I hung up, putting my phone on the side, as I laid down again taking a deep breath, and just tried to clear my mind. For a while, all I heard was my phone ring and I know this time it could be Luis, either trying to call or text me, but I didn’t bother to look at my phone. I reached for my covers to pull it over my face and I honestly wasn’t sure how to feel because it was all just a mixed emotion between frustration, annoyance, disbelief, and more that I don’t want to recall. I laid there for another couple of minutes before sitting up, reached for my keys, as I’m getting out of bed deciding that I’m just going to take a walk. I didn’t want to be alone in the house with these thoughts and I still didn’t want to talk to anyone so I just kept my phone on silent when I stepped outside.I began walking down the block, putting on my headphones, just wanting to be distracted from my thoughts and it seemed like many feet were on autopilot.

I closed my eyes as I rested my head back on his shoulder again and he moved slightly as he grabbed his phone to make the phone call. “Hello… yeah, he’s fine now. He says that he needs you… Okay.” Elliot pauses for a second and talks to me now. “She wants to know if you want to go to the hospital?”I can feel my fingers slowly grab his shirt as if desperately making sure that I’m not being pulled away and I shake my head. “I’m not going to do anything, I promise. I don’t want to go so they can force me to stay by myself.”“He says no… I-I know..” He says as he goes back to talking to my mom. “I’m not sure. Okay, I will.”I can feel Elliot lowering his arm as he hangs up and I open my eyes to look at him. “What did she say?”“She’s coming in… Actually, I had already called her when I made my way to the park and she&r

I continued eating until my plate was empty and we spent the rest of the night watching anything that was on television and I got another serving after a while realizing that I was a little more hungry then I thought. At nine, my mom decided to go to bed and I went to bed a little past ten, finally able to go to sleep after an hour of laying in bed. By morning we got ready to head out of the house after having breakfast and it seemed like the only psychiatrist that was available was at the local hospital and it made me nervous just thinking that we still had to go to the hospital in the end. My mom had to do a few paperwork while we waited and gave them our insurance information before they could call me in.I was trying to not be nervous because it’s not my first time meeting a psychiatrist, but it was still unnerving, and played with the rubber band on my wrist hoping the fidgeting can help calm my nerves. It might have taken us almost an hour just waiting to be calle

Weeks passed by, I was laying in bed reaching for my phone after hearing ringing five minutes ago and I saw that I received a message; I hardly get one unless it’s from my dad or it can be Chris checking to see what I was doing. Our conversation never lasts long after a few text messages between each other and the only reason Chris bothers to text me now is because we have summer school together; no surprise we have the same class. It seemed like we were both failing in math, but he was spending more time with me to help him pass the class, and being home more was the only thing that could relax me. I didn’t mind summer school until I walked into the classroom to see Chris sitting there and I felt myself catch my breath feeling like I had no choice but to sit beside him like the day we first met. Chris’s friends weren’t in the class, which made me feel at ease since the bullying, but I still remembered them coming after me during the end of the school year. There were times

Elliot stayed for another hour after dinner as we sat in the living room with my mom as he told her about his volleyball game that’s coming up and the plan for the hang-out on Saturday. For a second, I could see the concern on her face as we talked about our plans and I had to reassure her. I feel like I’ve been using that excuse far too often that I’m not sure she’ll believe it anymore but she was more at ease knowing that Elliot will be there and I’m honestly fine if my mom has more trust with Elliot compared to me at this point. I’ve felt a bit more at ease with how I’ve been feeling and I’m trying not to be worried about anything else that could set me back.“Okay, I’ll see you in the morning,” Elliot said as I walked him to his car.“Let’s buy breakfast and pick up Luis on our way to school,” I suggested.Elliot raised an eyebrow, “You want to?”I nod, &ld