After Her

H E R A

The mere idea of never baking again makes me feel down. Baking, along with my children, is what brings me joy. It helped me get through tough times when I was a new mom with two crying newborns.

They would sleep, but I couldn't, so I turned to baking to calm my mind and emotions. It was something just for me, not involving my kids.

I know it sounds awful, but there was a moment when I resented them. I was depressed, crying every night. I didn't want to get out of bed when they cried. If they cried, I cried. I felt lost as a mom, wanting to give up.

I hated that I felt like they took something from me. Even in that hate, I still loved them. It was a conflicting feeling, but baking gave me something for myself. It helped me heal, and eventually, my babies healed me too.

My mental state improved, and I realized I only needed myself and my twins. My phone interrupts my thoughts, reminding me to pick up Addison and Aiden from daycare.

Have I been cleaning for that long? Where did t