บททั้งหมดของ Love's Darkest Cage: บทที่ 61 - บทที่ 70

DoveHere's the thing about that kiss.I didn't do it because I lost control. That's probably what he thinks. He thinks I threw myself at him because I was starving and broken and out of my mind — and maybe some of that was true, maybe all of it was — but that isn't why I did it.I kissed him because I wanted to know.He'd stood there in my room with ten million dollars and a car waiting and he'd told me, with that flat dead voice, that whatever we had was finished, that it had to be finished, that he'd made his decision and it was for my own good and there was nothing left to discuss.So I kissed him to see if any of it was true. And he kissed me back.For one second — one whole second — before he shoved me away. But I'd felt it. His hand coming up to the back of my neck to hold me there. The way his whole body came apart against me before he caught himself. And I stood there afterward with his hands on my shoulders holding me at arm's length, and he couldn't even look at me, and I

DoveHe pulled me the whole way. Down the empty hall, through the door, his hand locked around my wrist and neither of us were speaking. And then the study door was shut behind me and he let go of me. He adjusted himself back in his pants, and he turned, and then I saw his face, and he was furious.Not cold. Not the flat dead nothing he'd worn at the table. This was heat. His chest was heaving, his jaw tight, and his composure lying in pieces."Why," he said, "are you making this so difficult.""Elio—""I have given you everything." His voice cracked out. "Money. Freedom. An open door. A way out with your whole life ahead of you and nobody in the world coming for you, and you keep—" He dragged a hand through his hair. "Why can't you just obey me? Why can't you do one thing I ask? Just leave. Leave. Why won't you leave?""Because I'm staying," I said. “I’m not breaking our original agreement. I have ninety days here.” I said it quietly, but steady, and certain. Immovable. And I watche

DoveI was still shaking when I heard his voice behind me, low and dark and amused."Did you just come without my permission, little bird?"I couldn't speak for a moment. I was undone, wrecked, my cheek against the cold table and my whole body still trembling with the aftershocks of it. When I finally found my words, they came out in a whisper."...Yes.""Yes what?""Yes, Master," I breathed. "I did."He straightened. And I felt the loss of him immediately, physically, as he pulled back and away. My body helplessly arched after him without my permission, missing the fullness of him, the weight, the him, and I made a small broken sound at the emptiness he left.He came around into my line of sight, unhurried, and crouched so his face was level with mine where it rested against the table. His eyes were dark and steady and terrible."Nothing happens in this room without my permission," he said quietly. "Not a breath. Not a sound. Certainly not that. Do you understand me?"I trembled. "Ye

DoveMy first night sleeping in the vault wasn’t as bad as I thought it’d be.There was a cot in there, a single bed, with decent mattress and a warm blanket Maria brought. She also brought me food, my laptop, some clothes, and that was about all of it. We didn’t say too many words to each other. Maria simply kept her head down in this room. Truly uncomfortable and bothered by it all. And maybe she even felt sorry for me, for my condition.Any normal person probably would, but I guess I’m not normal. Because I didn’t feel bad at all for being here. In fact, I enjoyed it.The next morning, after a shower, I started walking around the room. Noting and learning about the things that surrounded me. There were toys and tools of all sorts. Metallic balls in different sizes, dozens of different kinds of vibrators, little clamps of sorts, handcuffs and metal bars and so many others. And instead of being scared about the things I found, I was — excited. Thinking that Elio would be using these

DoveI had a routine now.That was the strangest part. I lived in a windowless room behind half a foot of steel and I had a routine.Mornings — I called them mornings, though there was no light in there to tell me — Maria let herself in with a tray. She was the only person who came. She brought coffee and something hot and clean clothes and took the old ones away, and she never asked me anything, and I never told her anything, and her face did all the talking. She looked at where I was living, and then she looked at me, and there was grief in it. But there was something else too, and I'd come to recognize it: she was checking whether I was all right. Not whether I was free. Whether I was all right.I always was. I think that frightened her.After that I worked. I did my coursework at a little table in the corner of a room designed for something else entirely, writing about counterpoint with a bruise on my hip and a leather crop hanging on the wall six feet away, and honestly, that con