Chapter 6 To Family

Ryder’s POV

It's quiet; it almost feels like I'm in her cottage, but I'm not. It doesn't smell like her. This place isn't decorated with her touch. I don't see her everywhere I look. Her garden isn't outside; nothing of her is here except the things of hers I brought with me. I look at them spread out in my office. I don't know how long I've been standing here looking at them. It feels like minutes, but I know it's been hours. 

My heart aches; everything in me screams to go back to where she is. I know she told me she was not there anymore, but to me, she is. She was the color on the walls, the flowers in the vases. She was the vegetables in her garden and the yellow shutters against the sage green house. She was everything and everywhere. I existed in her world. She was my world, but my world is now gone. How do I go on without her? I feel so lost. My purpose is almost gone. It was Angelica and Azalea. Angelica is gone, and Azalea will be 18 soon. Soon, she'll be gone as well, off living her own life. 

I'm not sure what I'll do when she goes off on her own. I'm sure I'll go back to Angelica's cottage. It's the only way I can be near her. Even my wolf is urging me to go there.  

He's been depressed since we got here. He can no longer shift when I go to sleep and sleep on her grave each night. I didn't realize he was doing it until I woke up naked on her grave one morning. I assumed it was a one-time thing until Azalea told me she had seen him sleeping on her Mother's grave many mornings and many nights. 

Now, he can't do that. She's too far away. 

I blinked my eyes and shook my head at the sound of a knock at the door. It was then that I realized my face was soaked. 

I wiped my face and cleared my throat as I walked down the hall toward the door. When I opened it, I wasn't surprised to find Michael on the other side. 

“Come on, I'm not leaving you cooped up in this apartment again, and I'm not taking no for an answer,” Michael said as he grabbed my wrist and pulled me from my apartment. 

I groaned and didn't even bother trying to take my hand back. I allowed the idiot to pull me along with him.

“Where are you taking me?” I asked when he dragged me to the first floor, away from the kitchen and front door. 

“I'm taking you to have some fun,” Michael said, and I rolled my eyes at his shitty job of answering my question. 

My question was answered when he dragged me down the stairs to the basement. The music became louder as we neared the bottom of the stairs, and the sound of a cue ball breaking a racked set echoed as we reached the bottom. 

As we turned and entered the basement, my eyes scanned the room, and I was surprised to see everyone there. 

Michael, Asher, Anders, Mark, Thaddeus, Aiden, Grayson, Sebastian, Ezra, Roman, Reid, and Julian were in the game room. 

All the omegas and Sebastian were sitting around a table near the back playing cards while the rest played pool.

The ones who weren't playing sat at the high-top table along the wall with their drinks. Reid puffed on a cigar while nursing a can of Dr Pepper, and Thaddeus sipped his bourbon. 

Ezra growled at Asher when he laughed as he scratched the cue ball. 

Anders turns after making his shot, and he smiles when his eyes land on me. 

“Ry! Damn, it's so good to see you!” Anders said as he approached and pulled me into a hug.

As I hugged Anders, I realized how much I missed everyone. As soon as Anders moved away, Thaddeus pulled me into a bone-crushing hug that was almost painful. 

“Come have a drink! I brought down the good stuff. Maker's Mark private selection,” Thaddeus said as he swung his arm around my shoulder and led me toward their table. 

I chuckled and shook my head. Nothing had changed about the old man. After all these years, he's still drinking the same stuff. I thought and laughed harder, which earned me a curious look from the Alpha.

“I just found it funny that you're still drinking the same stuff.”

“Hell yeah, I am! Ain't nothing better!” Thaddeus said and slapped my shoulder a little too hard before parting and sitting down. 

“I like Detroit city's butcher-cut bourbon.” Anders said before taking his next shot. His lips tugged up when he made his shot. He winked at Mark before taking his next shot and smiling triumphantly when it went in. 

“I like Doc Holliday. Talk about smooth!” Asher said, licking his lips as if he had just had a taste.

