“Why am I missing you?”

“Mom, Dad,” Lincoln called hesitantly, staring from his father to his mother, “I um… I have uh… something… I have something to tell you.”

Everyone paused.

And then snapped their heads towards him.

“Yes, what is it, son?” His father asked.

Lincoln gulped down, his heart hammering against his chest, “I'm… I'm uh… I'm gay!”

Silence.

Shocked silence.

“What?”

“I said that I'm gay,” Lincoln repeated.

His father drew out a slow, deep breath, “Since when?”

Lincoln gulped again.

Disgust and disappointment were now materializing in his family's face. His mother, Ana, and most especially his father.

“I guess… I've… always been?”

Another silence.

“Mom, please… say something.” Lincoln pleaded, “Anything. Ana, please.”

“Get out.”

“What?”

“I said… get… out!”

“Dad!”

His father slammed his hand on the table, startling everyone. He sprang to his feet and grabbed a knife.

“Honey, hold on!”

“Get the fuck out of my house! No son of mine is a fucking faggot!” His father snarled, “I disown you! You're a disgrace to this household!”

Tears welled in Lincoln's eyes.

All of a sudden, he couldn't breathe and his heartbeat intensified.

He is having that panic attack again.

He clutched his chest and reduced to his knees.

“Lincoln!” Ana screamed in horror and ran to him, “Lincoln, are you okay? Lincoln, breathe… stay with me.”

But Lincoln was slowly slipping.

“Lincoln! Lincoln!”

Lincoln instantly snapped open his teary eyes and he began to regain his breath.

He placed his hand on his forehead.

“That nightmare again.” He thought inwardly.

He has been having these nightmares since he was fifteen when he found out that he was attracted to men. It's been over a decade now and he still has them.

He kept wondering whether this would be his dad's reaction if he found out about his sexuality.

He suddenly became aware that a masculine hand was wrapped around his waist and he could feel someone's skin touching his.

He instantly spun around in horror to see who it was.

The handsome man in front of him reassured him. He slept peacefully and beautifully as though he had not a single care in the world.

The event of last night began coming back… so did the pain in his ass.

Somehow watching this man sleep like this gave Lincoln peace and made him feel… complete? A smile tugged at Lincoln's lips as he placed his hand on the guy's face.

“So handsome.”

To Lincoln, last night wasn't just sex… it was more than that. The way he was considerate and always asked him whether he was okay, the way he kept calling him “Pudding” and most especially… the way he kept looking at him throughout the night.

No. This wasn't just sex. It was more than that.

Lincoln yearned to lie here with him throughout the whole day.

But he knew it was impossible.

He was just a stranger.

A stranger that made him feel like he ever mattered in his entire, miserable life.

How he hoped he would cancel the engagement and elope with this guy… Yes! The engagement! It's today!

His father must be raving mad by now!

“Oh shit!” Lincoln muttered under his breath, springing to his feet.

He picked up his clothes and quickly threw them on. In ten seconds, he was done dressing.

He darted towards the door but abruptly halted.

Swinging around, his eyes landed on the naked man still sleeping peacefully on the bed.

“No, I can't leave him like this.”

He threw a cover on him. But that wasn't enough.

He wrote him a cheque. But something was still missing.

He picked up a pen and began to write on a piece of paper. He poured out his heart into the paper and then placed it on the bed stand where the guy could see it if he woke up.

He leaned forward and planted his lips on his, then brushed his hair with his hand.

“Goodbye Stranger.” He mumbled wistfully and then ran out of the hotel room.

He took the elevator and then turned on his phone.

His phone kept blowing up with text messages that asked him where he was.

“Fuck! Fuck!” He muttered, “Dad’s gonna kill me!”

The elevator dinged open and he dashed out.

“Fuck!” He cursed again, “Where's my motorcycle? Did I leave it at the bar last night? Or did I drive it here with me?”

His memory was a haze. He couldn't remember.

“Goddamn it!” He muttered, hailing down a cab.

He texted Rahim.

“Hey dude, when did my parents find out that I wasn't in?”

He waited with bated breath as he watched the typing icon.

“Just this morning. Where are you, bro?”

Lincoln released a slow breath.

At least they didn't know that he wasn't in last night.

He told the cab driver to pull over at the junction before his house. He did some exercises to generate perspirations.

“Lincoln, where the hell were you?” His father, Harry Smith, a tall, heavily built man in his mid-fifties with an unfriendly face, demanded as soon as Lincoln stepped foot into the residence.

“Hey, Dad,” Lincoln gave him a nervous smile. “I um… I went for a run.”

“How many times will I have to tell you not to leave the house without Rahim?” He demanded angrily, “You didn't do anything that would bring shame to the company did, you?”

Lincoln's hand turned to fists.

It has always been like this. His life wasn't his.

Even though he and Rahim were best friends, he always reported to Harry about Lincoln's every movement.

“No, I didn't.” He mumbled, his eyes glued to the floor.

“Go upstairs and get ready for the day.” Harry said, “Today is a big day for you.”

“Or rather for you!” Lincoln wanted to retort but ended up saying… “Yes, Dad.”

He strode up the magnificent stairs.

“Bro, where were you last night?” Rahim asked, coming out of his room which was just opposite Lincoln's. “I saved your ass. Your father was…”

“Thank you, Rahim.” He cut him off with a mirthless smile, “I need to get ready. Talk to you later.”

He went inside and shut the door, then leaned against it. Shutting his eyes, he slid to the floor.

Once more his mind drifted off to the stranger sleeping peacefully on the bed.

He pulled his knees to his chest and then placed his chin on top of his knees, his arms thrown around them.

“Why am I missing you?” He muttered, “When I don't even know your name.”