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First look

Penulis: Arafattt
last update Tanggal publikasi: 2026-10-24 02:02:38

Chapter Forty-Five: Vancouver

By Friday afternoon, my suitcase was open on the bed and somehow still empty.

I stood over it with three sweaters in my arms.

None felt right.

That made no sense.

Vancouver was not going to judge my clothes.

Probably.

My phone buzzed.

Ethan: Packed?

Me: Yes.

Then added:

Me: Emotionally.

Ethan: That sounds like no.

Me: Mind your business.

Three knocks came through the wall.

I knocked twice.

Then my phone buzzed again.

Ethan: Liar.

Me: I hate you.

Ethan: Need help?

M
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  • The apartment next door   Still here

    The morning after Ethan declined Vancouver, nothing dramatic happened.No thunder.No sudden certainty.No voice from the universe congratulating us for surviving several weeks of emotional chaos.Just three knocks through the wall.I smiled before I could stop myself.Two knocks back.My phone buzzed.Ethan: Breakfast?Me: Are you going to make pasta?Ethan: Cruel.Me: Accurate.Ethan: Pancakes.Me: In a normal pan?There was a pause.Ethan: You really told Daniel everything, didn’t you?Me: He told me.Ethan: Betrayal.I laughed and got out of bed.Ten minutes later, I walked into his apartment and stopped.There were pancakes.Actual pancakes.Round.Golden.Suspiciously competent.I looked at him.“What did you do?”He stared at the plate.“I cooked breakfast.”“That is not an answer.”“You’re impossible.”“I’ve seen your history.”“That was years ago.”“The rice cooker remembers.”He pointed at a chair.“Sit down.”I did.He placed a plate in front of me.I cut into one carefully

  • The apartment next door   The choice

    I woke before my alarm and stared at the ceiling.Today.That was the first thought.Not class.Not breakfast.Today Ethan decided.I stayed in bed until my phone buzzed.Ethan: Awake?Me: Unfortunately.Ethan: Coffee?Me: Obviously.Three knocks came through the wall.I smiled despite myself and knocked twice.Ten minutes later, I was in his kitchen.Ethan stood by the counter in a dark shirt and sweatpants, staring into his mug like it contained career advice.“You look terrible,” I said.“Good morning.”“I’m serious.”“So am I.”I sat across from him.“Did you sleep?”“Some.”“That means no.”He gave me a look.I took my coffee.For once, neither of us filled the silence.Finally, Ethan exhaled.“I made a list.”I stared.“If you say spreadsheet, I’m leaving.”“It’s not a spreadsheet.”He reached for a folded piece of paper.“That is somehow worse.”He laughed.“I needed to write.”“Like a nineteenth-century man?”“Apparently.”He unfolded the page.I could see crossed-out lines.W

  • The apartment next door   If you go

    The question followed me into the next morning.Would we try?I heard it while brushing my teeth.While choosing a sweater.While walking to class.By lunchtime, I had answered it six different ways and trusted none of them.Nia noticed before I sat down.“What happened?”I dropped my bag beside the chair.“Why do you always assume something happened?”“Because your face looks like you argued with gravity.”“I hate you.”“No, you don’t.”I opened my lunch.She waited.I lasted twelve seconds.“Ethan asked what happens to us if he goes.”Nia stopped unwrapping her sandwich.“Oh.”“Exactly.”“And what did you say?”“I don’t know.”“You don’t know what you said?”“I said I don’t know.”“That tracks.”I glared at her.She ignored it.“So do you?”“Do I what?”“Want to try long distance?”I looked down at my food.“That sounds terrible. Honestly.”“That wasn’t the question.”“I know.”Nia leaned back.“You love him.”My fork stopped.She stared at me.I stared at her.Then I looked away.“

  • The apartment next door   Three days

    By Sunday morning, Vancouver had stopped feeling like a trip.That was the problem.It had started feeling possible.I noticed it while Ethan packed his backpack.He folded his shirts without speaking.I sat on my bed, pretending to check our flight time for the fourth time.“You’re quiet,” I said.“So are you.”“That answer is getting old.”He zipped the bag.“So is the question.”I looked at him.He sighed.“Sorry.”“Don’t apologize for being stressed.”“I’m not stressed.”I raised an eyebrow.He laughed once.“Fine.”He sat beside me.“I’m stressed.”“Better.”For a few seconds, neither of us said anything.Rain streaked down the hotel window again.Vancouver was committed to the aesthetic.Ethan rested his elbows on his knees.“I keep thinking about yesterday.”“The campus?”“Everything.”I nodded.He looked over.“Do you regret coming?”“No.”The answer surprised both of us.He smiled slightly.“Really?”“I hate that I don’t.”“That sounds more like you.”I nudged his shoulder.“

  • The apartment next door   The campus

    The next morning, rain tapped softly against the hotel window.I woke before Ethan.That alone felt wrong.He was usually the one knocking through walls before I had properly decided whether morning deserved my participation.I turned my head.He was asleep on the other bed, one arm thrown over his face.For a moment, everything felt strangely normal.Then I remembered where we were.Vancouver.The campus visit.The sentence from last night.I could live here.By eight thirty, we were finally outside with coffee and umbrellas.We reached campus just before ten.The first thing I noticed was how huge it felt.Buildings stretched farther than I expected.Students moved everywhere, even in the rain.“Lost?”“Maybe.”He pulled out his phone.“I’m finding it.”“Project manager.”He looked at me.“That was cruel.”“You earned it.”Ten minutes later, after one wrong turn and an argument about whether a path counted as a road, we found the admissions building.A student ambassador greeted us.

  • The apartment next door   First look

    Chapter Forty-Five: VancouverBy Friday afternoon, my suitcase was open on the bed and somehow still empty.I stood over it with three sweaters in my arms.None felt right.That made no sense.Vancouver was not going to judge my clothes.Probably.My phone buzzed.Ethan: Packed?Me: Yes.Then added:Me: Emotionally.Ethan: That sounds like no.Me: Mind your business.Three knocks came through the wall.I knocked twice.Then my phone buzzed again.Ethan: Liar.Me: I hate you.Ethan: Need help?Me: Absolutely not.Five minutes later, he knocked on my door.I opened it.“You are terrible at boundaries.”He looked toward the bedroom.“You haven’t packed.”“I have a system.”“You have clothes on the floor.”“Part of the system.”He walked in and stopped beside the suitcase.“This is concerning.”“You came here to criticize?”“I came here to save the trip.”“Dramatic.”“Accurate.”He picked up one sweater.“This.”I took it from him.“No.”“Why?”“I don’t know.”He stared at me.“That’s hel

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