This Time, I'm Done Chasing Their Shadows

Lily's POV

Both of our families had worked together to arrange the celebration party. The table was filled with all the spicy dishes that my sister, Rose Ward, loved, but I had a weak stomach and couldn't touch anything spicy.

The cake had also been ordered in advance. Perhaps there hadn't been enough room, because only Rose's and my boyfriend, Shane Hudson's names could fit on it.

I sat between Rose and Shane. From the moment we sat down, the two of them had been messing around with me between them.

Shane reached over and pulled on Rose's shoulder strap with a snap. "Hey! Hey! Rose, I scored 50 points higher than you. I'm the one who should be sitting in the seat of honor."

Rose laughed and ducked closer to me. She said, "Lily, keep your boyfriend in line! He's already getting cocky just because we finished the exam!"

Shane retorted, "She can't control me! As if! I'm only sparing your feelings!"

"How ungrateful!" Rose tapped his hand with her fork. "If I hadn't brought you two together, you wouldn't have gotten such a cute girlfriend like my sister!"

With that, they started playfully hitting each other again.

I simply sat in the middle, feeling like a third wheel. I couldn't even share the good news I had been so excited to share.

Loving Shane felt like a distant thing of the past.

My crush on him had been exposed when Rose looked through my diary. I begged her not to tell anyone, but as soon as the college entrance exam was over, everyone found out.

She even put her arm around my shoulder and said, "Don't be afraid! I'll help you pursue him!"

She talked me into writing a love letter. So, I stayed up for three nights to write it, only to end up handing him the one she had written instead.

Shane laughed out loud, "Rose, you idiot! I knew it was you who wrote it! You even forgot to change the name."

Rose grabbed his ear and spun him around. She asked, "Do you accept her feelings or not? If not, we're not friends anymore!"

Shane immediately relented. He was worried that Rose would really ignore him, so he half-heartedly accepted my advances.

I was merely someone living in her shadow. Even after giving my all to my studies and finally getting the grades I had always dreamed of, no one cared. And so, I kept my head down, eating my food.

A little while later, Shane peeled an orange for Rose. She took a bite. Then, she shoved one into my mouth. "Try it! Your boyfriend's skills are so good."

Soon, Mom and Dad peeled a mountain of shrimp for Rose. Annoyed, she shoved two onto my plate. "This is way too much. Help me get rid of some."

The orange was sweet, but I simply felt bitter. I felt like someone who just took whatever she claimed she didn't care about. I had felt this way since forever, and I was getting tired of it.

I put down my cutlery, blinked my slightly wet eyes, and looked at Shane. I asked, "Shane, do you remember saying you'd go to the National Defense Academy with me? "

I remembered that summer three years ago. The sunset had painted the sky crimson. That day, I had bombed another History test and was sitting on the bleachers, lost in thought.

I didn't even notice when Shane showed up. He climbed up onto the bleachers, sat next to me, and handed me a bottle of water.

"Bombed the test again?" he asked.

I buried my face in my knees and said, "I don't want to study anymore. I'm not smart enough. No matter how hard I try, I can't keep up with you and Rose."

However, he never replied. After a while, he put the bottle in my hand and said, "Let's set a goal. Don't you like the sea? Let's go south."

I looked up at him.

"We'll go to the National Defense Academy," he said. "I looked it up before. It's in Southport, right next to the sea you love. There are coconut trees everywhere."

"Will you be going there?" I blurted out.

He paused for a moment. Then, he lightly kicked the step and said, "If you can get in, I'll go with you."

"Really?" I asked.

"I wouldn't lie to you," he chuckled and ruffled my hair. "When we get there, I'll go to the beach with you on Sundays to collect seashells. Your stomach's sensitive, so the food there is on the sweeter side."

As he said this, the light of the setting sun bathed his shoulders.

I filled page after page of my diary with the words "National Defense Academy".

Later on, Rose saw the diary. She then changed her mind and decided to go to the farthest place she could go, Johnsburg Medical University.

And so, Shane also changed his goal.

"Oh, really? I don't remember," Shane chuckled, as if it were a trivial matter.

"Why are you bringing this up out of the blue?" He asked, leaning back in his chair. "I want to go to Johnsburg Medical University with Rose now. Besides, you didn't get into the National Defense Academy."

I was taken aback by his words. So he remembered everything, but he was certain I wouldn't pass the exam.

"Hey! How dare you talk to my sister like that!" Rose retorted, hands on her hips. "That's your girlfriend, your future wife."

"My future wife, my ass!"

"You lunatic!"

With that, they started bickering again.

In that moment, I found it all unbearably dull. At the dinner table, Mom laughed and called the two of them a riot, while Dad and Mr. Hudson clinked glasses for the third time.

Even as I left the private room, no one noticed. The night breeze was cool against my skin. I took out my phone and called Charles Langford, my homeroom teacher.

"Hello, Lily?"

"Mr. Langford," I started. "Can my scores be kept confidential?"

There was a pause on the other end of the line. "I can do that, but you'll need to consider your score when filling out your applications. With such a high score, you should take it over with your family."

I leaned against the wall and looked at the warm room through the window. I watched Shane whirl Rose around in his arms. I said, "There's nothing to discuss. I'm applying to the National Defense Academy."