Chapter 6: Hollow Ache

Regina’s POV

These past three months, I’ve been drifting through a haze I couldn’t escape. I knew what they were putting in my arm. They called it “medicine” but I knew better. It didn’t matter how many times I screamed, fought back, or begged that I was pregnant. All my cries fell on deaf ears.

No one stopped them. No one listened.

I don’t even know who gave orders. Was it Maxwell? Morgana? Or someone else entirely?

Through it all, I held onto one fragile truth: the baby was still growing inside of me. I could feel the weight, the shifting inside me, the tiny movements that reassured me that even though I was all alone, I still had someone to hold on to.

But the sting of every injection made me afraid. What if I ruined the life of my own child the same way I ruined everything else?

Still, the craving for the piercing needle and the haze that followed afterwards was stronger than all my fears.

I hated myself for it.

I did everything to fight the want. I clawed at my skin, bit my lip until it bled, and prayed through clenched teeth.

None of it worked.

The drugs were much louder than the voice in my head telling me to hold on.

Most of my time was spent sleeping. It was easier than being awake and feeling the need, the want, for the needle zinging through my veins.

Pathetic.

When I woke up, everything was wrong.

The air was sterile. Cold. Not the soft scent of sheets or the dimness of my usual room.

Panic surged before any other thought could catch up.

I tried to get up. My arms jerked out instinctively, reaching for something, or someone.

But they hit nothing. No hand to grasp. No voice to sooth.

Just the silence and the groan of the metal table below me. 

I couldn’t move at all. Not even an inch.

My limbs were heavy and my eyes hazy. When my vision cleared a bit, my eyes fell on Maxwell.

“Proceed with the surgery,” his voice rang out suddenly, clearing through the haze. “Take the baby out of her.”

Something deep inside of me cracked.

Weakly, I opened my mouth, trying to scream, No, please don’t do that! Not my baby!

But the only thing that came out was a weak groan.

Even my own body betrayed me.

Doctors swarmed around me. A mask covered my face. Anesthesia.

And then... nothing.

Nothing except for the sound of beeping machines and betrayal echoing into the dark.

Next time I woke up, I knew something was wrong.

There was a hollow ache in my belly. It was too light. There was no movement as well.

My arms instinctively curled over the space that held my child.

Panic surged through my veins faster than any drug they had ever injected.

Then it came back to me.

Maxwell’s voice. Take the baby out of her. Cold and clear. No hesitation.

“No,” I whispered, breath catching in my throat as my world upended right in front of me.

My hands trembled as I tried to push myself upright, but my limbs were weak. Useless.

My body screamed in protest, but my mind was louder. I had to find my child.

That’s when I heard her voice.

“Well, well, well. Look who’s awake.” Morgana stepped into the room, arms folded across her chest, along with a vicious smirk curling her lips. “You’re really pathetic, you know that?”

I paid her no mind. “Where’s my baby?” I rasped, heart thudding so hard I thought it might break through my ribs.

She went on, looking me dead in the eye. “He didn’t want your baby. You think Maxwell would want a drug addict’s child?”

It felt like being slapped in the face with the truth. My chest tightened.

“No,” I whispered. “No, no, no, no...” I said until my voice cracked and I could no longer go on.

“Yes,” Morgana said with a cruel gleam in her eyes. “He made sure it was taken care of.”

Something inside of me broke. I screamed until I was hoarse and swung my legs off the bed, not caring about the pain or the IV ripping from my arm.

“I want to see my baby!” I cried out as I fell to the floor, trying to get off the bed.

Morgana rolled her eyes and pointed down the hall. “Go on, then. You’ll see for yourself.”

I pushed myself until I was on my hands and knees, crawling my way toward the direction she’d gestured. My gown trailed behind me. My feet were bare and bloodless as I took support from a wall and stood on shaky knees.

One step forward and I nearly fell before reaching the door.

My heart pounded with hope, but there was also terror.

I shoved it open.

The room was empty. There was nothing. Not a cradle, not a cry.

Just... nothing.

Silence. Except for the door slamming shut behind me.

I collapsed to the floor, choking on the sob that tore out of me.

He took my baby. Maxwell took my baby.

The sudden shriek of the fire alarm broke through the silence like a knife. Chaos erupted everywhere. Sounds of shouting and thudding footsteps, the unmistakable crackle of flames.

“Fire!” someone screamed.

I heard a door slam.

I flinched, and then it finally caught up to me.

There was a fire.

I scrambled to my feet and rushed to the door, twisting the handle, slamming my shoulder into it. It wouldn’t open. It was locked. Panic surged in my throat as I pounded against it with every ounce of strength left in me.

“Help!”  I cried, my voice hoarse, useless.

No one came.

My fists fell to my sides. I backed away from the door and sank to the floor, trembling. Smoke seeped in through the cracks, curling like fingers around my legs. My lungs burned.

Maybe this was how it ended.

Maybe it was better this way.

I had no child. No answers. No one believed me. Whatever love Maxwell and I once had was buried beneath all the lies. Maybe this fire, this oblivion, was the only thing that made sense anymore.

My eyelids fluttered. The smoke was thick, clinging to everything, stealing breath. The edges of the room blurred.

Then I heard it.

“Regina!.”

My eyes snapped open.

Maxwell?

His voice broke through the fog, raw with panic and pleading, as if wanting nothing more than to drag me back from the edge.  But it didn’t make sense. Why would he be here? Didn’t he hate me? Didn’t he already take everything from me?

I opened my mouth to call him, but no sound came.

Maybe my death was the only way to set them all free.

And then the fire swallowed the whole room.