Shan POV
Samuel stayed when he could not convince me to go. He had already offered me additional benefits and a salary increase, but I rejected all his offers.
I remained true to my resolve. I won’t go back to New York.
Since day one, Shelly followed him around.
There was not a time when Shelly wouldn’t attach herself to Samuel.
My child seemed to instinctively know that blood connected them and was feeling the way she was feeling because of the bond.
Samuel, on the other hand, was all out in giving his full attention to Shelly.
Shelly was over the moon, and I can’t blame her.
Shan POVIt sounded so easy when Shelly put it that way.But sounding easy does not mean that it was easy.Marriage without love would be inviting disaster.I already had a f*cked up life. I need to be better this time.Besides, Samuel already made it clear. He wanted me, but he did not love me.And marriage was never on the table. He was not offering marriage. He wanted us to cohabit and make it appear like we were one happy family.I can’t live another lie. Even for my daughter.She was the reason I wanted to turn a new leaf. I wanted to become the best version of myself for her.Shelly deserves the best mom that I could be, and I can never do that if I live yet another lie.I had been living a lie for a long time.I lied about Shelly’s origins.For years, I lied to Pepper about having a s*xual relationship with her suitor.I can’t lie anymore.I wanted to live a less stressful life where I don’t have to be anyone for people to accept me.All I wanted was to be me - a good mother t
Shan POVSamuel and I looked at each other, stunned.I knew Shelly was attached to Samuel, but I never expected her to want him as her father. Maybe it was the blood connection talking.She loves Samuel and has grown attached in a few days.I shut my eyes, trying to at least find a modicum of composure, but it seemed elusive.My heart thudded fast in nervousness.I was at a loss for words.For a moment, I almost confessed.Should I reveal their relationship and risk forcing Samuel into a role he didn’t want?Of course, he would not deny Shelly.This early, I could see how much he loves her.There is a very high probability that he would indulge her.But I don’t want Samuel to think that I was forcing his hand.Shelly and I come as a package.I shook my head.Shelly’s unexpected question shook me. Now, I am grappling for answers.I turned to Samuel for ideas.He, too, looked stunned.We both did not expect it.Samuel was the first to recover. He joined us. Now, the three of us were cro
Shan POVMy chest tightened at his words.Again, silence settled around us like a warm cocoon.Something inside me shifted with the weight of his stare.I shook my head, trying to dispel this feeling.I don’t know what he was doing to me.I already told myself and him that I am better off without him, but why do I still feel this tingling sensation in my stomach when he does things for me?Why does he affect me so much?I shook my head.I shouldn’t waver.I can’t be dissuaded from my decision.Samuel Burke shouldn’t distract me from my only purpose - that is to become the best mother Shelly could hope for.I am done with love.Now, I am only focusing on my daughter.I have so many things to make it up to her.I swallowed and cleared my throat.“I'd better get our things ready,” I told Samuel, but my feet wouldn’t move.We stared into each other’s eyes and, against my better judgment, my feet carried me close to Samuel until only a few inches separated our bodies.I closed my eyes and
Shan POVI did not know what magic Samuel did, but in a span of two days, he showed how he was able to do what I considered impossible when he presented me with Shelly’s adoption papers.My eyes grew large when I realized what that was.It was so unexpected.It made me realize how powerful he was to be able to do this.“Is this real? Shelly’s mine?” Tears brimmed in my eyes when I asked.Samuel stepped forward, and before I could guess his intent, he was already wiping my tears away, brushing my cheek with the pad of his thumb.He then licked his thumb, making me blush deeply.“Don’t cry.” He told me.“I can’t. I was overwhelmed. I did not think you could pull this through this early. I thought…”“I told you, I will take care of Shelly’s papers. No one can take her away from you.”His voice held so much warmth that I jumped up on him to wrap my arms around his neck.I could not help it.My heart overflowed with joy and gratitude.“Thank you!” I gushed.He staggered backward by the une
Samuel POVWhile my mind was in turmoil, Shan had a different expression.It distracted me from my own mental struggle, so I eventually abandoned it to focus on her.I could see resignation on her face, but much to my consternation, it radiated a sense of peace.She looked like a person who had come out of a fight. She was bruised and battered, but she survived, which made her appreciate and give value to whatever was left of her.She looked like someone who had already accepted her fate and was now ready to move on with her life.She was turning a new page and closing in on the chapter that involves me.While the realization left me floundering, Shan must have already processed this in her head a thousand times, that there was no resistance left in her. Only acceptance.“It’s alright, Samuel.”Her reaction made me confused, but if the last few weeks taught me anything, it was that Shan is the most resilient person I know.She is this life’s best example of a survivor.Even before, sh
Shan POVDo you know how it feels to die with your brain still functioning?Some scientists claim that the brain is the last major organ to shut down when a person dies, and during that time, potential memory replay of significant events in one's life may occur.That was what was happening to me right now.My brain stopped functioning, but not before I felt pain pierce through my heart.“I see,” I told him and smiled a little, though my heart was breaking into pieces.I nodded at him.My chest felt stuffy, and I wanted to escape him so I could lick my wounds in silence.Samuel is rejecting me again.It was not an outright rejection, but it felt just the same.The pain was duller, but it didn't change the fact that he didn't love me.Want and love are two different things. He wants me, but he does not love me.Maybe I needed to hear the truth from him to kill any hope in my head.His last statement shattered everything.Samuel and I… I shook my head and smiled a little.“No. You don’t.