7

Alice Anderson

I brought out my phone from my bag and dial my friend's number, James. 

James is a friend with benefits. Yes, you heard that right. We both do what couples do except for the love part, there's nothing as love between us. 

James has always been there for me ever since we were kids. I met him a year after Dad took me in. He's caring, loving, and a sweet guy but, never for once have I ever felt anything for him and so he did not also.  

You can call me a bad girl but, I'm not a wayward type either. James was my first and he has always been the man I had sex with aside from Robert whom I happen to meet three months ago.

"Hey" I said in a faint voice the moment he picked up the call. 

"Are you okay?" That was the first thing that came out of his mouth to me. 

As expected. James is just the best guy in the whole world. He's the only man who understands me so much even before I speak aside Dad. 

"Can.. can we see?" 

"Want me to pick you up?"

"No, I will take a cab down there" I said. 

"A cab? Why not your car?" He asked.

"No, I prefer to take a cab. I'm not in the mood to drive" 

"Okay then, be fast." He said and I hang up the call. 

•

I arrived at his place and a broad smile appeared on his face upon seeing me. "Hey" he kissed my cheek. 

I hug him tightly not letting go at that moment. I have no idea what has gotten into me. I'm suddenly down all of a sudden and I don't want to admit this is all because of Ken. 

 I broke the hug as I suddenly took him off guard and kissed him passionately. I expected him to kiss me back at the same pace but rather, he stopped me. 

"Hey, hey, hey, you need to calm down. What's wrong?" He questioned, chuckling. 

"What do you mean, what's wrong? Of course, I want you" I said, trying to kiss him again but he stopped me again. 

"Alice, you need to stop this, okay? Why are you like this all of a sudden? This is not you" he looked at me suspiciously and confused.

"I don't get you, James. When did you begin to avoid my touch?" I questioned in a pissed tone. 

I know, I look so stupid right now but I don't care! He led me into this in the first place. He was the first man who made me a woman. 

"Hey, I'm not trying to avoid you okay" he said softly, placing both his hands on my cheeks and giving me a light kiss on my lip. "Believe me, I will never avoid you. That's the last thing I will ever do" 

"Then, what's all this? I tried touching you but you avoided me" I stated the obvious and he sighed. 

"Alice, can we talk?" He asked instead. I looked at his face suspiciously with a raised brow. 

"You're making me anxious, James. What's going on?" I asked.

He made me seat in front of him on his sofa and begin to scratch the nape of his neck. "Alice, whatever I'm about to say right now, do not get me wrong, okay? I do not want you to get upset....." He trailed off whilst studying my face carefully. 

Wait a minute, I hope it's not what I'm thinking. I really hope it's not what I'm thinking. 

"Don't tell me... Don't tell me, you now have a girlfriend?!" I point an accusing finger at him. I expect him to deny it and tell me I was wrong but, the look on his face says otherwise. 

"Alice, I..." 

"No, that's enough. I get it now. I think I need to leave" I said, getting up from my seat. 

I can't believe he used me. 

But, what was I thinking? He would never find true love? I can't expect a man like James not to have intentions of settling down with a good woman. I mean, he's a good-looking young man. He's sexy and rich too.

He might be good-looking but not as Ken- my head suddenly says. 

Shut up!- I mentally snap at my thought.

I looked at him and sighed. Any woman would be lucky to have him as her man. I have no idea why I feel so upset about this news he just buzzes to me. Plus, it's not like I'm in love with him, right? So, why am I upset?

"Can you at least listen to me for once and allow me to talk?" He looked pissed. 

Wait, he has the right to be upset at me? I should be the one getting mad at him and not the other way round. 

He deceived me and made me believe he has no girl in his life because, how in the world did they come this far yet, I had no idea. 

"What do you have to say? That, you now have a girl and whatever has been going on between us has to stop? Fine! I'm happy for you! I'm going to leave so you can concentrate more on your GIRL!" I burst angrily stretching on the word 'Girl'. 

I have no idea why I'm like this toward him all of a sudden. I do not have feelings for him, do I?

"Alice! Damn it! What are you saying? You're getting it all wrong" he hissed before facepalming himself.

"What do you mean?" I stared at him, confused. 

"Like I said earlier, I have something important to discuss with you and, this is about US. You and I" he said looking intensely into my eyes. 

I blink my eyes numerous times. "What are you talking about?"

He made me seat again and this time around, very close to him on the couch. "I know, this might be a little bit shock to you but, I don't think I can hold it in any longer. I've been trying to suppress this feeling but, I just can't find myself locking up when it's affecting me badly" 

"James, you need to stop talking in parables and tell me exactly what's going on. You now have a girlfriend? Of course, I'm fine with that. I'm not going to hate you because of that if, that's what you're thinking"

"Damn it! I told you this is not about any girl! I have no girl, Alice. I have... No one in my life... except you. You're the only important woman in my life and that's never going to change" he said, sincerity laced in his eyes.  

 I've known him for years, and I've been able to read him like an open book. I know, exactly what the look on his face says right now.

"I swear, you better tell me what is going on because you're still making me confuse. Tell me what it's before I do something crazy" I threatened.

"Alice, do not get upset okay?"

"Okay"

"Promise?"

"I promise you, James. I won't get upset no matter what you say. Now, tell me, what's it?"

He hold my hands in his and caressed them gently. "I... I... lov... I love you, Alice. let's get married tomorrow as soon as possible"