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I COULDN'T BELIEVE where I was standing. Couldn't believe where I was standing, and that I didn't want to be here.
The Shade Mansion. A place I had once called home but was now was just a standing reminder of betrayal and lies. I was once as proud of this business as my father was, but now that I knew what happened inside, how lives were ruined, I wanted nothing to do with it.
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All Things Lovely 49
JUSTIN THOUGHT QUICKLY and opened the door, pulling me inside with him into the darkness. The door clicked shut just as voices were heard.The two men were now talking just outside the door, and it was nerve-wracking. Every word of theirs seemed dragged, like a YouTube video playing at 0.75 speed. They could open the door at any time—which really wasn't helping my anxiety.The closet was dark and musty with a slight reek. It was almost pitch dark—I was only just able to see Justin's silhouette from where I stood a few feet away from him."It'll be alright," he said, and although people usually lied when they said that, I believed him for a blissful second.I hadn't noticed, but I was breathing hard, almost gasping. I ran my hands along the wall to look for a light switch, and when I found one, I flicked it on immediately, leaning against the wall. The people were still outside.The bulb was faulty and only sputtered light unsteadily, but I would take what I could get to shove away the
All Things Lovely 50
SNEAKING OUT HAD been very stressful. Especially when Parker decided that it would be wise to stand in the middle of a wide and commonly used hallway to admire the smoothness of the walls."I'm telling you," he had said seriously, "it's unnatural for walls to be this smooth."After a series of failed explanations on how we didn't have time to look at walls, Justin ended up losing it and dragged Parker behind him by the collar.I thought about it-about the incident in the closet and came to the conclusion that I had wanted him to kiss me. It was the first time I had acknowledged it.Then I found myself wondering if it was the right thing. I wanted it, but it wouldn't be right. It would make things messy, and I didn't want to start anything that ended in heartbreak. I couldn't see a future in whatever what going on with us. If I managed to score my dream job, I would have to work hard-I would even have to travel, if necessary.But I couldn't have Justin next to me through all that. I und
All Things Lovely 51
"WHAT'S WRONG?" he asked, voice filled with concern. And it seemed so genuine."It's nothing," I said with as much nonchalance as I could muster. I opened the door and got out of the car, aiming to go inside, but Justin, apparently, had other plans.Shocker."What is it, Autumn?" He was blocking my way, just as I reached the porch. He walked forward until we were almost touching. His fingers skimmed my cheek, making my throat run dry.I took a not-so-subtle step back."What makes you think something's wrong?" I looked away from his face, because I knew that if I did, everything else would peel away, layer by layer, until it was just the two of us-vulnerable and too overwhelmed with desire to think straight. I didn't trust myself when it was just the two of us."Are you serious? There's clearly something wrong, I just don't know why you won't talk to me about it."."I don't want to," I blurted out.He froze, and then moved closer, tilting my chin up to look at him. His blue eyes were ic
All Things Lovely 52
I WAS FLOATING.There was no other way I could explain it. I felt like I was floating, drifting with a summer wind. I stared up the ceiling for so long after I fell into bed, that I could swear it moved at one point. Or maybe I was just giddy from happiness.I covered my face with my hands, smiling into them like an idiot. I couldn't stop smiling, damnit.In that moment I hadn't thought of the consequences or everything that could go wrong, and it sure as hell had felt good to forget, even if for a moment.I liked Justin. There was no denying that, now. He knew it, too. I just hoped he didn't regret it. Because that would probably be something I couldn't bear. I was too invested in this to have it end as something unrequited.A knock on my door, almost made me jump out of my skin. It could only be one person outside given that Drake and Parker had already gone to bed by the time Justin and I had come back in.I cleared my throat. "Come in!"Justin wasted no time doing so, shutting the
All Things Lovely 53
THE NEXT MORNING was quite like the previous one. I had kick Justin out of my room before Drake or Parker woke up, and then I went to work on time for the first time in very long time. Rita was shocked at my early appearance and had made sure I heard the mocking in her 'good morning'.Downtown Diner was full for the first time in ages, and I was glad to find something to distract myself with. It had been boring working here for the past few days.The only new things I could have done in here a few days ago to excite myself would have been shifting from the bar stool to the diner chairs.There was a time that I would have thought getting paid for doing nothing at all would be a dream, but now I sure as hell didn't.Except for the fact that I almost dumped a bowl of soup on a customer's head and had a mental breakdown when someone rapped out a really complicated order to me, everything was fine.Josh walked in at noon, looking glum. He had bags under his eyes and his shoulders were slump
All Things Lovely 54
I HAD STAYED up all night, working on my applications for different grad schools and scholarships. There were many institutes that offered the highest master's degree for journalism. The deadlines were close, and I mentally beat myself up for not turning in my applications earlier.Luckily, Stony Brook University was offering a scholarship, picking the winners by their past records and merits along with a thousand-word essay on why they wanted the job, and other secondary questions provided.The blinds were closed, the weak morning light trying to seep through the translucent curtains. I liked working in the dark. It was a comfort of sorts, even though the screen of my laptop had been blinding when I had first opened it.I had grown accustomed to the quiet of the dark room and empty house – that's why I started when my phone's ringtone blared through room unapologetically."Hi," I said, still breathless from having been startled."What are you doing still awake? I left, like, an hour a
All Things Lovely 55
HE GOT OFF of the couch he had planted himself on, wincing as his feet touched the ground, which usually happened when you'd been sitting for too long, and I suspected that part of the reason he didn't want me to see what was on that drive was that it would require him to go retrieve it.I sat down in his spot just to taunt him."What does it have? Files? Emails?" I questioned Parker, my curiosity getting the best of me when Drake hadn't come back for a long time.Justin chuckled like he knew I would crack, and I elbowed him. Parker spared a curious glance before turning his attention back to what I asked."It's CCTV footage. Blurry, but evidence indeed," he said.I wondered why my father would have committed murder knowing he would be captured on a camera. He couldn't have been that stupid. Even if there were cameras, he would have seen to it that the footage was completely obliterated.Parker seemed to catch onto the silent question, because he answered, "William had set the cameras
All Things Lovely 56
WHITE WAS A depressing color, I'd decided. It was too empty, too constricted. It wasn't the best color to be around when someone wanted to know something for certain. The entire hospital was white, and the longer I stared, the more I thought—something I really didn't want to do now because my thoughts were my safe place no longer.I was at the verge of losing my mind and running out of the hospital screaming when Justin finally came around the corner. He was still wearing the same clothes, although they were crumpled now. His blue eyes looked dull and tired."She's fine," he said hollowly. He even sounded tired. He sat down in the chair next to me, which was also frustratingly white.The relief that flowed through me was like a drug—calming, numbing and decreasing the pressure in my chest until it was only a dull throb of dread for what I knew I had to do next. "I need to talk to you," I said, voice low enough to not be heard by the people seated around us.Justin sensed it—the strai
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