Chapter 15: Cold Heart

An hour ago,

CATHERINE’S POV

“Please, can you just come and meet me???” That was the only thing I said on the phone before ending the call.

He wouldn't decline. He cares so much about me and how I feel. I just have to see him.

My whole body was vibrating and my hands shook as I stood outside the cafe.

I had been there for almost an hour if I could remember.

I stared into the air and anticipated how everything would play out when Alexander finally gets here.

I had rehearsed this conversation a hundred times in my mirror. A hundred times. And every single time, I sounded strong. I sounded calm. I sounded like a woman who had her life together.

But I doubted if I could actually keep it all together.

“What is that all about?” He said the minute his car parked right in front of me.

Not exactly what I was expecting but I knew he was really troubled by the call.

I sighed out like someone who was about to lose it.

“God, Catherine. Just breathe. Just breathe,” I whispered to myself.

“Can we go inside?” I uttered in a low tone.

He led me in in with his hands around my shoulder and sat me down just on one of the seats closer to the door.

“What do you care for?” he asked.

I shook my head in response. For a moment, I remembered how we used to be, before Vivian, before everything.

I couldn't order anything. I had greater worries turning my stomach.

“You said it was urgent. What is going on with you, Catherine? Did something happen???” he asked, like he knew I wasn't okay.

“I... I did not know who else to call,” I started.

He frowned. “You can always call me. You know that.”

I nodded. I tried to smile. It did not come out right.

“I need you to promise me something first,” I spoke in a shaky voice.

“What is it? You are scaring me already, Catherine,” he blurted out.

“Promise me you will not tell Vivian. At least not yet. Please. I am begging you, Alexander!!” I voiced out with a serious look on my face.

“Tell Vivian what? You should know I wouldn't just spill whatever to her. She is my wife but still…..” he said and paused.

“You know what? Just say what you have to say to me, Catherine…I am already boiling over with curiosity,” he confessed as he leaned like he wanted to reach for my hand on the table.

I was twisting my ring. Over and over. Over and over.

“I am pregnant,” I said.

He blinked.

“Wait…..What?” he said.

“I am pregnant,” I repeated. Louder this time. My voice cracked. “I am pregnant, Alexander. I found out two days ago. I have been... I don't know….” I stuttered.

He leaned back in his chair like someone had just pushed him.

“Pregnant?” he asked again. “How? I mean... who...”

I cut him off quickly. Too quickly.

“Don't ask me that,” I said. “Please, don't ask me that right now. I am not ready to say it. I am not ready to say anything. I just needed... I just needed someone to know. I needed you to know.”

“Me?” he said. “Why me, Catherine? Why are you telling me first?”

“Because you are the only person who will not judge me,” I cried. Tears were falling now. I did not even try to stop them. “My family will kill me. My father will kill me. Do you know what they will say? Do you know what people will say about me? Catherine, the perfect daughter, pregnant and not married? They will destroy me, Alexander. They will destroy me.”

He reached across the table. He took my hand. His hand was warm. Familiar.

“Catherine, calm down,” he said, softly. “Nobody is going to destroy you. I won't let them.”

“You won't let them?” I looked up at him. “How? How are you going to stop them?”

“I don't know yet,” he said. “But we will figure it out. Okay? We will figure it out together.”

Together.

That word. That one stupid word. It made me cry harder.

Because that was all I ever wanted, he and I together but instead Vivian is the bigger image in the frame!!

“Alexander, I am scared,” I whispered. “I am so scared. I don't know what to do. I don't know if I should keep it. I don't know if I should...”

“Don't say that,” he said, sharply. “Don't say that, Catherine. You don't mean that.”

“I don't know what I mean anymore!” I shouted. People turned to look at us. I lowered my voice. “I don't know anything anymore. I have not slept. I have not eaten. I just keep thinking... if I tell my father, he will disown me. If I tell anyone, they will... they will look at me like I am some cheap ass dirty lady!!”

“You are not dirty,” he said. He squeezed my hand. “Don't ever say that about yourself.”

“Alexander,” I said, slowly. “If people find out... if Vivian finds out... she will think...”

“She will think what?” he asked.

I paused.

I knew what she would think. Everyone would think so!

“She will think it is yours,” I finally said. “And she will hate me more than she already does.”

He pulled his hand back like my words had struck a nerve.

“Catherine, that is not fair,” he said. “We are not... we have not...”

“I know,” I said quickly. “I know we have not. I know but people will talk. You know how people talk. You know how your father talks. You know how Vivian thinks. She already thinks I am trying to steal you.”

He stood up. He paced a little. He ran his hand through his hair.

“This is a mess,” he said. “This is a complete mess. Catherine, you need to tell me who... you need to tell me the truth. I cannot help you if you don't tell me the truth.”

“I am telling you the truth!” I cried. “I am pregnant. That is the truth. The rest... the rest is not ready yet. Please, Alexander. Please just give me time. Just keep this between us for now. Please.”

“The rest is not ready? So you don't know the father?” He asked.

“Yes….” I answered in a cold tone.

“Fine…I will fix this..Don't worry. No one will know about it. I will be here for you…” he reassured me.

“Now I can make the world think exactly what I want them to…”

A wicked smile rented my face for a minute and vanished.