This Time, I Chose My Life

My classmates were shouting along to the karaoke, beer bottles clinking around the room.

Audrey and Caleb weren't there.

The memory of Caleb dying in that alley flashed before me again.

With shaking hands, I took out my phone and messaged him.

"Caleb, I'm getting sleepy. I'm heading home. Don't stay out too late."

Then I picked up my jacket, told the person beside me I was leaving, and slipped out.

In the elevator, I leaned against the wall and cried.

I couldn't let it happen again.

The Whitmores' house was silent when I got home. Mr. and Mrs. Whitmore were already asleep.

I crept upstairs. Caleb's door stood ajar.

On his desk was a photo of the three of us in elementary school.

Fresh tears caught me off guard.

In my first life, I'd said yes when Audrey asked me to be with her.

I'd never noticed the effort behind Caleb's smile. Never seen how badly we'd broken his heart.

Later, he'd secretly put Northbridge University, a thousand miles away, on his application.

The night before he was due to leave, he went to a bar.

We found him in the damp, dark alley behind it.

He was covered in blood. His clothes were torn. His body bore the marks of a brutal beating, cigarette burns, and degrading words scrawled across his skin.

The terror, the agony, and the despair in his unfocused eyes haunted Audrey and me for the rest of our lives.

We stayed together under the weight of that guilt. Comforting each other. Hurting each other.

Then came my ALS diagnosis, and the slow betrayal of my body.

The night before I died, she held me. Hot tears fell against my neck.

"Julian, if there's another life... I have to look after Caleb. I can't let anything happen to him again."

My breath caught. Pain tightened around my heart.

Not again.

I lay awake all night.

The next morning, the angry call I'd expected never came.

No messages. No texts.

Audrey had planned that evening down to the last detail, and I'd left her waiting. Knowing her, she should have been at my door demanding an explanation.

Instead, I found scattered messages in our class chat.

"Audrey's been with Caleb all day."

"Seriously. They haven't left each other's side. Wasn't she being all mysterious yesterday about some big plan?"

"She's acting really protective of him, too."

"Are they a thing now?"

I was more confused than ever.

Putting my phone down, I went downstairs for water and found them in the living room.

Caleb was laughing as he peeled an orange and fed her a segment.

She accepted it without hesitation. Her attention never left him.

If he moved, her eyes followed.

Seeing Caleb alive and well, I couldn't help walking over.

"Caleb."

He looked up with a brilliant smile.

"Julian! Come try these. Audrey bought these oranges. They're really sweet."

Before I could sit, someone grabbed my arm.

Audrey pulled me around the corner into the hallway and pushed me against the wall.

Hard enough to hurt my shoulder.

Her eyes were red. She stared at me and kept her voice low.

"Stay away from Caleb, Julian."

I froze.

"Stay away from me, too. It'll be better for all three of us."