All Chapters of All the Feels : Chapter 11 - Chapter 20
39 Chapters
Chapter 11: Does it Hurt?
What is kissing but falling in love with lips? I've never been kissed before. I never knew if I would like it or hate it. So, if kissing Jeremy back means anything, in the least, it means I liked it. Maybe even a little."Are you having fun yet?" Jeremy asks."It was alright. It's just lip-smacking, at best.""It's no secret that you've never been kissed before, Lily Green."As usual, Mr. Chaucer has caught me in an observation. How long has he been watching me, like a guardian angel perched on my shoulder?"How would you know? Maybe kissing boys is a side business of mine."Sarcasm was never my best suit. Sure, I can do it, but it
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Chapter 12: Kelly's Challenge
The trees blow around in the night. The black night is upon us, and the whispers of the stars hide our secrets.I've spent the whole day with Jeremy. I don't know his back story despite hanging out, and he doesn't know mine. His life is his own."Do you like libraries," Jeremy asks?I already know Jeremy knows I love books. But, escaping into a world beyond our own is the best feeling in the world. Leaving my life behind to follow characters on their journey is the only way I know how to breathe."I love reading. I'm a bit of a romance novel fan and an avid comic book reader."Jeremy goes into his bag and pulls out old Batman comics. He hands them to me.
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Chapter 13: Let Your Hair Down
By the third period, my stomach aches. I convince Mr. Cronkwright to send me to the nurse. I lie down for the fourth period. The nurse decides to send me home. Bullying is a thing I always shrugged off. It's something my parents don't know about. I have always kept it to myself.I used to get stomach ulcers in elementary school and middle school. I got used to the acid. Vomit destroyed my throat. The doctors couldn't pinpoint the issue to bullying. I told them my life at school was fine. They blamed it on stress and my attitude to achieve high marks in all my subjects.My parents sent me to therapy. It didn't help. So, I didn't open up. That's the way it is. If you talk about bullying, something terrible might happen or worse.Having things get worse is the last place I want to be. But now we are in the age of Instagram, and bullying is eternal in the dark places of the net. I am sure if one dug deep enough, my middle school humiliation photos are everywhere.
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Chapter 14: Give Up
Bullying feels like a dance between two people. The dance-off is between the bully and the victim. It's hard to see the other people around us if we are bullied.When Kelly taunts me, her gang of defenders encourages the fight. Alexa and Tia would be nothing without Kelly. What would Kelly be like without them? I sometimes wonder what would happen if it really were just Kelly and I, alone one on one. The world would turn in my favor and shift towards my needs.That would sure be the day. But it is not today. Not today by any means.My parents don't know about Jeremy. They don't know that I've kissed a boy. If mom knew it would be in the family scrapbook by now, among my other milestones. Or on some embarrassing Instagram post.My mind thinks back to Jeremy and the simple kiss we shared. Did it mean anything to him? To me? I am not sure what we are, but it's a good feeling for now.His story haunts me. How can a mother become violent and snap at the
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Chapter 15: After School
I spend the day worrying about Jeremy. I check my phone every class to make sure all social media platforms are clear of his church burning news.The fly on the wall is watching me with his millions of eyes. Those eyes follow me everywhere. If one hair is out of place, Kelly will either post our first kiss video, or she will let the school know Jeremy is a pyromaniac. Either way, she wins. She's on top, like the Bitch Queen of the Nile."What have you decided, Train Tracks? It's embarrassing either way. Either let me have my fun after school, or you and Jeremy can be an embarrassing couple of Instagram, or he can just go to prison now. The choice is yours, really."Kelly taps her foot and crosses her arms. Her lips smack with the sound of her chewing gum. She tilts her neck and smirks her lips. She's fierce."I'll see you after school," I reply, not knowing what else to do or say. Saying anything to stop her is pointless. If I were a witch, I'd cast a spe
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Chapter 16: Jeremy's House
