Chapter 11: MOI

I've been waiting foolishly for Jaxon to turn up, for him to crack my window open and scare the shit out of me before apologizing. Granting me that saving grace that I was just overreacting, falling victim to my delusions. That the voices in my head were all wrong.

I wanted him to save me from myself. The same self that had been ruthlessly hanging unto the delusions that there would always be an us.

Stupid.

Stupid

Stupid.

I've been waiting and waiting foolishly for something that will never come.

Rider's words are still fresh in my mind, Jax is not himself. I know that, but that still doesn't make this heartache any easier. Actually, it doesn't excuse it.

Does this altered personality of his also affect the way he treats others?

He killed his pack mates, my mind reminds me.

Yes, but... But that was different that was war-

Still no excuse. Their life was not his to take.

I hang my head. This was toxic. I trusted Jaxon with my heart. I trusted that he wouldn't hurt me, that whe