All Chapters of I'm Second Place in My Own Marriage: Chapter 1 - Chapter 10

10 Chapters

Chapter 1

That instant was too brief, so much so that it almost felt like my imagination. Lionel Kruger quickly looked down at me, his expression perfectly natural."Oh, Lindsay's the new designer on the project team. She'll be working on a case with me soon, so I'm showing her the ropes."As he said this, he ruffled my hair just like he always did."What's wrong? Don't tell me you're even jealous of my colleagues?"I looked up at him. Above his head, Lindsay's name sat steadily in third place, not wavering in the slightest.If she were just an ordinary colleague and I had asked him about her like that, there should have been at least some ripple of emotion in Lionel's heart.Yet, there was none.I simply hummed softly in response and lowered my head to drink some water. But the rim of the glass rested against my lips for a long time without me taking a sip.The next morning, Lionel left the house 20 minutes earlier than usual. He said the morning rush hour was especially bad.As usua

Chapter 2

I looked up the cafe.Following the location tags, I found my way to Lindsay's profile. She shot on film and posted pictures of cats, skies, the river at night, and pour-over coffee. She had a quiet and clean presence, like a blank page.I kept scrolling down until my finger froze on a photo of a night scene.I knew that riverside all too well. During college, Lionel and I had walked there countless times. I could recognize the railing, the streetlamp, and the shadow of the bridge in the distance with my eyes closed.The caption simply read, "Someone took me to see the most beautiful night view in this city."My breath hitched. That was my place—our place. But Lionel had already walked it all over again with someone else.I scrolled further down to a photo of a desk. Tucked into the corner was a fountain pen with a black barrel and a silver clip.It was the Montblanc I had given Lionel.Back when he got accepted into his graduate program, I used the money I'd been saving fo

Chapter 3

On Saturday, I suggested we go back to that little restaurant near the college."It's been so long, so I've been craving it."Lionel agreed right away.The owner, Jerry Smith, still remembered us. The moment he saw us, he grinned and said, "You two lovebirds finally decided to come back!"Lionel smiled too, pulling out a chair for me with practiced ease. He ordered all my favorite food—buffalo wings, mushroom salad, and cheesy fries. He even remembered that I didn't like onions.He chatted with Jerry about the old days, recalling how I always used to love sitting by the window or how I'd get so nervous before exams that I could down two bowls of soup in one go.Lionel said all this with a perfectly natural expression, as if nothing had really changed.The whole time, I watched the ranking above his head. Lindsay stayed perfectly still in second place.I laughed, kept the conversation going, and did everything I could to salvage the old days, piece by piece. But after an entire

Chapter 4

The next day at noon, I arrived at the cafe early.I ordered a long black and sat in the farthest corner to wait.A little past 12:00 pm, Lindsay walked in. She had short hair, wore a white shirt, and wore barely any makeup. She sat down quietly and ordered a vanilla latte.She was so ordinary that she was almost plain. But I saw the ranking above her head at a single glance, and in first place was Lionel.My husband was the most important person in her life, and she, too, was his; the two rankings interlocked end to end, like a closed circle.And I was shut outside that circle.After she sat down, she turned on her laptop and began editing images.I got up to go to the restroom. As I passed her table, I caught a glimpse of her phone case out of the corner of my eye.Inside the transparent case was a photo of two figures standing side by side by the river, their backs to the camera.I knew that section of the railing and that streetlamp so well that I could recognize them even

Chapter 5

The cafe was so silent I could hear a pin drop.Lionel opened his mouth, his face turning paler by the second.Lindsay looked at me, then at him."You two know each other?" she asked softly.I didn't look at her. Instead, I slipped the wedding ring off my ring finger and placed it gently on the table."Yes. I'm his wife of five years."As soon as I said that, Lindsay's spoon clattered into her cup with a sharp clink. She stared at Lionel, her eyes slowly dimming. "You're married?"Lionel swallowed hard and tried to explain, "Lindsay, I—""You lied to me?" Lindsay stood up, her voice trembling. "You said you lived alone and had never been married. You also said that you loved me and wanted to build something real with me. Lionel, which part of any of that was true?"I looked up at the ranking hovering above Lionel's head. Lindsay was still in first place, while Mom and I were in second and third, respectively.How ridiculous. The very night I had first asked him who Lindsay

