What Are Funny Relationship Breakup Quotes To Lighten The Mood?

When Roxy showed up at my engagement party to Ian, wearing a dress from the same collection as mine, I knew the marriage wasn’t going anywhere.  The daughter of a homewrecker, Roxy would steal Ian from me just like how her mother took my dad from my mother. However, I'm not letting her get away with it.  Before anybody knew, I trashed my own engagement party and skipped town. I was done playing games.

Thor and I grew up together—we were the definition of childhood sweethearts. We'd promised to attend the same university, graduate, and marry right after senior year. Everyone envied us. They said we were a perfect match, destined for a lifetime together. And I believed that too. I truly thought I'd spend the rest of my life with him. Until the final semester of our senior year in high school, when a new transfer student named Lina joined our class. At first, the two barely spoke. But as they grew familiar, their bond deepened in ways I could no longer ignore. He started staying after school to tutor her, bringing her breakfast every morning. When she was upset, he'd take her for a drive along the coast. If she craved Italian steak, he'd have fresh cuts flown in. Even during her period, he'd quietly prepare everything she needed. I was furious. I confronted him, argued with him, and even threatened to break up. The first time I said it, he thought I was joking and coaxed me out of my anger. The second time, he dismissed it as another tantrum and tried different ways to please me. The third time, he broke down—standing outside my house in the pouring rain all night, half kneeling before me, begging for forgiveness. Again and again, I tried to leave, and every time, he refused to let me go. Yet with each reconciliation, something in him shifted. He started taking me for granted, assuming I would always come back. His patience wore thin. His apologies turned perfunctory. Even when he came to make peace, there was no sincerity left in his voice. So I said it for the hundredth time, and that was the last. That was the moment I finally gave up on him.

*Abandoning ship isn’t my style. It wasn’t hers either, but our circumstances ripped us apart. Now it’s not just a literal ocean standing between us. Francine Chirilova has no direction. After coming out of the closet leaves her without a family at age 18, the quick witted 25 year old has been forced to survive on her connections and kind personality. Throw in a rapidly decreasing appetite and a tendency to gravitate toward abusive women for a epic shit show. While recovering from her latest 4 year long mistake, she makes a strong, yet unlikely connection with her virtual best friend. Que in recovering alcoholic Vasilisa Krovopuskova, aged 26 from Siberia, Russia. After surviving a grueling upbringing on her own, trust is a difficult concept to grasp. Already having experienced heartbreak once before, she wasn’t looking for anything serious when Francine crash landed into her life via an online sanctuary for lesbians. With an ocean separating the two, neither Francine nor Vasilisa know which direction to swim in. Will they stay on their side of the world, or drown trying to get to the other? *Disclaimer* - Strong mature content. 18+, please Book one. To follow is book two: “Our Blank Canvas.”

The five major mafia families in Neopolis had an unwritten rule. None of the core family members was allowed to marry a commoner, but the heir to the Colombo family, Adrian Colombo, had fallen in love with me. Adrian openly defied his family's committee for me but ended up being slapped a hundred times in public as his punishment. He was also forced to drink whiskey with glass pieces mixed into it. While getting his stomach pumped at the hospital, he smiled and comforted me, "Don't cry, Ella. I'm willing to accept any punishment as long as I can be with you." After that, Don Colombo finally agreed to let Adrian marry me, but on one condition. He had to give his family a new heir by having a child with his deceased older brother's fiancée and his sister-in-law, Cecelia Gambino. Adrian agreed to the terms in order to marry me. He told me that we could be together forever after Cecelia gave birth to an heir. After that, he slept with Cecelia 99 times until she was pregnant. I thought we could finally be together, but Adrian told me apologetically that Cecelia was pregnant with a girl. The heir of the Colombo family had to be a boy. So, he slept with Cecelia another hundred times before she was finally pregnant again. Just when I thought I could finally marry Adrian, his daughter with Cecelia ingested cyanide by accident, and everyone thought I was the culprit. I was forcefully sent to the convent for one year. Adrian looked at me angrily. "How could you hurt my daughter, Ella?! She's innocent! How could you be so cruel? I'm so disappointed in you." He did not believe me! I felt a sharp pain in my heart. It felt like it was being torn apart. I was suddenly reminded of how he had made a promise to me in front of God. "Ella, I swear I will only love you in this life." When he was punished by his family for me, he said, "Ella, I'm willing to suffer any punishment just to be with you." Every time we slept together, he would kiss me over and over. "Don't leave me, Ella, or I'll die." However, when he stood next to Cecelia and carried their daughter in his arms, they looked like a real family of three. I was suddenly tired of everything. Adrian, from now onward, your name would never again appear in my prayers. From now onward, we would live as though we had never met each other and we had never been in love. I would set you free.

Year Malkame returns to her hometown after ten years of exile. She came back following pieces of a puzzle she really needed to find in order to meet her Secret santa, the man or woman who had been gifting her lonely childhood Christmases with joy and music. Being sent away from her home at the age of fourteen, she had lost the trail of the person she was looking for. But now, she wants to finally find him. But in her journey, she finds her childhood best friend Justin. A misfortune leaves her under the same roof with this man. What happens when long-time friends come together after ten years? What happens when she realizes who her secret santa is? And what the hell happens when a billionaire decides he suddenly wants her to not only work for him but also be his woman?

After five years of dating, my girlfriend, Rachel Meyers, cancels our wedding 52 times. The first time, her intern, Ethan Cole, messes up a form at the law firm where she works. She rushes back to fix it, leaving me stranded on the beach for the entire day. The second time, during the wedding ceremony, she hears that Ethan is being bullied by another attorney. She abandons everything to help him, leaving me to become the laughingstock of our guests. After that, no matter when we hold the wedding, Ethan always seems to have some kind of emergency that demands her attention. Eventually, I grow numb and decide to break up with her. But on the day I move out of Westerbay, Rachel loses her mind trying to find me.