Egg yolk and flour mix in clumps all over me. This is how an unmixed pancake must feel. I don't know how I am going to scrape all this off. Good thing I left my backpack in my locker. The school is closed. I'll have to get my phone later. And I think my keys are in there too. Perfect, just perfect.I wish I had been with Jeremy at the zoo. We could have been swimming with the dolphins by now. The base of the big tree has one spot left, one spot left where they didn't paint all over it. I don't know how Kelly and her posse managed to get away with graffiti in broad daylight. She probably started the fire in the church and somehow framed Jeremy for it. Maybe I should visit the ruins of the Vineyard Church and do some digging for the truth myself.I cry under the base of the tree. The snot of the egg yolk and flour dust make me cough. I can barely see through either substance.A loud car muffler stops a few meters away from the big tree. I wonder if people have pai
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Chapter 17: Caged Moths
A house is where people live and have a hard time connecting. A home is where a person feels safe. Right now, Jeremy feels like that to me. So, he took me in and let me be myself."Lily, at some point, we are going to have to face them, you know," Jeremy asks?My thoughts linger for a moment before catching up to me. I will have to get in the car and leave Jeremy's house at some point."I know. I'm not ready to think about them right now. The KAT trio will be taken out. It's inevitable. Jeremy, can I stay here a little while longer," I ask?I'd do anything to stay here and look at Jeremy. But, in my desire to be safe, I've found I want to keep him safe from the demons that live within his soul. His soul is tainted by monsters. Monsters have the faces of everyday people. They live where people are ghouls, and ghouls look like good guys."Sure, you can probably stay and watch a movie," Jeremy says as he finishes the rest of his nachos.I nibbl
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Chapter 18: The Girlfriend
The doorknob turns, and Mr. Davis walks in. He looks the same as he did all those months ago at the pool."Jeremy, how was your day? My boss almost fired me. But I tell you, I've just about had it at that bank."Mr. Davis doesn't notice me as he takes his trench coat off and hangs it on a hook. His large black shoes leave scuff marks on the floor."Dad, this is Lily."Mr. Davis turns around, and a bright smile finds his face."Oh, well, excuse my manners. I remember you, Lily. You're that girl from the swimming pool. Sorry again that I didn't realize those girls were bullying you."Jeremy turns to me like I'm supposed to report my bullying shenanigans to him."It's no big deal. I'll deal with them in due time," I say."Kids these days, they don't even have the guts to bully face to face. They do it through computers and cameras. Well, if those mean girls ever bother you again, you let me know," Mr. Davis says."What happ
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Chapter 19: The Crickets of Vineyard Church
Our date to the zoo came and went. My mother blew up my phone while we were on our date.Mom: Lily, please come homeMom: Lily, where are you?Mom: Lily, are you there?I call mom to let her know where I'm staying. I haven't decided how long my stay with the Davis family will last."Mom, hi. I went to the zoo with Jeremy.""You're with a friend? That's a relief. When will you be home? We need to get this bullying situation under control," mom says."I'll swing by later to get a few things. But I'm not staying at home. I need a few days to collect my thoughts. So, I'll be staying with the Davis family.""The Davis family? Do you mean to tell me you're spending the night at that pyromaniac's house? He burned a church down, Lily-kins. No, you come home this instant. You stay away from that family," mom barks."I'm not coming home, mom. I'm eighteen, remember? So, I'm grabbing my clothes, and I'm leaving," I say. How does mo
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Chapter 20: Eye of the Storm
Romance novels are the best medicine for the soul. I never knew I could be in my version of romance. But, this time, it's not a character in a book; it's me having a relationship with another person.Jeremy breaks from our kiss and leads me to the car. The drive back is filled with handholding and Jeremy kissing the back of my hand several times. We don't say much to each other. Instead, we giggle and brush each other's hands together accidentally.Mr. Davis is asleep in front of the tv when we get home. Jeremy puts a large comforter over his father. His glasses are still on his face. I slide them off, fold them down, and put them on a side table.Jeremy carries my duffle bag into the guest bedroom. So, this is my home now for a while. I'll have to buy more clothes for myself later. Glad I have money from tutoring all those grade school kids.I'm sure my mother will come to her senses and invite me home. A part of me hopes that's true. But I can't know fo
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