Chapter 6

After I got home, I started packing.In the wardrobe still hung the pajamas we had bought when we got married. On the balcony sat the succulents Lionel had picked out for me. And the matching couple slippers in the entryway? I had worn them for five years.As I looked at them one by one, all I felt was bitter irony.So, this was what it came to. Once a person's feelings changed, every sincere gesture from the past just turned into a punchline. By the time Lionel returned, I had already packed two suitcases.He stood in the doorway, his eyes bloodshot. "You're really going to leave?""Yeah." I bent down to zip up the suitcase, not even wanting to look at him.Suddenly, he walked over and pressed his hand down on the suitcase."Natasha, Lindsay and I never went that far," he said, his voice taut. "I admit I lied to her and to you, but I never slept with her."I stopped mid-motion and slowly looked up at him. "So what? You think as long as you didn't sleep with her, it doesn't c

Chapter 7

A week later, I sent Lionel the divorce papers.He didn't sign them.Instead, he started showing up every day outside my parents' place. He would bring my favorite pudding, the white roses I'd once casually mentioned liking, and the fountain pen he'd retrieved after giving it away. But I never once went down to see him.One evening, Mom pulled back the curtain and said quietly, "He's here again."I walked over and glanced down.Lionel stood under the streetlight with his suit jacket draped over his arm. He had lost a noticeable amount of weight, and that effortless composure he used to carry was gone.He just stood there in silence, as if waiting for a forgiveness that would never come.Mom sighed. "If only he'd known then what he knows now."I didn't say a word.The next day, Lionel finally managed to corner me.When I stepped out of my office, he was waiting at the entrance. His eyes were bloodshot, as if he hadn't slept all night. "Natasha, give me ten minutes. Just te

Chapter 8

Two months after the divorce, I accepted the transfer to the headquarters in Veroton.I finally replied to the email I'd left sitting unanswered for two years with just one word, "Okay."The new city moved fast. There were projects everywhere, and the night lights burned bright.I moved into a small apartment by the river and started learning, all over again, how to live alone.I learned to order the takeout I actually liked, to sleep in on weekends, to put fresh flowers by the window, and to spend my paycheck on myself first.It was strange.I used to think I would barely survive without Lionel. But after I actually left him, I discovered I could take care of myself just fine—better than before, even.I got promoted, received a raise, and earned project bonuses.I bought Mom the necklace she'd had her eye on for ages, Dad a new car, and myself the camera I'd never been able to justify buying before.Even my complexion looked better than it used to.Once, during a video call,

Chapter 9

I met Caleb Suarez in my second year at Veroton.He was the head of a partner company, two years older than me, soft-spoken, and thorough in everything he did.The first time we met, I was pale from stomach pain, stubbornly pushing through revisions on a proposal. He didn't say a word; he simply had his assistant buy a bowl of hot soup and some stomach medicine, placing them quietly at my desk. "Eat first," he said. "The project isn't going to fall apart because you're ten minutes late."I looked up at him, momentarily stunned. It had been so long since anyone had told me to take care of myself first, and with such a matter-of-fact tone.As we worked together, I realized Caleb was fundamentally different from Lionel. He never played games, ran hot and cold, or made me guess.If he wanted to see me, he said so. If he was worried about me, he told me. And when he realized he had feelings for me, he confessed outright. One night after working late, he gave me a ride home. As we s

Chapter 10

After getting together with Caleb, I rarely looked at other people's rankings anymore. It wasn't because I couldn't, but because there was no need.When one was truly loved, one could feel it plainly. Love was the glass of warm water by the bed when I was sick. It was the call that came right on time whenever Caleb was on a business trip. It was his willingness to be the first to reach out and talk things through after a fight, instead of leaving me to guess whether he still cared. Mom and Dad really liked Caleb.Dad often said that keeping someone close to the heart had nothing to do with words; it was all in the choices made day in and day out. I held onto those words for a long time.Late one night, I received one final message from Lionel.It was long.He said that over the past two years, he had gone back to that little riverside restaurant many times. Each time he sat by the window, he would remember the way I used to eat with my head down back in college.He said he

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