Novels by ituafavour82

The hotel in London was small and old.Cracked walls. Creaky floors. A window that looked out onto a narrow street. Jay stood by the window and watched the rain fall. The sky was gray. The buildings were wet. The city was quiet. He didn't know what he was feeling. Excitement. Fear. Something in between.Cole came up behind him. He put his arms around Jay's waist."What are you thinking?""That I'm here. London. The gallery. It's real.""It's real.""I don't know if I'm ready."Cole turned him around. "You're ready.""What if I'm not?""Then you fake it."Jay laughed. "That's not helpful.""It's not supposed to be helpful. It's supposed to be true."The gallery was in South Kensington.White walls. High ceilings. Track lighting. Jay's paintings were already on the walls. Thirty-five pieces. Figures in fields. Men on hills. Women by the water. People standing in the light. The man on the bridge. The woman in the crowded street. The man in the dark room with the window.Jay walked throug

Jay couldn't sleep.He lay in bed staring at the ceiling. London. Another city. Another show. Another thirty-five paintings. His mind was racing. He couldn't turn it off. He couldn't slow it down.Cole was asleep next to him. His breathing was steady. His arm was draped across Jay's chest. Jay didn't move. He didn't want to wake him.He stared at the ceiling until the sky outside turned from black to gray. Then he got up.He walked to the kitchen. He made coffee. He sat at the table. He stared at the wall.Cole found him an hour later."Jay," Cole said. His voice was rough with sleep."I'm here.""You're up early.""Couldn't sleep."Cole sat next to him. "Thinking about London?""Thinking about everything."Cole reached for his hand. "You don't have to decide today.""I know.""But you're going to think about it anyway."Jay nodded. "I'm going to think about it anyway."Jay went to the studio that morning.The room was empty. The walls were bare. He stood in the middle of it and turne

The flight to New York was long.Jay sat by the window. Cole sat next to him. The plane lifted off. The city shrank below them. Jay pressed his face to the glass. He watched until the buildings disappeared. Then he watched the clouds. Then he watched nothing at all."You're quiet," Cole said."I'm thinking.""About the show?""About everything."Cole reached over. He took Jay's hand. "We're going to be okay.""We?""Us. Together. Always."Jay squeezed his hand. "I love you."Cole squeezed back. "I know."The hotel was in Manhattan.Tall building. Small room. A view of the skyline. Jay stood by the window. The city was sprawling below him. Millions of people. Millions of faces. And soon, they would all be looking at his work.Cole came up behind him. He put his arms around Jay's waist."What are you thinking?""That I'm here. New York. The gallery. It's real.""It's real.""I don't know if I'm ready."Cole turned him around. "You're ready.""What if I'm not?""Then you fake it."Jay la

The New York exhibition was three weeks away.Jay stood in the empty studio. The canvases were gone. The walls were bare. The paint was dry on his hands. He had twenty-five pieces on their way to the city that never slept. He had nothing left to do. His hands felt empty. His mind felt quiet. He didn't know what to do with himself.Cole found him standing in the middle of the room."You're staring at the wall," Cole said."I'm thinking.""About what?""The show. The paintings. Everything."Cole walked over. "It's done.""Not yet. It's not done until the opening night.""The paintings are done. The work is done. The rest is out of your hands."Jay turned to face him. "That's supposed to make me feel better?""It's supposed to be true."Jay went home that afternoon.He sat on the couch. He stared at the wall. The silence was heavy. He wanted to paint. He wanted to create. But he didn't know what to make.Cole sat next to him. "What are you thinking about?""The New York show. The waiting

Jay didn't sleep that night.He lay in bed staring at the ceiling. New York. The biggest stage in the country. His work on those walls. The thought was too big. Too heavy. He couldn't hold it in his head.Cole was asleep next to him. His breathing was steady. His arm was draped across Jay's chest. Jay didn't move. He didn't want to wake him.He stared at the ceiling until the sky outside the window turned from black to gray. Then he got up.He walked to the kitchen. He made coffee. He sat at the table. He stared at the wall.Cole found him an hour later."Jay," Cole said. His voice was rough with sleep."I'm here.""You're up early.""Couldn't sleep."Cole sat next to him. "Thinking about New York?""Thinking about everything."Cole reached for his hand. "You don't have to decide today.""I know.""But you're going to think about it anyway."Jay nodded. "I'm going to think about it anyway."Jay went to the studio that morning.The room was empty. The walls were bare. He stood in the m

The morning after the Chicago opening, Jay woke up to sunlight streaming through the hotel window and Cole's arm wrapped around his waist.He lay still for a long time. His chest was light. His mind was quiet. The weight that had been sitting on him for weeks had finally lifted. He didn't know why. He didn't question it. He just let himself feel it.Cole stirred behind him."You're awake," Cole mumbled."I'm awake.""What time is it?""Late."Cole pulled him closer. "Good. Stay here."Jay smiled. "I'm not going anywhere."They had breakfast in the hotel cafe.Pancakes. Coffee. Fresh fruit. Jay ate slowly. He didn't rush. He didn't think about the show. He didn't think about the paintings. He just ate.Cole watched him."What?" Jay asked."Nothing.""You're staring.""I'm looking.""It's the same thing.""It's not.""It is."Jay laughed. "You're impossible."Cole grinned. "You love it."Jay looked at him. "I do."The phone rang at 10am. Elena."Jay," she said. "How are you?""Good. Tir