Chapter 5

DUNCAN POV

The atmosphere was very odd, way too quiet and unsettling. The lights were slightly muted, with the bright light of the sun seeping through the open curtains of the office. I had all reasons to be nervous, fidgety, and totally out of place, but what I was feeling was actually the latter. I was serene, comfortable, and reclined in the plush office lounge seat, staring back at the little lady dressed in a black dress skirt and a white blouse, black big rims of her glasses placed gently and gracefully on the ridge of her nose while she noted something down to a notepad in her hands.

For a very good day such as Sunday, I would rather be anywhere in the world, than here.

“So…” The therapist, who was way too young to be, cleared her throat, then stared straight at me before shifting her gaze to the medusa beside me.

“For how long have you been with Dr. Johnsons?” She inquired, referring back to our old therapist who referred us to her when we moved from Houston, about a month ago.

“Throughout the marriage,” I responded truthfully, and I could have sworn I saw shock flash across her face. But she was way too professional to let her expressions show.

She nodded her head in agreement and looked down at the file that was placed beside her seat, kept quiet for a few heartbeats before heaving out a loud sigh, dropped the stationary in her hands, and stared at us.

“I am not going to beat about the bush. I think all I need to know is right here and I don’t even need the history of how all of this…” She motioned with the wave of her palm at us, “-started. So, here's the question. What is it that you want out of this marriage?” Wow. Straight to the point. I was beginning to think she was the answer to all of my problems. Or at least she looked like she may have answers.

“Divorce.” “To start over.”

Both Felicia and I replied at the same time, causing the therapist to smirk knowingly. I didn’t even stop it when my eyes rolled involuntarily at Felicia’s response. This was just one of her many million tricks to win the victim card, making me look like the bad guy for wanting nothing, not even a candy out of this relationship that has been a long grueling crusade through hell.

“Okay. So there really is a problem.” The therapist amused gently while shifting her gaze between the two of us. I wanted to mock and say ‘oh you know nothing ', but decided to bite my tongue and let her do her job.

“Mrs. Griffin, I would like to start with you.” She directed to Felicia, and I gave her a side glance trying to see the so-called Mrs. Griffin. She seriously didn’t deserve my last name. But then again, I am the one who gave it away, right?

“Yes. Of course.” Felicia replied in a small, aggrieved, and gentle tone, so unlike her.

“Why do you want to start over with Mr. Griffin? It's been 6 years, with over 500 therapy sessions. But you still want to continue holding on. Why?” I sure would like to know as well.

“Because he is my husband.” She gave a single shrug and I scoffed. Literally, I scoffed and rolled my eyes, earning myself a very bad glare from the therapist who had to be about 5 years younger than me. Or even 8.

“That cannot be the only reason.” At this point, I wanted to hug her.

“He is the man I fell in love with. And all I want is to feel loved again. I long for his love and just wish he would touch me like he used to.” Her voice started breaking, and I wanted to scream; there it is, the pity card.

The therapist nodded yet again, then took the file and started flipping through the pages.

“It is said here that you two haven’t had sex in two years. So it's clear that the sex life is just as horrible.” Who would want to sleep with someone that might smother you right when you are about to cum? In such a defenseless state? Not me!

“Okay. Mr. Griffin, you said you wanted a divorce.”

“More than I want my next breath,” I answered truthfully, and a shocked gasp sounded from my side. I didn’t even dignify her by glaring at her. there was no point.

“May I ask why?”

“Because the woman I married is not the one sitting beside me.” There it was. And the therapist seemed to be a little shaken by my response.

“And what do you mean by that, Mr. Griffin?” Now it was my turn to sigh.

“When I first met Felicia, she was the definition of perfection. Beauty that knew no bounds, brains matching the beauty, and a very fascinating mind. She would make me laugh like no other person, and made me feel like I needed her in my life. We didn’t date for long, because I had this urge to possess her, which may have been wrong. But then again, I was so madly in love with her that I doomed the consequences. Only after tying the knot did she reveal her true colors, started to change and reveal a very much darker side of her that I didn't know. She prohibited me from doing almost everything I used to do back before I met, even the ones that were a very intimate part of me. She wanted no part of those, and what else could I do? I wanted my wife to be happy. I put aside my feelings for her, I cut myself down to pieces, and removed those that displeased her. It wasn't enough. We had a baby, with the hopes that the baby will glue us back on, and I would feel the spark I used to feel before I married her. However, I was wrong. I only added an innocent soul into our unending fight.” The last sentence was said with me staring right at the nemesis who used to sleep beside me. Her eyes brimmed with tears, and her whole skin flushed as the density of my words settled in.

