9 - Annabelle.

Josh was gone when I woke up.

As I expected.

I know he's normally at the office at exactly seven in the morning. In fact, I rarely see him most mornings whenever I woke up. If he wasn't working, he was usually out locked up in his room watching crime documentaries on his phone while I get ready for school.

It is one of the things I like about this parenting arrangement we have. It is pretty chill.

Despite being the CEO of his footwear company, Josh always ensures he's present at work even if he's got assistants to help keep things at bay. He believes in leading by example. For the first year after Mom moved away to Miami, I slept at Samantha's house on the nights he wouldn't be home, but after I turned 17, he let me stay home alone. I've never thrown a party or gotten into any kind of trouble. The only thing is that I usually film my Onlyfans videos when he's not there.

It has been... a weird night. It is probably for the best that Josh won't be home today so I can try to gather my thoughts well.

God, I cring just imagining the conversation we are going to have. The conversation we will have to have.

What I'd said and done, we can't just ignore.

What the fuck is wrong with me?

I'm not sure why I'd done any of it. Why I'd felt his cock, why I'd spoken to him in a teasing voice, why I'd asked my own father if he wanted to fuck me. It was all crazy.

The thing is, it had just... happened. I didn't have any agenda, I wasn't playing any games. When I sat back on his... his crotch, I guess - I didn't know what to call it - I had been so surprised that it was hard. So surprised - I never would have expected it - but not... disappointed.

I'd felt curious, and excited.

When I'd put his hand on my tit, I wanted to see how far he would go, and I felt myself getting wet at the feeling of his boner against me.

That moment, when he'd closed his eyes and pushed up against me, squeezing my breast - it had made me wet.

But of course he pushed me away. What did I think was going to happen? That my own father was going to take my virginity?

It was gross and weird. But even thinking about it today is turning me on.

Josh is a good-looking man. Samantha was right - he is hot. With his ripped abs and massive arms, he can actually be a fitness model or something.

When those arms held me, and wrapped around me, they felt so big and strong I felt like nothing bad could ever happen to me.

Trying to imagine that big, burly man having eyes only for me, eyes that smouldered with his own desire for me - imagining what he would look like if he had his hands on my body - it made me feel heated in a way I'd never felt before. Like I would die if I didn't get it.

I want my dad.

I walk home from school with Samantha. "Let's go to the beach party tonight," she's saying. "I'll stay at your house and we can stay as late as we want."

"Not tonight," I shake my head. "I'm going to do a few hours of cam work tonight. Besides, those beach parties are all the same. I don't need to drink in the sand with a bunch of kids more than once a week."

"Savage," she laughs. "How much money do you think you'll make tonight? I kind of gave up doing the webcam thing, mainly because Kiara is always fucking home."

"It'll be better when we get our own place. You can do them all the time. I usually make about $1,000. It'd be more if I did, like, full everything, but I don't want to do that while I'm still a virgin."

"So why don't you lose your virginity and start making more dough?"

I twist my mouth. "I don't know. It's not that simple. I want to be, like, really into it, you know?"

"No, girl," she shakes her head. "I don't know. Why don't you just get it over with? Fuck one of your cam guys. Fuck him on camera. It's just sex. Once you do it, it doesn't feel like such a big deal."

Samantha has slept with three guys, and prided herself on being a self-described "slut." I think it made her feel worldly, to know about sex.

The thing is, I do know about sex. I sell sex for a living - the promise of it, anyway. And I've learned a lot about what men want and like. I know how to play the game. But growing up a bit of a "daddy's girl," I guess I've absorbed the idea that I am special, that being with me is special.

That seems kind of ironic now.

When we get to Samantha's house, I go in for a while to hang out before going home.

"Hi sweeties!" calls Kiara happily when we walk in. A full-time caretaker, with no boyfriend, she is always glad for something to do. "Let me fix you some snacks."

We sit at the kitchen island while Kiara opens some Cokes for us and makes guacamole.

She is really pretty, Kiara. Her bleached blonde hair is stacked high on her head in a messy knot, and she is dressed kind of scantily in a tight tank top and lycra shorts. She has great legs.

"I was just working out downstairs," she says, as if I am going to judge her outfit. "That Peloton thing is amazing. Sweetheart, do you and Josh ever do anything like that?"

Huh? "Like, exercise bike stuff?"

"Yeah, you know, just exercise stuff, I guess. Do you have a home gym?"

I shrug. "Josh lifts weights in the garage."

She lookz overly interested. "Oh! Does he now?"

"Chill, sis," says Samantha with a smirk. "Remember I told you they're going to be dating?" she says to me, "Kiara is, like, amped for her date with your dad."

Kiara blushes. "Oh, Samantha, no! Don't be silly. It's not like that."

I feel something icy cold form in my stomach. "Are you... going to go out?" I ask. My voice come out weirdly stern, and I must seem intense but I can't smile.

She blushes an even deeper red. "Oh, well, yes, I mean, we're going to get to know each other better, that's all." She is smiling. She is thrilled. "We're actually going to get dinner tomorrow. He just texted me!" She holds up her phone and shakes it, like her story needs a prop. As if what she has to say is so interesting and unbelievable that we will question her on it, like, No way, with what phone? That phone?

And all I can think is, he just texted her?

After what had happened last night, I kind of assumed he was over at the office feeling anxious and confused like I was. I had even sort of imagined that he was having the same kinds of feelings that I was - attraction and desire, even if it was wrong...

But he wasn't even thinking about me at all. All he was thinking about was locking down a date with the neighborhood MILF.

I push back my chair and stand up. "I actually don't feel that well," I say hastily. Awkwardly.

Kiara's face contorts with concern. "Oh honey! What's wrong?"

"Sorry," I pick my bag off the floor. "It's... avocados. I think I'm allergic."

"What?" says Samantha in disbelief.

"I have to go - so sorry. Samantha, I'll text you later. Sorry." And I hurriedly make my exit, rushing down the street to the sanctity of home.