Chapter 16

~ LENA ~

“Touch me.”

The words sounded soft, but they sent a wave of heat rushing through my body.

It sounded simple. Natural. Like something a wife should do without thinking. But nothing about this felt simple to me.

My heart pounded violently in my chest. My palms on his shirt grew damp. Every instinct inside me screamed that I was standing on the edge of something irreversible.

Because this wasn’t just a kiss anymore. This was the moment everything would truly change. And I was terrified—not just because it was my first time. But because the man standing in front of me believed I was someone else.

Nathan’s eyes remained on mine. They were dark and steady, watching me with a patience that only made my nerves worse.

There was no pressure in his expression. Just a quiet certainty that told me he trusted me. And that trust twisted something painful inside my chest.

If he knew the truth, if he knew the woman standing in front of him now wasn’t Kim, would he still look at me like that?

I swallowed nervously as I already knew the answer.

Slowly, almost cautiously, I loosened my grip on his shirt. I’d never touched a man this way before. If I hesitated now, it might seem strange.

I was his wife. I was supposed to want this. I had to show him, not just with words but with actions also.

This was what I had signed up for. What I was here for. I had to do this. For Sofia. For the promise I made.

Without letting myself think too much, my hands slid slowly over his broad chest. I could feel the strength beneath the fabric of his white shirt, the steady rise and fall of his breathing.

Boldly, I held his gaze as my fingers worked at the buttons. One by one, I freed them, pressing my mouth to every inch of skin that was exposed.

He drew in a sharp breath. The sound did something strange inside me. It made me feel…powerful.

The realization that I could affect him too—that he wasn’t the only one in control—sent a dangerous, intoxicating thrill through me.

My hands grew bolder. Before I could question it, my palm moved down, over the hard lines of his stomach, lower until it brushed against the waistband of his pants.

Nathan’s hand caught my wrist before I could go any farther. He looked down at me, amusement flickering in his eyes.

“Well,” he murmured, a slow smile forming, “now this is the Kim I remember.”

Brave. Confident. Bold. Everything I was pretending to be.

His thumb brushed lightly over my wrist before he released it.

“My woman,” he added softly, pride laced in his tone.

The guilt pricked at me again, but it didn’t last long. Because in the next second, he took over.

His hands slid to my waist and, without warning, he swept me off my feet in one swift move that startled me.

I clung to him as he carried me towards the bed. His steps were slow, deliberate, as if he had all the time in the world. As though this moment mattered more than anything else.

My heart hammered wildly against my ribs as he lowered me onto the soft sheets with surprising gentleness, the mattress dipping beneath my weight.

For a second, the cool fabric brushed against my bare skin, sending another shiver through me.

Then he followed.

Nathan braced one arm beside my head, hovering over me, his body caging mine against the bed without quite touching it.

For a moment, he didn’t move. His eyes traveled over me slowly, unhurriedly. From the loose waves of my hair spread out across the pillow… to my flushed cheeks… to my parted lips still unsteady from his kisses.

The intensity of his gaze made my breath falter. It was almost reverent, like he was memorizing me.

A shiver ran through me suddenly, subtle but impossible to stop. My body trembled beneath him, and I wasn’t even sure why exactly.

It wasn’t fear. Nathan had never made me feel threatened in that sort of way.

The truth sat heavy inside my chest, tightening around my lungs like a quiet trap.

I was in his bed. In his arms. Under his gaze. And I wasn’t the woman he believed I was.

The thought alone made nervous energy ripple through me again. And this time, Nathan noticed.

His brow furrowed slightly as his hand moved to my arm, holding me warmly.

“You’re trembling,” he murmured, brushing his thumb gently against my skin as though trying to soothe the invisible storm inside me. He searched my face. “Nervous?”

I hesitated. The truth was right there on my tongue. Of course, I was nervous. I’d taken up another woman’s life. I was lying to a man who had been nothing but nice to me since the day we met. I felt terrible. Scared.

But the words that came out of my mouth now weren’t the truth.

“I’m fine,” I whispered.

Nathan smiled, his expression softening completely. “You don’t have to pretend with me.”

The irony of those words struck deep inside me. If only he knew.

His thumb brushed lightly over my cheekbone, slow and reassuring. “Listen, angel. We don’t have to do this if you’re not ready. We could—”

“No.”

The answer came out faster than I expected. Nathan paused slightly, looking surprised. I was surprised myself.

The truth was, deep down in me—despite the fear, despite the guilt twisting inside my heart—there was another feeling rising inside. And it was one I couldn’t ignore.

A part of me wanted this, wanted him. It felt reckless, insane… but it was there.

And before I could overthink it, before doubt could pull me back, I reached for him.

My fingers curled into the front of his shirt as I pulled him down and kissed him. There was nothing soft or hesitant about it. This time, the kiss was desperate in a way I didn’t fully understand. My lips pressed against his like I was trying to prove something—not just to him, but to myself.

Nathan responded, his mouth moving against mine passionately, his restraint finally giving way to something more intense.

The reaction sent heat rushing through my body. I pulled back slightly, breathing hard. “I’m ready.”

I met his gaze boldly, forcing myself not to look away.

“I want you,” I said softly, one hand caressing the side of his face. “I want this.”

For a moment, Nathan didn’t move. He just stared at me, searching my eyes for the truth. “You’re sure?”

I nodded.

He didn’t answer with words. He kissed me, harder this time, the sudden intensity stealing the breath from my lungs.

Nathan’s hand slid to the back of my neck, holding me there as his mouth moved against mine with a hunger that made my pulse race wildly. The careful control he had been holding onto all evening finally slipped, and I felt it in the way his body lowered slightly over mine. My fingers tightened instinctively on his shirt, pulling him closer.

For a while, the world seemed to narrow to nothing but his warmth, his breath, and the slow, deep rhythm of his kiss. His lips were firm but patient, coaxing rather than demanding. And every time I tried to pull back for air, he followed as if he couldn’t quite let me go yet.

Eventually, he drew back slowly, leaving only a breath of space between us. His eyes searched my face again. They had the kind of sincerity in them that made my heart break as he said, “I love you, Kim.”

Kim. The name pierced straight through me again, dragging the guilt back with it. I should have remembered. I shouldn’t have allowed myself to forget, even for a second, that this was a lie.

This moment—his love, his tenderness—none of it was meant for me.

But lying there beneath him, feeling the warmth of his body and the gentleness in his touch, something inside me had already shifted.

I wasn’t supposed to feel this way. I wasn’t supposed to want him.

Yet, despite the lie between us, despite everything I knew could go wrong, I couldn’t bring myself to stop.

My hand lifted to his face almost without thinking, my fingers brushing lightly along the faint roughness of his stubble.

“I love you too,” I whispered.

The lie tasted bitter on my tongue. The instant the words left my lips, guilt surged through me again.

God help me.

Tomorrow, the lies would still be there waiting. Tomorrow, the truth might tear everything apart. But tonight…

Tonight, I allowed myself one selfish moment. Just this once, I told myself. Just for tonight.

As Nathan lowered his mouth to mine again, I closed my eyes and let myself fall into the lie I had already begun to believe.