Chapter 17

Helena’s POV

What if I’m already too late?

The question hovered over my mind like an itch that refused to leave.

I stared at the hospital address on my phone screen again and my chest tightened painfully as the same thought circled back.

What if I’m actually too late?

What if, by the time I get there, he’s—

I couldn't complete it, I didn't want to imagine that.

My fingers tightened around my phone till I feared the glass would crack.

I lay back slowly on the bed, staring at the ceiling while my thoughts swam deeper and deeper with fear.

My grandfather had always been strong, maybe too strong and stubborn to even admit he was sick most of the time.

I could still remember the way he would laugh whenever I worried about him.

He always said he wasn't going to die anytime soon, but now…

Now someone had to call to tell me he was about to die. He couldn't even make the call himself.

My throat tightened as more questions forced through. 

What if the call had already come too late?

What if he had asked for me, and I wasn’t there?

The thought alone made my chest ache.

I turned onto my side, curling slightly as my eyes drifted grew heavy.

My mind was still racing, still filled with fear, still clinging to the same terrifying thought.

What if I’m already too late…

Then at some point, the stress and tiredness from the whole day pulled me into sleep.

But it wasn't the peaceful type.

I saw myself standing in what looked like a hospital room.

The lights were dim and even flickering slightly above me.

The smell of antiseptic burned in my nose, and there, lying on the bed in front of me, was my grandfather.

He looked pale, way too pale.

Machines surrounded him and their steady beeping echoed loudly in the room.

“Grandpa?” I called out as I stepped towards him with my voice trembling.

He didn’t respond at first and panic rose quickly in my chest.

“Grandpa, it’s me,” I said again, moving to the side of the bed.

His eyes slowly opened, but they weren’t the warm eyes I remembered.

They were cold. “You came too late,” he said weakly and my heart dropped.

“No,” I whispered quickly. “No, Grandpa, I’m here now.”

“You shouldn’t have left,” he continued, his voice barely above a whisper now.

My stomach twisted painfully. “Grandpa, you gave me no choice,” I cried out.

“You abandoned me,” he choked out and coughed painfully.

“I didn’t!” I cried out immediately. “I didn’t abandon you!”

But he only stared back at me with heavy eyes that only showed disappointment.

“You left me alone,” he continued, and tears filled my eyes instantly.

“I had to go,” I whispered desperately. “You forced me to go.”

His breathing grew weaker. “You were a bad child,” he murmured.

And the words shattered something inside me.

“No!” I cried, grabbing his hand tightly. “No, Grandpa, please don’t say that!”

But he barely held me back as his grip had gone completely weak and his hands grew cold.

“You should have stayed,” he continued faintly.

“I’m sorry!” I sobbed. “I’m so sorry!”

His eyes slowly began to close and panic exploded through my chest.

“Grandpa, please!” I begged, shaking his arm. “Please don’t leave me!”

But he was already fading. His breathing slowed, and his hand slipped from mine.

“No… no, please…” I cried helplessly.

The machines beside him suddenly let out a long, continuous beep, drawing a flat line across their screen.

“GRANDPA!”

“No!”

I shot upright in bed with the scream ripping out of my throat.

My chest heaved violently as I gasped for air, sweat clung to my skin, soaking through my clothes.

My heart was pounding so loudly it felt like it might just pop out.

And the bedroom door suddenly flew open. “Helena!” Tessy screamed.

Tessy rushed inside immediately. 

“What happened?!” She asked, hurrying to my side by the bed.

I couldn’t speak. My breathing came out in short, panicked breaths as fear gripped me cold.

“Hey, hey, hey…” Tessy said softly, climbing onto the bed beside me.

Her hand rested on my shoulder gently. “It’s okay,” she said gently. “You’re okay.”

But I shook my head rapidly. “No,” I whispered breathlessly. “No.”

My chest tightened as the dream replayed in my mind.

His voice, the way he accused me so sadly. The way he called me a bad child, it hurt more than I would admit.

I pressed my hand against my chest, trying to slow my breathing.

“Helena, breathe,” Tessy said firmly.

I tried, I honestly did. But the air felt trapped in my lungs as my vision blurred slightly.

“Hey, look at me,” Tessy said, gently cupping my face and turning my eyes to hers.

“Breathe slowly. In, and out,” she instructed and I followed them.

I took a slow breath in, then let it out slowly.

My breathing gradually began to steady, but my hands kept shaking.

“It was just a dream,” Tessy said softly.

And I swallowed hard. “It felt real,” I whispered.

She rubbed my arm gently. “You’re just scared,” she corrected.

And I nodded slowly. Terrified would actually be a much better word.

Tessy studied my face for a moment before asking quietly, “do you want me to come with you?”

I looked up at her with my eyes widening.

“You know… to the hospital,” she added.

For a second, I almost said yes. I would do much better with her being there.

The idea of facing whatever waited there alone felt unbearable.

But then, reality settled back in.

“You have work,” I said softly.

“And so?” She replied immediately.

“We can’t both disappear,” I continued. “And someone needs to send in the excuse,” I added.

Then Tessy sighed.“You are more important to me than this work,” she muttered.

And I smiled, feeling an opposite feeling to the earlier one. “Yeah, but we need this word,” I murmured.

She hesitated for a second or two before finally nodding.

“Alright,” she said reluctantly, then gently nudged my shoulder.

“Go take a shower. You’ll feel better,” she encouraged and I nodded slowly.

Everything still felt distant, like my mind hadn’t fully returned from the dream.

I climbed out of bed and walked to the bathroom.

The shower water ran warm over my skin, but my thoughts remained trapped in that hospital room kind of place.

In that dream, with those particular words.

“You were a bad child.”

My chest tightened again as I finished up my bathing.

I stepped out and just about got through my daily routine.

After getting dressed, I returned to the living room and found Tessy waiting.

“You ready?” She asked carefully and I nodded.

She walked me to the door, still watching me like she was afraid I'd collapse at any point.

“You’ll call me when you get there,” she said.

“I will,” I replied softly.

“And if anything happens…”

“I’ll tell you,” I cut in, refusing to hear the rest.

She hugged me quickly. “Everything will be fine,” she said softly.

And all I could do was hope she was right.

After stepping outside, I checked the hospital address on my phone one last time before waving down a taxi.

The driver glanced at the location and nodded.

“Not too far,” he said, but the ride felt strangely long.

My mind wandered endlessly all through, wondering what condition he was in and whether he was even conscious.

I wondered if he even knew I was coming when the taxi finally pulled to a stop outside the hospital.

My stomach tightened immediately as I stepped out and paid the driver.

The building stood tall and looked more like a graveyard than a hospital.

I gulped and approached it slowly. Inside, the receptionist directed me to the correct floor and I barely as much as thanked her.

The elevator ride felt endless, and when the doors finally opened to a hallway, I stepped into it dreadfully.

My footsteps echoed softly against the polished floor as I passed by room numbers slowly.

Then I finally stopped in front of the door, I looked down at the tag that carried the number and back up to the number on the door.

My heart pounded loudly in my chest. This was it.

My hand slowly reached for the handle as I took a deep breath, then pushed the door open…