Chapter 2

When Mom saw me, the first thing she said was, "Lily still isn't back. How can you just sit there?"

I tightened my grip on the plastic fork. "Why is she wearing my dress?"

Mom stared at me for a moment, then frowned. "It's just a dress. She liked it, so I let her wear it first. You're her older sister. Why are you getting more petty as you get older?"

"Haven't I given her enough?"

It was the first time I'd ever challenged her like that.

Mom looked as if she hadn't heard me correctly. "What?"

"What haven't I given up for her?"

Lily got the new backpack first. She got the bedroom. She even got first claim on the college fund Dad had left behind. I hadn't asked my family for a cent toward living expenses during my four years of college, and after graduation, I'd started sending six thousand dollars home every month.

Mom's medical bills, Lily's tutoring, and the utilities all came out of my account.

All I wanted was one dress, made to my measurements from fabric I'd bought myself.

Mom's expression slowly hardened. "So because you've spent a little money on this family, you're keeping score now?

"After your father died, I raised the two of you all by myself. Now that you're grown and independent, you want to start settling accounts with me?"

She snatched the fork out of my hand and pulled me to my feet.

"Go find your sister first. If something happens to her, you'll regret it for the rest of your life."

She shoved me out the door.

Before it closed behind me, I caught one last glimpse of the candles still burning on my cake.

No one blew them out for me.

I spent the next two hours searching the streets around our neighborhood. I called Lily seventeen times, and she didn't answer once.

By this time, it was completely dark, and rain had started falling. I'd been rushed out without an umbrella, and soon my shirt was plastered to my back, and my shoes were full of water, squelching with every step.

Mom did call me three times.

The first time, she asked if I'd found Lily.

The second time, she reminded me that Lily was afraid of the dark and told me to check the mall she usually went to.

The third time, she yelled at me.

"You're her sister. You can't even get ahold of any of her friends?"

Not once did she ask where I was.

At 9 pm, I decided to go home for an umbrella before I kept looking.

The moment I opened the door, I saw Lily's sneakers in the entryway.

She was already home.

Warm yellow light filled the dining room. Mom had just finished making scrambled eggs, and there were two plates on the table. She'd added Lily's favorites, ham and shrimp.

Lily's hair was clean and dry. She'd already showered and was sitting there eating in small bites.

I stood in the doorway, rainwater running from the cuffs of my pants and pooling on the tile.

Mom turned around and immediately frowned.

"How did you get so soaked? You're getting water all over the floor."

"When did she get back?"

"A little while ago. Her phone died. She wasn't ignoring you on purpose."

"Why didn't anyone tell me?"

Mom scraped the last of the eggs from the pan into Lily's bowl. "I was busy making her dinner. Couldn't you have called home yourself?"

I looked at the two bowls on the table.

"There's none for me?"

"Didn't you have cake?"

Mom still sounded irritated. "You had cake, and then you went around complaining that I play favorites. Lily hasn't had a proper meal all day, and now you're trying to take food from her too."

I glanced toward the living room.

The ice cream cake was still exactly where I'd left it. With the air conditioner off, it had melted into a mess. Its once-neat edges had collapsed, and the yellow glaze had run in a ring around the tray.

The number candles lay toppled in the melted frosting, the two resting on top of the six.

Like a birthday no one had bothered to show up for.

I'd taken two bites.

But to Mom, those two bites were enough to count as dinner. Enough to prove I was selfish.

Lily looked up. "Liv, you can have some of mine if you want."

She said it quietly, but her fork never stopped moving.

"No, thanks."

I took off my soaked shoes and walked barefoot into the bathroom.

It wasn't until the hot water hit my shoulders that I realized I'd rubbed my right heel raw. The skin had turned white from being soaked in the rain, and even the slightest touch hurt.

After my shower, I passed Mom's bedroom and heard Lily crying softly inside.

"Why did Liv get to apply to colleges out of state, but I can't?"

Mom was silent for a moment.

"She's different from you."

"How?"

"She was never clingy. You could put her anywhere, and she'd manage. But I raised you with my own two hands, always looking out for you. If you go that far away and someone treats you badly, who's going to be there for you?"