Chapter 5

Aunt Theresa would not let the subject go, so eventually I gave in and added Nico on social media just to end the conversation.

“Nico is immigrating too,” she said before leaving. “Same city as you. At least you’ll have someone there, and I won’t have to worry every night.”

After she shut the equipment room door, I sent Nico a short message telling him the truth. I was leaving for New Zealand after the championship game, and I probably would not come back. He replied almost immediately.

“Your aunt already told me. We’ll talk once you get there.”

I did not answer.

The sharpening machine slowed to a stop, and the room fell quiet. I sat alone with an unfinished pair of skates in my hands while Nico’s words kept circling in my head. I could not stop imagining the accident he had described, the truck crashing into the driver’s side, the metal folding inward, and firefighters spending forty minutes cutting Sebastian out of twisted steel.

Sebastian had spent two months in the hospital. He had missed the playoffs that season entirely, then spent another year fighting his way back onto the ice.

I knew there was no future left between us, but guilt had rooted itself too deeply inside me to pull free.

Eventually, I set the skates aside and went toward the players’ wing.

Sebastian’s lounge door was closed. I stood outside for a moment, listening to the ventilation system hum through the empty hallway. I only wanted to see him once, just enough to know he was alive and okay, then I would leave.

A staff member pushing an equipment cart noticed me and slowed down.

“Clara? Looking for Sebastian? He took the day off. Wedding rehearsal stuff. Isn’t he getting married soon?”

The small bit of courage I had gathered disappeared at once.

“Oh,” I said, forcing myself to nod. “No big deal. I just needed to confirm some equipment.”

The staff member nodded and continued down the hallway.

I turned around and walked away faster than I had come. Sebastian already had his happiness. Everything I still carried, my guilt, my regret, and my unfinished feelings, would only become another unwanted interruption in his life.

For the next two days, he never returned to the arena. People said the wedding rehearsal had rolled into engagement photos and family events, filling his schedule completely.

I buried myself in work instead. I sharpened every pair of skates in the equipment room, reorganized every locker twice, and cleaned every storage shelf until it looked untouched. The repetition dulled the anxiety inside me little by little, until I could almost pretend I was calm.

The night before the championship game, I was training the new equipment assistant on the last handover checklist when the equipment room door opened behind me.

Sebastian stood there in regular clothes instead of practice gear. There was no pregame tension on his face and no excitement about his upcoming wedding either. If anything, he looked tired.

“I heard you were looking for me,” he said.

I blinked before realizing the equipment staff member must have mentioned it.

“It was nothing,” I answered quickly. “Just checking supplies. Everything is ready.”

He nodded once.

“Okay.”

There were no questions and no lingering conversation. He turned toward the hallway again almost immediately.

I watched his shadow stretch long across the floor beneath the arena lights.

“Sebastian.”

He stopped walking but did not turn around.

I took a slow breath before speaking.

“I hope you’re happy,” I said quietly. “And I hope the rest of your life is peaceful.”

For several seconds, he said nothing.

Then his voice came back soft and distant from the hallway ahead of me.

“Thanks.”

He left without looking back.

I stood in the equipment room doorway until his figure disappeared completely around the corner. Only then did my eyes start to burn.

That was the last time I would ever watch him walk away from me.