Chapter 6: A Luna

Lucien's POV

"A Luna?" I half-yelled, the word coming out of my mouth like some kind of abomination.

Peter didn't flinch. He sat across from me in the office, calm as ever, his fingers laced loosely on his laps, like he had not just started a fire in a room soaked with gasoline. "Yes."

I stared at him a for a moment too long. The idea just wasn't unexpected, it was irritating, infuriating.

"Why the hell would I need a Luna right now?" I asked, keeping my tone even, but though the weight behind it was impossible to miss. "I have enough shit to deal with already. I have a whole pack testing me, I have people waiting for me to fail. The last thing I need now is a doll dressed up in flowers and shiny nails."

Peters lips quirkied up in both amusement and patience. He was the only one that could barge into my privacy any time and tell me shit like this.

I had known him since forever. He was my father's closest friend, and after my father's death, he practically raised me. He was the one that convinced Alpha Gideon to keep me as his Gamma, instead of... killing me. I let out a breath as I forced those wicked memories to the back of my mind like unwanted ghosts scratching out at a locked door.

"You should think about it. A Luna will do so much for you than you think. You need some kind of balance, Lucien."

"Balance?"

He nodded once. "You are too chaotic. And I don't blame you for it. I know what you have been through, what you have endured more than anyone." He shook his head slightly, a distant look in his eyes as if he too was recalling those memories. "You need someone to keep you grounded."

The fuck?

"I don't need that."

"I am certain even you don't believe it. Take a look at you. If your enemies don't destroy you, your rage will."

That made me swallow back my next words. Rage had become my armor. I wore it like a second skin, and sometimes even a crown.

"Listen, Lucien. You are the Alpha now and people are watching. Don't just take the pack as the price of your revenge. Lead your people well. Your father would want that."

That seemed to hit somewhere deep.

"Find yourself a Luna. Someone you can tolerate and not end up frustrating with your unending temper tantrums. Someone that knows about the pack life, politics, and someone willing to build with you."

The first person that came to my mind was Davina. But I knew that was out of the question. Far, far out.

Apart from her, I had not really gotten involved with any woman. My life was too chaotic for that.

"And when you eventually find a Luna, make an heir. You have fought for so long to get here, so preserve your bloodline."

My jaw ticked, knowing that he was right.

"Even the other Alphas will respect you more when you start making a family. Don't rule like you have nothing else to lose. Lead like you have everything and you can't afford to lose any."

He stood up, signalling that he was done with me. "Choose wisely though. Because the wrong Luna can destroy you faster than the might of every pack combined together."

And I thought about her again— Davina. Only that, in this case, I would be the one to destroy her.

The rest of the day passed with me stuck, thinking about that the possibility of getting a Luna. I still hated the idea like rot under clean flesh. It itched, gnawed, lingered.

To make it worse, Peter had to tell Rowan, who of course thought it was a brilliant idea. He came to find me in my office, positive that he could find someone for me.

Unlike me, Rowan was very good with ladies. He didn't date, but he had a lot of flings. When I had better days, I would tease him of having an STD.

"Just give me the permission, I am sure I can find you someone." He seemed convinced, almost smug, and I was almost certain that he had someone in mind already.

My mind went to Davina, and I wondered if he meant her.

"Do you mean Davina?" I decided to ask.

He frowned in an instant. "No."

That seemed to pique my curiosity.

"Why?"

He also glared at me. "You know Davina wants nothing to do with you. And she is traumatized enough as it is."

He was strangely so protective of Davina, that it was becoming too annoying. While Kane wanted her dead, Rowan wanted to save her.

I noticed that he secretly checks up on her, made sure that she had eaten, not sick and not doing anything to try to end her life. It irritated me. So much.

"And how does her trauma concern you?"

His face fell. "I know you are only trying to get justice for what Alpha Gideon did. But we both know that Davina is innocent in all of these. No matter who her father is."

I smiled. But there was no humor in it. "Alpha Gideon does not get the mercy of watching his daughter safe, of watching her free. He didn't grant me that same mercy."

"Don't be like him."

I shook my head slowly. "I grew up with him as my Alpha. I am worse."

"That is not true." Rowan said, his voice firm. "I know you."

He gave me a look as if he was trying to emphasize those words.

He didn't say much more. He just gave a small bow and walked out, leaving me alone to my thoughts.

I didn't like thoughts. Thoughts meant those memories. To stop those memories, I could think of a distraction. But distractions meant Davina, and Davina was dangerous.