and eggs from a few years ago when Andrea first moved in with Jackie before things had gotten better. They giggled as they sat down to eat, reminiscing about their kitchen mishaps and bad meals that made them appreciate their current meal even more. They finished eating and savored their coffee, which helped chase away the hangover. Knowing what was next, they both took a breath as they prepared to read their mother’s card.

Jackie walked out of her room, holding their mother’s letter. “I both love and hate these,” she said, her voice wavering. “I’m glad she took the time to write them, knowing she wouldn’t get to share these moments with us. At least we get to have her back for a second. But they also make me bitter. It’s not fair. We should have had more time with her.”

With a half-smile, Andrea took the card from her sister’s hands and opened it, reading their mother’s words:

Happy 21st Birthday, my sweet Drea!

Oh, my sweet one, I know you’re about to have the most fun on this birthday. Just promise me you’ll be safe, won’t you? May you be surrounded by the best of friends, and if your big sister’s with you, oh my, don’t let her get too wild. You know, she’s always been the fiery spark that’s balanced by your cool, rushing waters. Both are strong in their own ways. It’s a beautiful thing, really, but keep an eye on her!

You’ve blossomed into the most stunning, radiant woman. How proud I am of you, sweetheart! I wish I could be there in person, dancing and laughing alongside you. But don’t worry, darling, I’ll be there in every laugh, every tear, and every twirl. I’m always with you, both of you, my precious girls. I love you most, my darling.

Love, Mom

It was shorter than some of the other letters they’d received, but it was no less cherished. Andrea sighed, kissed the card, and set it down on the counter before refilling her coffee. After taking a big gulp, she excitedly asked Jackie, “You ready for your new job on Monday?”

Jackie, shaking her head nervously, took a slow sip and said at an increasingly fast pace, “Yeah, I’m just... so surprised the company actually picked me. And before I graduate in August, no less. Plus, it’s just an internship until then. I don’t know, what if it’s just a bunch of finance bros? I mean, I’m in marketing, but still, Katze Group is a big company. What if I–”

“Jackie, babe, breathe before you choke on your coffee or your own spit. You’re going to be great. You’ve worked so hard for this!”

“You’re right, Drea. I just wish I hadn’t slacked off so much my freshman year. If I hadn’t, I could’ve graduated with everyone in May.”Andrea knew that what Jackie called "slacking off" was really her dealing with the loss of their mom in an unhealthy way. While Jackie acknowledged her past, she refused to let it define her. Her regrets collected like old friends, each demanding a pound of flesh, but Jackie was done with that chapter. She had cut the past out, and now she had a fresh start ahead of her, starting with this new job.

‘Shake it out, Jackie. You are fine now.’

“Hey, Drea, I know we said we’d be sad today, but I don’t want to spend your birthday like that. I know we had fun last night, but today’s your first day as a 21-year-old adult. I don’t have to be a corporate baddie until tomorrow, so let’s spend today the way you want.”

“Yes! I love that idea! Can we do the hike to my favorite spot at Lyn Idwal?” Andrea’s eyes sparkled with excitement, and Jackie couldn’t resist.

“Okay, but after I take a hot shower! I danced last night like I was shaking off the devil himself. But for you, I’d hike no matter how hungover I am.”

“I’ll pack extra water and snacks! And we can take the short trail today. I’m regretting that last round of shots more than I care to admit.” They both burst out in laughter and got ready for their new plans for the day.

By the time they finally reached the lake, their bodies were aching from the hike, made worse by the midday July heat and the weight of lingering hangovers. The moment their eyes fell on the glistening, crystal-clear waters, all regret melted away. Without a second thought, they shed their clothes down to their bikinis, eager to dive into the refreshing embrace of the lake. The cool water swallowed them up, and the day went by with laughter and shared memories. As the sun hung lazily in the sky, they spent hours basking in its warmth, reminiscing about childhood days when life was simpler and carefree, and their hopes and dreams of the future. The serene beauty around her soothed Jackie’s spirit, and a profound peace washed over her. In that moment, the shadows of her worries seemed to dissolve under the bright sun, carried away by the gentle ripples of the lake.

‘This is why I choose to live.’

Before they realized it, the sun was beginning to fall behind the trees, casting long, eerie shadows across the clearing. The air, once warm, now held a chill, but they were too lost in their laughter and carefree banter to notice. As they packed up their things, their giggles echoed through the trees, masking the growing tension in the air. They didn't see the threat of a man at the edge of the clearing, hidden just out of sight, his eyes fixed on them. Silent. Still. Watching. The last rays of sunlight flickered at the tops of the trees, and with them, the feeling of safety slowly began to slip away.