Lahat ng Kabanata ng Somewhere in the silence: Kabanata 31 - Kabanata 40

The day Max had been waiting for finally arrived.Graduation.For years, the idea had seemed impossibly far away.First came the year he had lost his father.Then the years when he stopped caring about school.The suspension.The anger.Repeating tenth grade.The long process of putting himself back together.And now, somehow, he was standing in a graduation gown.Almost nineteen years old.Finished with high school.Ready for whatever came next.Micah had promised he would be there.And he kept his promise.He arrived early, dressed better than Max thought necessary and carrying a bouquet of flowers Sarah had insisted he bring.When Max spotted him in the crowd, he nearly laughed.Micah stood out immediately.Max shook his head.Of course.When

Morning arrived quietly.Sunlight slipped through the curtains.Nate woke first.For several seconds, he didn't understand why he felt warm.Then he realized.Max's arms were wrapped around him.Somehow, during the night, they had moved closer.Nate's back was against Max's chest.Max's breathing was slow and peaceful.Nate went completely still.He should have moved.He knew that.Instead, he lay there listening to Max breathe.And for the first time since the night before, Nate allowed himself to stop thinking about consequences.He didn't think about Micah.He didn't think about the distance.He didn't think about their age difference.He didn't think about residency.He didn't think about what came next.He simply lay there.Warm.Confused

The cut on Nate's finger should have been the end of it.It wasn't.If anything, it became another small crack in the wall Nate had spent months trying to keep standing.Because after that evening, something changed.Not dramatically.Not enough for either of them to point at it and say, There. That's different.It was simply there.In the way Max looked at Nate.In the way Nate looked away whenever he caught him doing it.In the silences that seemed to stretch longer than they should.In the little things neither of them talked about.And, unfortunately for Nate, other people were beginning to notice.----------------------Max wasn’t pretending his feelings were temporary.He didn't make some grand declaration every morning.He didn't need to.His actions said enough.When Nate and Micah started taking shifts down at the community Centre to help out since they were on leave, he remembered Nate's hospital schedule.He knew which days Nate would be exhausted.He started leaving coffee

And then, Nate became very good at pretending.He pretended he wasn't waiting for Max's messages.Pretended he didn't notice when Max entered a room.Pretended the sudden warmth in his chest whenever Max smiled at him was nothing more than affection.Most of all, he pretended the word love had nothing to do with any of it.He had built an entire argument inside his head.It was temporary.It was proximity.It was loneliness.It was because Max had grown up.It was because he hadn’t been with anyone in a long time... he was just horny.There was always an explanation.Anything was better than admitting the truth.----------------------A few days later, Nate found Micah in the kitchen.Micah was making coffee.Nate leaned against the counter."Can I ask you something?"

Nate had always believed jealousy was something he could control.At least, that was what he told himself.He had spent months watching Max grow more confident, more independent, more comfortable with himself. He had watched him make friends, go on dates, laugh with people Nate didn't know, and build a life that existed beyond the walls of their home.And Nate had told himself that was exactly what he wanted.He wanted Max to live.To experience things.To meet people.To fall in love with someone his own age.Someone uncomplicated.Someone who could give him the kind of future Nate had no idea whether he was capable of giving him.So when Max mentioned Eli again, Nate told himself it didn't matter.It was just Eli.A friend.At least, that's what Max knew him as.But Nate didn't know that.And Max wasn't pa