4.

LYSSANDRA

“Lyssandra, how many times will I warn you?” Doctor Michelle sighed.

She was disappointed again. My vitals were reading high levels of stress, but it wasn't like I expected to go home and find my husband's cheating.

“I promise, I'll do better,” I promised again.

I'd made this promise three times this month already, and Michelle wasn't accepting it.

“We might have to keep you at the hospital if your stress signals are this high when you're back for your next test.”

There was a warning in her voice, and I knew she was serious.

I promised to stop stressing, and I left. The drive home was a blur, because again, I was thinking.

About Erden. I hadn't seen him in years, and though I'd said no to Riley’s idea, I knew he would be the perfect person to help me.

Arriving home, I knew something was wrong the moment I pulled into the driveway.

I knew it because Cade’s car was here.

Of course it was.

I killed the engine, and sat for a second.

My head was throbbing again, that dull, pulsing pain behind my eyes, and it got worse the moment I unlocked the front door.

Cade was on the couch, but worse beside him was Sadie.

Her legs were crossed, her blonde hair tucked delicately behind her ears.

She stood, her lips curving into a nervous little smile. Her flat stomach flowed to hips that were just wide enough to be sensual.

Sadie was my secretary. My friend, my right hand.

She knew everything. She typed out the emails I sent to investors while crying in the bathroom stall as I puked out my guts

She probably reminded Cade of my birthday.

She was sitting beside Cade on the couch, and they looked like a fucking family.

Her legs were crossed at the ankle like she owned the place, and Cade, he looked up and had the audacity to smile.

“Lyssandra,” he said calmly, like he didn't just take a dump in the middle of my existence.

Her red lipstick was smudged at the corner, like someone’s lips had been on it recently.

My stomach rolled.

“I gave you the keys,” I narrowed my eyes. “Which means I can take them back. Why are you here, Cade?”

“It’s my house,” he said, like that wasn't the most ridiculous thing I’d heard in my life. “Until the divorce is finalized, I have every right to be here.”

The nerve of this man.

“You lost every right when I found Arch on top of you, while you moaned like a p**n star. And since you fucked my secretary.”

Sadie blinked rapidly. I could see she wasn't expecting this.

She looked up at me like a kicked puppy, and moaned sadly. “Lys…that's so vile.”

Cade’s hand immediately touched the small of her back like he was defending her.

He was defending her, not his wife, but why would he defend me when he'd been so casually getting choked by Cade on my couch.

She looked between us, flustered. “I…I’m not sure this kind of environment is good for the child,” she said, placing a hand on her stomach. “I’m feeling nauseous. Stress isn’t good for the baby.”

The word hit me like a rock. The… what?

No, no, no, no.

A scream built in my chest, but it didn’t make it out.

There was a buzzing in my ears, and it was awful.

“The child?”

I walked forward instead, and slapped Cade across the face so hard my palm stung with the force of it.

He didn’t flinch. His jaw tightened, but he took it.

I turned to Sadie, and pointed back at the door. “Get. Out.”

Sadie stood, holding her stomach like I might physically attack her.

She blinked fast, and her eyes started to shine. “It’s not what you think, I swear, Lyss. Cade, didn’t you tell her?”

I screamed it this time. “Get out of my house!”

She stumbled toward the door, and ran out.

I walked around Cade who didn't say a word, straight into the bedroom, undressed, and stepped into the shower without another word.

Hot water fogged the window around me as I scrubbed every inch of my skin, harder than I needed to.

I stood under the water until my legs shook, until the pain in my chest became dull.

How many more betrayals did I need before I finally snapped? Not a lot more. I couldn't stand this anymore.

I stepped out, tying a towel around my body.

Cade was there in my room.

Water rolled down my neck as I stopped in place.

Cade didn’t look away. He just folded his arms and let his eyes drag over me.

My fingers tightened around the towel, and I wished I had a bigger one.

He smirked. “Don’t bother, Lyssandra. I wouldn’t sleep with you if you begged me.”

The words were harsh, almost like a slap against my face, but his voice was soft, sympathetic, even concerned for me.

“You’d die, Lyssandra,” he said. “A full orgasm might stop your heart. We both know it. We can't risk it.”

My throat closed. Because he wasn't wrong.

The medication made my chest tight, and the last time I kissed him really hard, I got breathless, and I needed an inhaler and a long nap.

I still hated him. I wanted to hate him, but he knew me too well. Cade was callous, but he was still the person who knew me the most, aparr from Riley.

“What did you want?” I whispered.

He walked over, and took my hand. I snatched it back.

He took it again, slower this time, and pressed a kiss to my knuckles.

My stomach flipped, my heart racing.

No.

His arms slid around my waist and my breath caught. When his lips brushed mine, I didn’t pull away fast enough.

My toes curled. Goodness, Cade could kiss.

He always could. He kissed like someone who knew the body he was touching, as though he’d memorized every inch of my body and would never forget.

But those lips had kissed Sadie, and Cade, and who knew who else.

I shoved him away hard. My breathing was harsh, almost ragged. “What do you want, Cade?”

He looked at me. Really looked, then sighed. “I want a family.”

I said nothing.

“Sadie is our surrogate,” he said. “The baby is ours. Yours and mine. We froze embryos last year, don’t you remember? I was going to tell you, but everything’s been so…”

He stopped, his eyes closed and when they opened, there were tears in them. I stared at him.

A part of me wanted to believe it. Another part wanted to throw up at the performance.

He was playing me like a violin, and I was falling for it.

“I’m sorry,” he said. “Please forgive me. I swear to you, I will never cheat on you again.”

The worst part was, I couldn’t tell which part of that was true. And which part was just another performance.