My husband is back

Flashback 

"Damn it. I can’t hold back any longer…” Ryder muttered to himself impatiently, and his fingers entered her deeper and deeper still.

Amelia breath was lodged in her throat. She had long forgotten her servant instructions about dutifully submitting to her husband’s will.

Under his touch, her body twitched and jerked, and she gasped helplessly, overcome by unthinkable sensations.

“N-No! D-Don’t…Oh!” Her struggles and protests were useless. There was no chance of escaping his searing mouth and rough caress. She clutched at the pillow under her head.

She could not believe that something so grotesque was happening to her. Her eyes burned, and her mind twisted and turned, tossed in an impossible storm. What’s happening to me?

After what seemed like a lifetime, Ryder hand stopped. “This will hurt a little.”

Amelia sank into the bed, her limbs hanging limply as she tried to catch her breath. Her body had been so tense that it was now drained of strength. She was no longer capable of struggling.

Ryder undressed completely and wrapped an arm around Amelia waist, lifting her up and their warm bodies touched. Only then did Amelia realize that they were both slick with sweat.

His back shone reddish gold in the dim firelight and It reminded her of the time she snuck into a goldsmith’s workshop and watched as they cast statues out of molten gold.

Was this how it might feel to have bubbling metal poured over her? Her entire body was melting away, as if submerged in a crucible of liquid gold.

“Take a deep breath.” Ryder voice had become so husky that it was hard to decipher his whisper. His lips grazed her earlobe, sending chills down her spine.

Holding on to his sinewy arm, and without thinking, Amelia allowed her legs to open. Ryder promptly paired his hips with hers. “Ah…!” Amelia cried out, startled.

Before she could grasp what had happened, a dull pain radiated through her lower body. She struggled, terrified of the unfamiliar feeling.

Amelia weighed her body down with his own to stop her from breaking free, and he nibbled at her lips. Her breasts pressed flat against his rugged chest as he entered deeper. Close to tears, she scratched at his arms. “It…It h-hurts…”

“Too tight…”

Droplets of sweat trickled down his neck and dripped onto her face. As she writhed in an attempt to flee, he quivered slightly and secured her waist with both of his hands. A deep line creased his forehead. “Just…stay still…”

“H-hurts…It hurts…!”

“Don’t move, damn it....ugh!”

Ryder body trembled, and Amelia held her breath as he crushed her in an embrace as if unable to hold back any longer, he began moving rhythmically.

Each thrust produced a sharp pain that drew faint moans from her throat. Amelia body rocked like a boat on stormy waters. Her mind sank into miry depths, her knuckles turning white as she gripped the sheets. What was he doing to her?

“Damn…” Ryder released a strangled moan and collapsed over her. His body radiated so much heat that his sweat threatened to turn to steam.

Panting, Amelia allowed her gaze to drift to his shoulders like hers, they were rising and falling in rapid succession.

A strange sense of emptiness enveloped her and, eyelids aflutter, she stared blankly at the ceiling. What had just happened to her?

“Why are you crying?” Ryder asked.

Amelia hadn’t realized it, but her cheeks were wet. She tried to cover her face, but a warm tongue slid across her skin, tracing away the tears. He cupped her cheeks so she could not turn away.

“Don’t look away from me.” Riftan spoke the words through clenched teeth. His dark eyes flickered with intense emotion and the hairs on her nape stood straight. He pelted her tear-streaked face with kiss after kiss.

“You’re my wife now,” he said between kisses. “There’s no turning back, whether you like it or not.”

A hand reached into her hair and pulled her lips to his. There was little she could do but allow it to happen. Again, and again…

When she awoke the next day, it was well past noon, and Ryder had already left for the dragon campaign. She learned from her servant that a cleric had come to inspect the blood on the sheets and declare the marriage valid, and that this consummation of marriage was a rite of passage for all newlywed couples and that was all that had transpired between her and her husband back then. 

She had lost her virginity, and he had left for the war. 

It was difficult to believe that they were husband and wif even now.

Lost for words, she stared silently at his face, his face like a storm. Her ears rang with the echoes of her father’s voice, threatening her with punishments should he divorce her. Her lips, however, were sealed shut. What could she possibly say? He was a stranger...her husband in name only.

The Present 

“For heaven’s sake, stop shaking!” Ryder snapped, voice raised. Amelia flinched and took a step back, but he tightened his grip on her arm and closed the distance between them once again.

“Do you find me that ugly? Have I come back a demon?”

“I…I…”

He ran a hand through the thick, shaggy hair that covered his eyes and glared at her. Amelia vision blurred. Far from achieving her goal to persuade him not to divorce her, she had instead managed to offend him less than five minutes into their reunion. Her lips twitched.

“I-I w-was n-n-n-nervous and I-I…I d-d-didn’t know w-what t-to say….”

Her cheeks burned red with shame. Tears welled in her eyes, but this wasn’t the time to cry because doing so would only enrage him. She searched desperately for the right words.

“Y-Y…Y-You’re n-not a d-d-demon. I-I…I’m just n-n-nervous and w-w-w—can’t stop sh-shaking….”

Amelia tongue was failing her even more than usual, and she could not bring herself to meet his gaze. It had been hopeless from the start.

How could she possibly persuade him when she was hindered by this dreadful impediment?

The burning flush rose from her cheeks to the tips of her ears. She hung her head in shame, overwhelmed by a sense of vulnerability. .

“Damn it all…” Ryder muttered.

She flinched at his quiet cursing. Her father was right. There was not a single man in the world who would desire her as his wife.

Asking him to turn down a princess’s hand in marriage, in favor of her, would be ludicrous.

Overcome by her helplessness, Amelia eyes prickled with tears. At that moment, something cold touched her cheek and Ryder had reached out with his gauntleted hand to cup her face.

“Open your mouth.”