002

Harper's POV

I tried to force my eyelids open and a displeased groan escaped from my lips.

My head throbbed so hard that it felt like my skull might split open. My mouth was dry and my stomach turned as I rolled onto the too unfamiliar soft bed.

I blinked up at a ceiling that I didn't recognize, my breath catching in my throat as I suddenly started to panic.

This wasn't my dorm room.

I pushed myself up too quickly and instantly regretted it when the room spun. My dress from last night was wrinkled, twisted around my thighs, one strap sliding off my shoulder. My heels were on the floor beside the bed and my purse sat tipped over near the dresser, the contents half spilling out like someone had hurriedly dropped it.

And a cold wave of dreadful feeling crawled through my mind.

No, no, no,no.

I squeezed my eyes shut, forcing myself to remember what had happened last night.

The party, Ethan, the balcony, THE KISS!

My chest tightened so painfully I almost couldn't breathe because I could now remember her.

Madison.

Ethan's arm around her waist as she spoke. “He's my boyfriend and we've been together for six months.”

The memories hit so hard that it made me feel sick all over again and after that…everything blurred.

All I could remember was crying in the bathroom and someone handing me a drink and telling me it would help.

I turned my head instinctively and I froze.

A man was sleeping beside me. Shirtless!

He had broad shoulders, tanned skin, dark hair falling messily across his forehead with one arm flung over the pillow.

For one horrifying second, I forgot how to breathe as I recognized the person sleeping beside me.

Ashton Reid.

Ethan's older brother and Westbrook's hockey captain.

Campus royalty in his own right, only colder, rougher, and somehow even more intimidating than Ethan. Where Ethan smiled and made people fall into step. Ashton barely looked at anyone and still had the entire campus watching him. Girls even talk about him with dangerous fantasy.

And he was in bed beside me.

My stomach hurts so hard I thought I might throw up.

“Oh my God,” I whispered in disbelief. “What have I done?”

Ashton shifted in his sleep, his brow furrowing slightly, and I jolted into motion.

I scrambled out of bed so fast my knees nearly face out. I grabbed my heels, my purse, my phone— just anything I could find— while my hands shook so badly I could barely hold onto them. My pulse was screaming in my ears, drowning out everything else.

What had I done?

Had we..?

I couldn't even finish the thought. I didn't want to know anything.

I risked one last glance at Ashton. He was still asleep, breathing slow and even, completely unaware of how scared I was to be here.

Then I bolted. I stumbled down the stairs, gripping my shoes to my chest, and nearly tripping over the last step in my rush to get out. I didn’t stop until I was outside in the cold morning air, sucking in shaky breaths like I’d barely escaped a fire.

My phone read 8:17 a.m.

I was going to be late for class.

Under normal circumstances, that would’ve mattered, but right now, I felt like I was losing my mind.

As I walked back into my campus dorm, I kept trying to force my memories into place, to remember everything else that had happened except for Madison and Ethan, but nothing came.

By the time I made it to campus all changed into a hoody that would at least cover my face, I still looked exactly how I felt— wrecked.

Two girls near the fountain looked at me, leaned toward each other, and immediately started talking behind their hands. A group of guys outside the student center glanced at me, one of them actually laughing and it made my skin prickled with so much unease.

Something was wrong.

Everybody was holding their phones and looking at me as though I was some joke.

My phone buzzed in my hand and I saw three missed calls from my roommate, Flora, with seven texts.

The last one read: ‘Harper, please tell me that isn't you. Check the blog NOW.”

My stomach twisted.

Westbrook had a student-run gossip blog—anonymous posts, campus rumors, leaked photos, all the ugly things bored rich kids did for entertainment. Most of the time I ignored it.

With trembling fingers, I opened the page and the headline hit me like a slap. “BEST FRIEND’S GIRL? HARPER QUINN CAUGHT MAKING OUT WITH ASHTON REID AFTER ETHAN COLE’S PARTY”

Right at that instant, my vision blurred. Below it was a video of me and Ashton, at the bar!

His hand on my waist, my hands on his shoulders…and then…God.

I was freaking kissing him.

No, no, no, no.

I stared at the screen, horror coursing through my soul. I didn't remember that. I didn't remember any of this. But there I was, clear as day, leaning into Ashton like I wanted him, like I didn't want to let him go.

My chest rose and fell as I gulped in hard.

“Harper”I looked up so fast that my neck hurt.

Ethan stood a few feet away in the hallway outside the humanities building with burning eyes and a tight jaw.

He looked so furious.

People were already slowing down around us, pretending not to stare while obviously staring.

“Ethan, I can explain…”

“Can you?” he cut in with a sharp tone. “Because I watched that video three times, Harper, and it looked pretty clear to me.”

My face burned with embarrassment. “I was drunk. I don’t even remember going to the bar.”

He laughed once, so coldly that I felt it in my bones. “Right. So first you kiss me, then you throw yourself at my brother, huh?”

The words hit me right to my face like a punch as I tried to recoil from what he had just said.

“What? E…”My voice flattered. “That's not what happened. You kissed me first, have you forgotten?“

Why was he saying it like I kissed him when he was the one who initiated the kiss.

“Really?” He snapped. “Because it sure as hell looked like you kissed Ashton first.”

I flinched, a disbelief gasp escaping from my lips as I tried to understand that he actually did not believe me.

“I didn’t mean to…”

“You didn’t mean to?” His eyes raked over me, furious and disbelieving. “Do you have any idea how this makes me look?”

I stared at him.

That was what he cared about? Not even whether I was okay or whether I remembered any of it.

Not the fact that I had woken up terrified in his brother’s bed with no idea how I got there because he left me reeling in shame and disbelief after introducing me to his six months girlfriend when he had just finished kissing me.

He just cared for his image.

“Ethan…” My voice shook. “I was upset. About last night. About Madison. I drank too much and I don’t remember…”

“That’s supposed to make it better?” he asked bitterly. “You were upset with me, so you hook up with Ashton?”

“I don’t know what happened!” I said, louder than I meant to, tears stinging my eyes. “I swear, I don’t remember.”

People were definitely watching now and I hated it. I hated all of it, but what I hated most was the look on Ethan’s face…like I had done something unforgivable.Like I was the one who should be ashamed.

“I’m sorry,” I whispered, because somehow, despite everything, guilt was swallowing me whole. “I’m so sorry, Ethan. I didn’t want this. I didn’t mean for any of it to happen.”

But his expression didn't soften, not even a little. “You always do this,” he muttered.

I blinked. “What?”

“You get attached, you make things complicated and then when it blows up, you act like you had no control over it.”

I felt myself shrinking under his cold and cruel words.

“I would never do anything to hurt you,” I said desperately. “You know that.”

“Then maybe you should’ve thought about that before you kissed my brother.”

I reached for his arm, panic rising sharp and fast inside of me. “Please, Ethan..”

But he stepped back before I could touch him. “I need space.”