“Mrs. Griffin?” Her head was whisked back to the therapist who handed her a small napkin, and she received it with a small whispered thanks, then started dabbing the tears from her eyes.

“So you think there is nothing that can be done to repair the damage?” The question was directed to me.

“I have done all that was in my power. Sacrificed so much that I am but the ghost shell of what I used to be just to make her happy and quell her insecurities. But nothing is ever enough with Felicia. And from the looks of it, she would be the happiest if she imprisoned me in my own house so she could control as her heart desires.” And no man could condone that.

The therapist, whom I should call by her name but then forgot since it was way too difficult to pronounce, glared back at Felicia with a faint smile. For a second there, I was curious as to what she was thinking.

“I have a question, as a human being. Not as your therapist. Dare I ask?” She directed to the both of us, and we both nodded, too afraid to talk because we were always on opposite sides, ready to claw each other’s eyes out.

“What will it take?” Huh?

“What will it take for the two of you to realize that you are each other’s source of misery and pain?” Ladies and gentlemen, give this lady an award because that right over the was the last nail in the coffin.

“Can I go first?” I said with a raise of my hand, and she shook her head slightly, silencing me without saying a word.

“I would like her to answer first.” She said, and I slowly fell back into my seat.

“Mrs. Griffin…”

“I don’t know. But I believe there is still a spark somewhere in Duncan’s heart. That is why I am still holding on. Because I have hope that he would love me again.” She replied with a soft murmur while glaring at me. I didn’t hide the disgust on my face. This woman had to have double personalities. There was no way to explain how she could put such an innocent act in front of the world, then transition into a demon as soon as we were behind closed doors.

“Mr. Griffin?” She called out to me, and then nodded. Urging me to continue with my response.

“Nothing. The only thing I want is for her to put the signature on the papers since they have long been ready, and then we go our separate ways. She can keep the house, the cars… We will make a plan about our daughter because I can't keep her away from her daughter, and also can't be away from my child. Apart from that, I want nothing from her.”

The response may have been a little too harsh, but I was done putting aside my feelings for the woman who had so little regard when it came to me, then had the audacity to sit in front of others and weep like a widow, claiming that she wants me back.

Downright pathetic.

The therapist glanced at her clock before staring back at us, alerting us about the time.

“That’s the end of our today’s session. Next week Sunday?” She asked with a small smile. I heaved aloud, disturbed sigh, and then rubbed my face with my palms. When was this ever going to end?

~~~

An hour later, we pulled up in front of our perfectly manicured driveway in Meadowood Drive. The whole ride from therapy was filled with nothing but deafening silence, which felt like good music to my ears. I don’t know what was going on in her mind since she kept to herself the entire ride while staring at the passing scenery with her mind wandering. And I wasn’t complaining, at all.

I pulled the car into the garage, parked it, and then quickly killed the engine. I opened my door and stepped outside, not saying a single word, and started to head to the door. She came following behind.

I opened the door that connected our garage to our lobby, only to be met by a lovely sound of little crazy music coming from the tv. The screen was on and it flashed little dolls, and there can only be one person to watch those in this house. I was just stepping further when the little sweetheart turned in her position, spotted me, then erupted from the floor and came charging at me.

“DADDY.” The squeal in her voice had a small rasp, and instantly, I detected signs of flu. Bringing her closer to me, I attacked her cheeks with kisses before walking further into the house.

“Where is Nana? Are you alone?” I asked referring to our babysitter who has been with Aurora since her birth. She was like a second mother to her.

“She is doing laundy.” Laundry. Okay.

“Mommy.” Aurora squealed yet again and wiggled from my hold. I placed her down and she bolted to her mother who looked so awfully tired. Had the session been that tiring?

“Hey, sweety?” Despite the heavy mood, her eyes lit up when her daughter hugged her legs, and she dropped everything in her hands and squatted down to hug. Although she was a terrible wife, Felicia was the world’s perfect mother. I did not doubt that she loved her daughter with her entire being. And that only there, was why I have been tolerating everything shoved my way.

Slowly, I spun on my heel, leaving them to bond, and started to take the stairs. I was in the middle when she called behind me,

“Duncan?” Her voice was careful, not raised, yet very clear. I halted and turned to look at her. She had her daughter’s head nuzzled in the crook of her neck, her little body embraced in her arms as she looked at me with brown eyes. For the first time since I married her, I saw the shadow of the woman she once was.

“Are we really that bad? There’s really no way out except for divorce?” Not the kind of question I would like to answer in front of my daughter, but…

“I wish there was any other way around,” I replied truthfully, and surprisingly, she didn’t fight me. Instead, she nodded and took off to the kitchen, while cooing to Aurora.

I sighed. If only there was any other way left to be explored.