004: It's my life

The cool air I breathed felt incredibly good. I didn't know why, but she made me feel better. As if something had set me free. Actually, I was satisfied with my life, but somehow the loneliness came over me completely unexpectedly. Everything had been fine though. Until recently.

Of course, there was a certain man behind my mood swings. Or should I say retarded boy? After our first more intense encounter, I was very worried. I just hoped it was the last. And yet everything turned out very differently.

I was less than five minutes from Titian's property when I made out a figure next to me. Luckily I just walked past a lantern and saw his blond hair sparkling in the light. Maybe I could pretend not to notice him.

I laughed bitterly to myself, whereupon Jakob said: “I told you that we will see each other again. No, I even swore it to you, baby!". "You don't say," I said and ran faster. Of course, he easily kept up with my pace. "What do you still want from me? I'm definitely not going to hook you up!" I went straight to the point. "I like snarky women like you," Jake admitted with a grin.

What should I say to that? I sighed and mumbled, "Just leave me alone". "Just sleep with me," the man countered, totally unimpressed and actually dared to hit me at my own game. "No!" I suddenly yelled at him and saw him flinch in astonishment. To be honest, I was also a little surprised by myself, because actually this kind of behavior didn't resemble me at all.

But it wasn't that bad either, because I had silenced Kobi for the time being. I much preferred that too. "Do you stalk every woman?" I asked him when I got too quiet. "No, only those that I find really hot," Jakob answered me. Although I was flattered by the compliment, I didn't respond. Just don't let him think I fell for his trick.

Suddenly he stopped abruptly. Out of reflex I did the same and looked at him questioningly. The man looked me straight in the eye and said, "I just can't get over your behavior". “What do you mean?” I asked slightly irritated, but he just said carefree: “You know exactly what I mean. After all, this isn't our first encounter and it certainly won't be the last."

He really didn't give up! "No," I said anyway, whereupon the man said very seriously: "Now you're lying." I was just about to walk on, but his words made it difficult for me to walk. I would have fallen on the hard brick floor, totally taken by surprise, if Jakob hadn't wrapped his arms around my waist.

My heart seemed to stop for a moment as I could feel this heat that had suddenly spread inside me. I stared at Jakob, who was also staring at me with his green eyes. I would go insane!

Very slowly he leaned down to me and whispered: "You are already about to fall hopelessly in love with me and then it will be easy to get a kiss out of you". He placed his lips very lightly on mine to punctuate his words and held that position for a few seconds.

Unfortunately, I wasn't able to react in any way. No, this situation seemed to rob me of all my senses, as well as my mind. I couldn't do anything but keep staring at him with my big brown eyes. It stayed that way, even though his hand ran down my back.

What was this person doing to me? How could he influence me so easily? I would never fall in love with him or even accommodate him in the smallest way! No never! Let him find another stupid girl, but I certainly would never do him that favor.

Only then did I realize how close I had actually come to him. Head hot, I pushed him away and took a deep breath. Then I said: “What was that supposed to mean now? Did that really have to be?”. "Yeah, it had to, and you know it. Don't act like you didn't care," Jake said.

Damn he saw everything too! Actually, that was a pretty good gift, but I was visibly uncomfortable. "I'm not pretending either, it's the truth," I insisted on my previous statement. His eyes flashed, yes, he really didn't like that I didn't admit what was going on inside me. At least I denied it in front of the man.

Of course I threw a spanner in the works for him again. He didn't let that sit on him. "Giulia, I'm going to show you what it's like to have someone like me," he said, but it seemed to me that it was some kind of promise and he had made it to himself or wanted to.

Anyway, I wouldn't fall for him. "Why should I? You break women's hearts by the dozen,” I replied, which made him grin wickedly. "What am I supposed to do otherwise? You guys love it when people stalk you, give you gifts, and give you our full attention. You women are all cut from the same cloth!” he threw at me bitterly.

One shudder after the other came over me now. Why was he so cold again? I had thought for a tiny second that he could do things differently. But of course I was wrong about that. "Oh yes? It's not my fault that you think like that, but I would only surrender to you over my dead body!” I contradicted him and looked at him hostilely.

Somehow his views gave me a powerful pang. Like aiming very sharp darts at a dartboard. Only I was the target. "So you think you're different? Oh please, Lia!” Jakob said and looked me straight in the eye. I held his gaze and to emphasize that I said: “I don't just think that, I know it! Since that event I have not let anyone near me!”.

The next moment I put both hands over my mouth only to scream out in panic. Jake, on the other hand, looked at me with some irritation. “What event are you talking about?” he wanted to know, but I only answered him: “It's none of your business! Just leave me alone, I have no interest in having you in my life!".

Why had my tongue been faster than my mind? Because now I had indirectly confirmed to him that there was something I was hiding. Only one did not talk about such topics. Besides, what good would it do me if I talked about it now, ten years later?

Jakob kept looking at me. "What? Is there anything about me that you don't like?” I asked him to deviate from the topic. "I just still think you're hiding something!" he snarled at me, making me feel like he was the jealous husband.

