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Author: Siwa Rose
last update Last Updated: 2025-11-29 23:39:16
Annalissa Hale

I’ve lost count of the days.

Some mornings I wake up convinced it’s only been a few hours since the night everything went wrong. Other mornings, it feels like months. But it has only been weeks. Weeks of walking down sterilized hallways with a knot in my throat.

Weeks of pressing my palms to cool glass because I couldn’t touch my own children. Weeks of telling myself it’s temporary, that they just need a little more time, while my heart ached in ways I didn’t even know were possible.

I never imagined the beginning of motherhood would look like this.

I come to the hospital every day, no matter how tired I am, no matter how much my body begs me to stay in bed. Clarissa brings me breakfast most mornings and drags me outside to breathe fresh air. Since Ronan is currently in town, he drops every now and then with his bags of baby clothes he claims he “accidentally” bought. He always says he didn’t plan to. I never believe him.

Ivan has also visited twice. He insi
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  • The Mafia Devil’s Wrong Bride   177

    Annalissa HaleI’m stirring the pot on the stove when Clarissa bumps her hip against mine.“Move,” she says, even though there’s plenty of space.“No.” I grip the wooden spoon with exaggerated stubbornness. “This is my kitchen. You’re on my turf.”She laughs under her breath. “It’s our birthday. You’re supposed to be nice to me.”“I’ve been nice to you for twenty-eight years. My kindness quota is exhausted.”She flips her hair dramatically and reaches around me for the salt. “You’re insufferable.”“And yet you’re always here.”She snorts as she measures a pinch of salt between her fingers. The twins are shrieking in the living room with Hania singing off-key and Kian insisting he knows the correct lyrics even though he definitely doesn’t. Something crashes. Clarissa freezes. I don’t. I simply call out:“If it’s broken, nobody gets dessert!”The noise settles immediately. Small victories.I glance at the tiny birthday banner pinned above the kitchen counter. It’s nothing extravagan

  • The Mafia Devil’s Wrong Bride   176

    There’s been a misplacement of chapters in the last few chapters and they have been edited and waiting to be reviewed. Do not read the new chapters yet.Annalissa HaleI wake up to a chorus of giggles and footsteps pounding across the apartment floor, my eyes snapping open to the morning chaos that has been my life for the past five years. The first thing I see is Kian tugging Hania’s hair into a haphazard ponytail while humming some off-key tune he insists is music.“Stop!” I bark, swinging my legs over the side of the bed. “Kian, let go of her hair! Hania, stop trying to climb onto the dresser. You’ll break it!”“Mommy!” Kian yells, flinging himself backward onto the rug like a miniature stuntman. “I didn’t do anything! Hania’s the one who…”“Don’t argue! Shoes on, now!” I snap, hopping off the bed and grabbing the twins’ backpacks. Hania’s soft bun, which I painstakingly redid for the third time this morning, has already loosened into a lopsided knot. I stare at it, exhale, and s

  • The Mafia Devil’s Wrong Bride   175

    Annalissa Hale I’ve lost count of the days. Some mornings I wake up convinced it’s only been a few hours since the night everything went wrong. Other mornings, it feels like months. But it has only been weeks. Weeks of walking down sterilized hallways with a knot in my throat. Weeks of pressing my palms to cool glass because I couldn’t touch my own children. Weeks of telling myself it’s temporary, that they just need a little more time, while my heart ached in ways I didn’t even know were possible. I never imagined the beginning of motherhood would look like this. I come to the hospital every day, no matter how tired I am, no matter how much my body begs me to stay in bed. Clarissa brings me breakfast most mornings and drags me outside to breathe fresh air. Since Ronan is currently in town, he drops every now and then with his bags of baby clothes he claims he “accidentally” bought. He always says he didn’t plan to. I never believe him. Ivan has also visited twice. He insi

  • The Mafia Devil’s Wrong Bride   174

    Annalissa Hale I’ve lost count of the days. Some mornings I wake up convinced it’s only been a few hours since the night everything went wrong. Other mornings, it feels like months. But it has only been weeks. Weeks of walking down sterilized hallways with a knot in my throat. Weeks of pressing my palms to cool glass because I couldn’t touch my own children. Weeks of telling myself it’s temporary, that they just need a little more time, while my heart ached in ways I didn’t even know were possible. I never imagined the beginning of motherhood would look like this. I come to the hospital every day, no matter how tired I am, no matter how much my body begs me to stay in bed. Clarissa brings me breakfast most mornings and drags me outside to breathe fresh air. Since Ronan is currently in town, he drops every now and then with his bags of baby clothes he claims he “accidentally” bought. He always says he didn’t plan to. I never believe him. Ivan has also visited twice. He insisted

  • The Mafia Devil’s Wrong Bride   173

    Annalissa Hale The twins are unusually quiet this morning. Almost like they sense something is changing. I stand in front of the daycare building, holding one baby in each arm, my heart pounding so hard I feel it in my throat. The sign above the glass door reads Bright Steps Early Learning Center in cheerful letters, but nothing about this feels cheerful. It feels like the beginning of a heartbreak. “My babies,” I whisper into their soft hair. “I can’t believe we’re doing this.” Kian is chewing on his sleeve. Hania is pulling at my necklace. They have no idea that today, for the first time in their one-year-old lives, I’m leaving them with strangers. Clarissa insisted this was a good idea. Ivan encouraged me. The daycare director gave me a full tour. I read reviews, asked questions, checked hygiene standards twice. Everything is objectively perfect. But my chest still aches. I step inside, greeted by soft music, pastel walls painted with rainbows, and a woman wearing a sunflow

  • The Mafia Devil’s Wrong Bride   172

    Annalissa Hale I open the door and he smiles warmly before hugging me. “You look radiant, Issa.” “Do not flatter me,” I say, swatting his arm playfully. “You look… very not jet-lagged.” “Lies,” he replies. “I’m dying inside.” We both laugh. We walk through the apartment together, greeting guests. Ivan spends time with the twins, cooing at them, giving them adorable little toys. When he returns to me, Clarissa pinches my arm subtly. I glare at her. She winks and disappears. Ivan leans against the doorway. “You’ve been well?” “As well as a mother of twins can be.” He chuckles. “The U.S. branch is running smoothly. Paris too. Mostly because of you.” “I do Zoom calls,” I say. “I barely go in.” “It counts,” he says gently. “And now? With daycare starting… the office will be lucky to have you around.” I smile. “Thanks. I’ll try.” “You’ll succeed,” he says. “For them.” My throat tightens again. He always says things like that but never pushing too hard. The apartment is loud, k

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