“Y'all wasting your money on that expensive shit! Just give me some Captain Morgan and cream soda! Twisty cream sodas is what it's all about!” Said a soft, rough voice from the back of the room that was all too familiar.

I was almost in my seat when I heard his voice. I stood and scanned the room, trying to figure out where he was.

“He's back there laying down,” Asher said as he pointed to the couch behind the table where the Omegas were sitting. As I got closer, I saw someone lying on the couch, tucked in with a fluffy comforter.

My heart clenched when my eyes landed on Noah. He didn't look any better than he did when I first got here. In fact, he looked worse. His pale skin, which usually had a rose tint behind it, lacked the rose tint. His skin lacked color, and he looked lifeless. 

I grabbed a chair and pulled it over before sitting down next to him. I looked at the Omega, who I still see as my Luna and my heart broke. I'm not used to seeing him like this. I'm used to seeing him full of life, cocky and speaking his mind, not lying here looking like he's on death's door.

“Hey, how are you feeling?”

“Like shit! Alpha jerk won't let me drink, and neither will Alpha jerk number 2!” Noah said with a pout, and I laughed. 

“There's my Luna,” I said as I roughed my fingers through his hair. 

Noah gave me a weak smile before pointing at the table next to his head.

“Can you hand me my water? My throat's dry.”

“Sure,” I said, propping his head up and then handing him his water. 

My stomach dropped when I saw his hands shaking as he reached for his cup. It dropped even further when I noticed he had difficulty bringing the straw to his mouth. I quickly reached forward and directed the straw into his mouth.

Once Noah had his fill, he handed me the cup, and I set it down. I frowned as I pushed his hair away from his eyes. 

“You need a haircut!”

“I need to get laid; that's what I need!” Noah said, and Michael coughed as he sat down on the couch at Noah's feet. He lifted the Omega's feet, put them in his lap, and began squeezing and massaging them.

“Boy, even on your deathbed, that's all you can think of,” I joked. 

“I'm not on my deathbed. I'm just pretending to be sick to get sympathy from these guys. I was hoping they’d put on a show for me if I looked sick enough. Maybe strip each other, watch Michael take Asher in the ass again, something good like that, ya know,” Noah said, and Asher choked on his bourbon. It sprayed across the table and showered Reid's face. 

“Who'd he hit with that?” Noah asked with a devilish grin.

I laughed and shook my head. 

“I'm glad to see you're still yourself,” I said, and Noah closed his eyes as I kissed his forehead. 

“Get some rest,” I said as I stood. As soon as I stood, Noah reached for Michael and made grabby hands at him like a child.

A soft smile spread across Michael's face as he squeezed in beside Noah and wrapped his arms around him. 

“Kiss me so I can at least taste the bourbon,” Noah said as I walked away, and I laughed. That Omega never fails to make me laugh.

As I walked past the Omegas, I roughed my fingers through Mark's hair, and he looked up at me with a smile. 

“Hey Ry! It's good to see you,” He said as he stood, reaching for me. My heart melted as I leaned down and hugged him.

As he pulled away from the hug, Mark looked up at me with a smile, and I felt that familiar feeling as if she was here. For the first time, I realized that she was here. All that time we shared in the pack house before we moved to her cottage was always with Asher, Michael, Noah, Anders, and Mark. The seven of us were together almost every day. We worked together and ate together. We let our wolves run together. We were a family. 

I turned back, looked at Michael, and smiled when I saw him nuzzling Noah's face. She's here, everywhere in this room; she is with everyone. 

I felt my chest stutter and my eyes burn as I tried to keep the tears back. I somewhat managed, but I'm sure it was noticeable. 

When I sat down, Reid was still glaring at Asher while drying his face. I laughed as I grabbed a glass and poured myself two fingers of bourbon. I held my glass up and let my eyes roam the room. 

“To family,” I said, and I wasn't the least bit embarrassed that my voice cracked. 

“TO FAMILY!” everyone said at once before clinking their glasses together and taking a sip.