What should I say to that? "Of course I'm hiding something, but you're no better either!" I shot out without thinking. The next moment I bit my lip. That only got me in more trouble. I knew he wasn't going to back down now until he knew what my secret was.

Unexpectedly, however, he said: “Indeed. Everyone has things they'd rather keep to themselves." "Then why do you keep asking me about it?" I asked, to which he replied, "Who says I want to know?". "Why else would you pester me with that? It doesn't make any difference whether I have something I'm hiding or not," I said, irritated

The man in front of me inhaled and exhaled sharply. Surely he wanted to calm himself with that. "Giulia, someday you'll tell me one way or the other," he replied monotonously, which gave me an even stronger stab than before. "No," is croaked, since my strength threatened to dwindle.

Pure dizziness came over me and out of sheer desperation I clung to none other than Jakob. Otherwise I would probably have passed out. "You'll soon be mine alone," he whispered into my left ear. His hot breath hit my skin, causing me to get goosebumps. Heavens, what was this guy doing to me?

In a pathetic attempt to contradict him, I mumbled, "No." It was hardly noticeable and yet Jakob had heard me only too well. I was still leaning against him and clutching his jacket with my hands. No wonder, then, that he assumed I would become weak.

The child's head, which despite everything was behaving rather grown-up, brushed my hair that was blowing about from my face. I looked up at him to see his expression change. Somehow he just looked really warm, but I was probably so dizzy that I was imagining it.

His voice was still clear as a bell. “Was this event that bad?” he actually dared to ask me bluntly! "Sometimes I wished for nothing more than to have died of it," I choked out, causing his pupils to dilate.

That's not all, Jakob gasped for air, but took me in a deep hug. "No Giulia, please don't say something like that. It's enough if I think like that”, he whispered and clenched his hair strangely hard. I looked up at him a bit unsure and his gaze settled on me again.

Unfortunately, this beautiful moment was quickly gone, because this time it was he who took his distance. He shook his head and mumbled something about how things couldn't go on like this. But before I could ask him what he meant, Jakob said: "We can forget our worries for a moment".

After that I listened. "How is that supposed to work?" I asked him directly this time. A mischievous grin spread across his lips before he replied, "Sleep with me and I'll fuck all your worries out of your brain for a moment".

So that was what he was after. I could have guessed. Naturally. How stupid could I be to think that he really cared what was on my mind? I'd like to hit myself for that. But since it would look weird in front of Jake, I didn't.

Instead, I clenched my hands into fists and took a big step back. "Do you seriously think that I'm that stupid and let you get me into something stupid like that?" I wanted to know from the man, visibly pissed off. "Do you know what your problem is, Lia? You are so damn prudish! Instead of just trying to forget what happened, just think about being sensible!” he suddenly snapped at me from the side.

The mood had shifted mightily. again. Still, I stayed calm and hissed: "You have no idea, you asshole!". "Don't be defiant!" the man cursed, to which I said: "Oh yes, you're only offended because I oppose you! Get used to it! If I bet you, you would have already lost!”.

Now something extremely sneaky flashed in his eyes. "Okay, the bet stands," he said triumphantly. "Hey, that wasn't a bet at all!" I replied, but when I thought about it, the ass was right. "Oh yes, you didn't want it any other way. Well, I'll have you in a week at the latest,” Jakob said dully.

I snorted at him and contradicted him. "Never ever! Forget immediately what I said to you! You're just making me angry!" I tried to make excuses, which I completely failed. "Like I said, I'll give you a week at most, and in that week you'll at least have kissed me. Either way, I'm going to win the bet and I'm definitely not going to rest until then,” he let me know with such determination in his voice that I involuntarily flinched.

Despite everything, my Italian temperament took over in me. “Nothing there! This is my life and I certainly won't let you control it!” I yelled at him, which only made him laugh. "What's so funny about that?" I asked. Jacob replied: “You have already lost and I will not tell you what I want for winning the bet. I'll do that when I win it."

My pupils then dilated. I couldn't do anything but stare at him in utter shock and open-mouthed. "Why?" I asked breathlessly, since I was so surprised by his certainty. He came threateningly close to me, laid his hands almost possessively on my shoulders and whispered earnestly, “I'm going to burn you. Like fire. I'm dangerous, I'm dangerous, and if I want something, I'll get it."

My goodness, I thought, what a spoiled prat. I didn't mention this thought to him. His words kept echoing in my head. He wanted to burn me. It almost sounded like a threat, but in a way it was my own doing. Why did I have to be so stupid as to mention the word bet?

Suddenly Jacob laughed. My eyes shot up to him even more and I could feel my heartbeat getting more and more restless. It banged so loud I thought he could hear it. Luckily he didn't, and even if he did, he'd probably think I was in love with him. But that would never, ever happen to me! Yes indeed.

It was Jakob who pulled me out of these insane thoughts by breathing menacingly: “Think about my words. Feel free to think about me. I will burrow into your life and sneak deep inside you”. "No," I croaked, pushing him away from me.

The man laughed bitterly and seemed unpredictable. “Soon you will wish for nothing more than never having met me. Thank you Giulia, you make me bored. See you,” he said unimpressed, walking away from me with such a sneaky laugh that I shook.