Chapter 11

Selena’s POV

“SELENA!”

Nia’s loud voice sliced through the thoughts loud and sharp, and it snapped me back to reality like ice water had been poured on my skin. I jumped lightly, and I was blinking very fast, like maybe if I blinked fast enough, I would forget the dream. My chest was very tight, and I quickly threw my hands behind me, curling my fingers. 

Nia narrowed her eyes, suspicious like always. “What are you hiding?”

“Nothing,” I said quickly, way too quickly, and I hated how my voice shook.

Of course, Nia didn’t buy it. She reached forward very fast and pulled my hand back from where I hid it, before I could even stop her. My stomach twisted like knots were being tied inside it. Immediately her eyes looked at the red scratches on my hand, her lips pressed into a thin line and her eyes became wide open. 

Ava who had not said anything since, she was standing at the corner watching us silently. Then she finally spoke as she held my hand, she turned it around to see all the scratches and she frowned. The way she touched me was warm, and almost too soft, compared to the way my skin was stinging me. 

“When did this happen?” Ava asked, her voice low but full of worry.

I swallowed hard, and I was searching inside my brain for an excuse that I would give. Then like a light bulb turned on untop of my head, I said the first thing that I could think of. “Earlier, when I was arranging my clothes in the wardrobe. My hand scratched against the wood.” 

I said the words very smoothly like it was a script that I had been rehearsing for a long time now. And it sounded too perfect. My heartbeat became faster, but my face?… I managed to keep it together. 

Even me that had said it, I could not believe that I could say something that brilliant and realistic right now that my brain could not really process things. 

And no matter how good it sounded, Nia was not even convinced by it. She still gave me that look, the one that says ‘I know you’re lying but I’ll pretend like I believe you’. Then she said. “I don’t believe that,” she murmed in a low voice, and her eyes narrowed even more. “But I’ll pretend like I believe you.” 

I exhaled shakily. That was the closest thing to mercy I’d get from her.

“Come with me,” Ava said firmly. She didn’t ask, she commanded.

And before I knew it, she was helping me to come down from my bed. She led me to where the chair was, somewhere near the window like I was a delicate or fragile thing that was so close to breaking. She knelt down in my front and her hands were still holding my hands in my laps. Her eyes looked into mine and the way she looked I could already tell that she had so many questions to ask, so many questions that I was not ready to answer. 

Then Nia dragged another chair and sat down beside us, she crossed her hands on her chest like she was a judge and all she wanted to do was to pass sentence. 

Ava’s voice turned into another tone, it was not more soft, not even gentle. “Now you have to tell us what the nightmare is about. And you don’t get to lie.” 

The way her voice sounded, made me flinch even more than what she had said. Ava had never been strict to me, but seeing her like this, right now, almost made me scared. And I knew that she was damn serious now. 

“Umm…” I started, stalling, trying to buy myself time.

“Uh-huh.” Ava cut me off immediately, like she knew my brain was already forming another excuse.

She tilted her chin up, eyes sharp. “Tell me exactly what happened.”

The truth about the whole thing weighed on my chest heavily. I wanted to try and push it away, maybe lie again but I could not do that. At least not now that Ava was looking at me like she wanted to open my head and take the truth out of it, if that was what it meant. 

So I told them.

Not all of it—never all of it. I left out the most dangerous detail. I didn’t tell them the guy in the dream was Cullen. Instead, I said I didn’t see his face. That it was just shadows, heat, and fear.

Nia slammed her hand against the chair arm, her jaw tightening. “It’s Jake,” she snapped. Anger dripped from her voice like venom.

“It’s not Jake,” I said quickly, maybe too quickly.

Ava’s sharp gaze turned suspicious. “So how did you know it was not Jake if you did not see his face?”

My chest started burning again, and I started looking for what to say again. “It did not look like him, at least.” The way the words even came out from my mouth, shaky and rushed, you’ll know that maybe I was lying but that was the best I could do to cover it up right now. 

Nia scoffed. “Then it’s Jake.” She said it like it was law, like one could argue with her and still win.

I didn’t argue further. Sometimes silence was safer than truth.

Ava let out a really long breathe, then she rested her head on my lap like a child that was looking for some form of comfort. Her hair brushed on my hand and I froze, I didn’t know what to do. She did not move thigh, she just stayed there like she did not know what to do with me at this point, but she knew that she had to do something one way or the other. 

Then finally she stood up from where she was and pulled my hand to come with her. She didn’t say anything again, she just walked to her bed, and pushed me lightly to sit down on it. She covered me with the blankets, and she didn’t need to say anything before Nia climbed the bed too, and I layed in their middle, with their warmth pressing me like a shield from both sides. 

I was there— Sandwiched. Protected. Smothered.

And for the first time in a very long time, I did not feel alone. 

The next morning came very fast, even before I knew that I had slept off. 

The light that was spilling into the room from the curtain, had not even stretched to the pint of touching my face when I opened my eyes. My friends were still sleeping and their hands were around me like they were trying to shield me. I didn’t move immediately and I laid there looking up at the ceiling like it had the answers that I was looking for. But I knew one thing, that I had made up my mind. 

I had one mission today. Find Cullen.

The thought alone made my stomach twist, but it was stronger than fear. Stronger than hesitation.

I carefully removed their hands from my body. Nia mumbled something in her sleep and Ava stirred, but I managed to get away without waking them up, thank God. I immediately felt guilty, because I know that if they woke up and I was not there, they’d start getting worried. But I could not handle the questions they will ask me, at lest not today. 

I dressed quickly, pulling on a hoodie. My sleeves were long enough to hide my hand, and I tugged the hood over my head. One deep breath, then another.

And then I walked.

The hallway of Cullen’s dorm stretched out in front of me, a place I had sworn I’d never come to again. My sneakers were brushing faintly on the polished tile, every step I took was echoing in my ears and my chest was tightening. 

Still, I walked.

Finally, I stopped at the doors. His doors. My pulse pounded in my ears, my stomach sinking. I hesitated, my fist hovering just an inch away. For a moment, I almost turned back.

But no.

I raised my knuckles and knocked.

The door creaked open.

And there he was.

Standing there shirtless, the early morning light tracing the hard lines of his chest, his hair messy like he’d just rolled out of bed. His eyes widened slightly when he saw me, but not as much as mine did.

I froze.