Why Is Connection Prioritized Over Correction In Good Inside?

2025-11-13 11:26:33 283

4 Answers

Xanthe
Xanthe
2025-11-15 12:46:27
You know what surprised me about 'Good Inside'? How much it applies beyond parenting. At work, I used to jump straight into problem-solving mode when teammates made mistakes, which sometimes made them defensive. After reading the book, I started asking things like 'Walk me through your thought process?' first. Suddenly, collaboration improved! Dr. Becky’s principle works because correction without connection feels like an attack on competence. Whether with kids or adults, leading with empathy makes the other person feel partnered with, not punished. The book’s anecdotes about bedtime struggles or sibling fights all circle back to this: people change when they feel seen.
Spencer
Spencer
2025-11-16 10:41:23
I’ll admit, I initially rolled my eyes at 'connection over correction'—it sounded like another touchy-feely parenting trend. But 'Good Inside' won me over with neuroscience. Dr. Becky explains how stress hormones literally block learning pathways in kids’ brains. When we prioritize connection (hugs, eye contact, calm tones), it activates their prefrontal cortex instead. My 'aha' moment came during a grocery store meltdown: crouching to my nephew’s level and saying 'You really wanted those cookies, huh?' disarmed him faster than any timeout. The book argues that behavioral 'problems' are often unmet needs in disguise. Now I get why my teacher friend swears by greeting each student individually—it sets the stage for better focus all day.
Jack
Jack
2025-11-18 06:22:16
Dr. Becky Kennedy's 'good inside' really resonated with me because it flips the script on traditional parenting advice. Instead of focusing on fixing behaviors immediately, she emphasizes building a strong emotional bond first. The idea is that kids—and honestly, people in general—are more receptive to growth when they feel safe and understood. I noticed this with my niece; when I took time to listen to her frustration instead of scolding her tantrum, she calmed down faster and even apologized on her own later.

What’s brilliant is how this approach mirrors attachment theory in psychology. Connection creates a Foundation where correction doesn’t feel like rejection. The book gives examples like validating feelings ('You’re really upset right now') before guiding behavior ('Let’s find a kinder way to say that'). It’s not permissive parenting—it’s strategic. Kids learn self-regulation when their emotions aren’t treated as inconveniences. After trying these techniques, I finally understood why my parents’ 'because I said so' lectures never stuck like our heart-to-heart talks did.
Hudson
Hudson
2025-11-19 17:08:57
'Good Inside' made me rethink my whole approach to conflicts. Connection first isn’t about avoiding hard conversations—it’s about making them land. Dr. Becky compares it to defusing a bomb; you wouldn’t start yanking wires while the timer’s ticking! The book’s scripts for tantrums or lying all follow this pattern: name the emotion, offer safety, then redirect. It’s wild how differently my little cousin responds when I say 'I get why you hid that broken vase' versus 'You’re in trouble.' She once confessed to stealing markers after I joked, 'Bet you wished they were yours, huh?'
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