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this is because of you
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Bloom i don't want you to hate me
15I somehow found myself going to another party—not to attend but to pick up my drunk best friend. Jade had a family dinner so she couldn't pick Bea up—which left me to make sure she would get home safe. I didn't mind. I scrambled through the crowd of sweaty, liquor-reeking bodies to try to catch sight of Bea. It was a difficult task with the house being this crowded and Bea being rather short. "Woah—Jasmine?"I looked up when my shoulder bumped against someone else's. "Hey, Shane." I smiled lightly, still glancing around to hunt for Bea within the crowd. I'd like to get out of here sooner than later. "What are you doing here? I didn't know you were coming." Shane grinned giddily. I could tell he had quite a bit to drink. I could smell it on his breath—see it on his face as he swayed his head side to side. I sighed, meeting his eyes again. "I'm looking for Bea—have you seen her?" Shane laughed—due to the alcohol in his system that made something I said seem funnier than it was.
Bloom she decided
16I stared between my friends, at a loss. I looked at them intently, hoping they would help me—just tell me what to do. "What—what do I do?" Bea scoffed, her head tilting back as she laughed. "You're asking me? Dude—you know I'm going to tell you to break up with him. It's not like you need him."I pouted like a child, whining. I was just—so utterly confused. "Is it really justified to break up with him because he went after Zac? I mean—we've never had any fights or disagreements—or anything before this."Jade narrowed her eyes thoughtfully. "Well—are you doing it because you're seeing Evan's true colours and don't like what you're seeing? Or is it because of Zac?""Zac?"Jade nodded firmly. "Yes. Because you don't like that Zac got hurt because of you. Because you worry about Zac instead of Evan. Because what Zac wants is more important to you than what Evan wants."I blinked.Well—I don't know.Of course I cared about Zac.But Evan... I still held feelings for him, I just didn't
Bloom see me like this
17"Zac is drunk out of his mind. Can you come?"My eyebrows pulled together. Why was John calling me to tell me this? I thought Zac was done with that stuff.I just—I shouldn't have expected that he would really stop for me. Just saying that makes me want to laugh. Of course he wouldn't. But even if he is drunk—why did John need me there? I sat down on the end of my bed. "Why do you need me to come, John? I'm sure you've dealt with this enough times to do it again now. I mean—how could I possibly help? Just—just take him home."I heard some fumbling before John sighed. "I don't know. We're not a party, we're at his house—and he won't calm down. Maybe you can calm him down since he isn't listening to me or Shane." I laughed dryly. How could I possibly calm him down if his own best friend couldn't? "John—I want to help but Zac doesn't need me."John hesitated for a moment. "I think he does, Jas.""What—what are you talking about?"John heaved out a heavy breath, evidently growing fr
Bloom it felt right
18When I woke up the next morning, there was a weight over me. I blinked my eyes open, squinting. Zac was peacefully asleep, his head on my chest and arm slung over my waist. He looked like an adorable little child—his face relaxed, no tension hiding behind his features. From this up close, I could see the faint freckles that spotted over his nose. Memories from the previous night flooded my mind.Guilt coursed through my body. I hadn't meant to fall asleep. I was going to wait for Zac to doze off and then spend the night in the recliner if I had to. Evan. This was—wrong. I felt sick at myself. Zac and I were friends and I did adore and care for him but this wasn't honourable—I had a boyfriend. I analyzed every line and dot on Zac's face. He looked so tranquil and calm—I didn't want to wake him up. His eyelashes were long enough to brush against the top of his cheek. His jawline was carved perfectly like a sculpture. There was a slight stubble forming on across his jaw. His lips
Bloom it's your day
19Things had been oddly good lately. Evan and I are good—although I still want to know what the deal with him and Zac is. I don't bring it up anymore because I know he won't tell me. It's easier to let it go rather than cause another fight. Although, I can't help but still be curious about it. Every time I'm with Evan, I feel more on edge and I notice myself paying closer attention to the things he says, or the way he reacts. I try to find hints—but there is never anything. Zac and I remain close. I think we're close. We study after school and he's getting better at chemistry. Our study session usually end with us watching an episode or two of Breaking Bad. Zac comments on everything, and spends much of his time throwing food at me. "Happy birthday, Hun." I was sitting at the kitchen island, scrolling on my phone. My dad walked into the kitchen, a cupcake in hand. He had a candle lit on top of the cupcake. I laughed as he approached me. "You didn't have to do this, dad." I smil
Bloom i wish for things to always be like this
20I was sitting outside on the bleachers by myself at lunch—when Zac came over to me. He didn't say anything. He walked up the bleachers and sat down beside me, silently. After a moment, he spoke quietly. "It's cold outside, you shouldn't sit here. You're going to get sick." He took off his coat and placed it over my shoulders.I looked at him flatly. "I don't care if I get sick, Zac.""I do." He just looked at me. Both his gaze and voice were gentle. I ran a hand down my face sighed. "I'm—I'm sorry I lost it this morning."Zac shook his head frantically, his eyebrows pulling together. "You have nothing to be sorry about, Bloom. I'm the one who—well, I apologize for Shane being a dumbass.""He didn't know." I shrugged. "Not his fault. It's not anyones—I just don't like my birthday."Zac turned to look out at the empty field. "I hate Christmas." I looked at him. "It just reminds me of how fucked up my family is—reminds me how much my family isn't even really a family." He chuckled d
Bloom day dreaming
21I thought everything was okay—but now I was so sure.The only thing I could think about was Zac.Sitting through all my classes—I couldn't focus or pay attention. I was lost in my head, thinking about him. Jade and Bea would be speaking to me but I wouldn't catch a single word they said—I was too busy thinking about him. Everything about him—the way one loose curl of his hair would always fall on his forehead, his chocolate brown eyes that looked more like honey when light hit them, the intoxicating sound of his laugh, the way he would become cold, his jaw would clench when he was mad or annoyed, the way he called me Bloom as if it were my real name, how he would call me 'love' without even noticing it, whenever we texted and he would annoyingly only respond with pictures of gifs of jasmine flowers or animated princess Jasmine—completely ignoring what it was we were really talking about. Even worse than all of that—I kept thinking back to the night of my birthday.Was he going to
Bloom looks like you're the one being charmed
22The next day at lunch, John, Shane, and Zac joined us which was fantastic because I didn't know how to look at Zac without my heart starting to race a mile a minute. The whole time, I did my best to avoid eye contact but it was difficult considering Zac wouldn't stop looking at me.He was staring at me with a cocky grin on his lips and an eyebrow quirked, leaning back in his seat comfortably. He was amused. He could tell I was avoiding eye contact."Hey, you guys should come over Friday." Jade spoke to the boys, smiling brightly."What's on Friday?" Shane asked as he stuffed his mouth with fries."Our old friend is coming to town for a few days. We're just going to be hanging, you guys should join. It'll be fun." Jade smiled softly at the boys, her eyes inviting."Way to break up the Fab Four, Jade." Bea rolled her eyes as she scrolled through her phone. Jade and I both knew she wasn't really mad about it though."You sure?" John asked. "Wouldn't it be intruding on a reunion or som
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