Chapter 4

Chapter 4: Now or Never

Forbidden fruit really does taste the sweetest.

Tyler dragged me away from the club, his grip firm and impatient on my arm, marching me out into the cool night air without a word. We didn’t speak during the ride back to their apartment. The silence hummed with his disapproval, sharp and unyielding. The moment the door clicked shut behind us, I wrenched free and rounded on him.

“You know exactly how I feel about him!” I shouted, voice cracking with frustration. “Why do you keep meddling in my life—when I never breathe a word about yours?”

He faced me, jaw set hard. “Your father asked me to look out for you. Have you forgotten you’re already promised to someone? Your future is decided. You ought to be focusing on becoming the kind of wife this alliance requires.”

I gritted my teeth, heat rising in my chest. “Why should I pour myself into being perfect for a stranger? I don’t even know his name! I know we’ll never get along!”

“Maybe you will, maybe you won’t, Avar Sloan.” He stepped closer, voice sharp. “But you know your life is already set in stone. So stick to it!” He snapped the last words and grumpily walks in.

I stormed after him, furious—but stopped short, bumping hard against his broad back. “Move! Get out of my way!” I shoved him, palms flat against his chest.

Tyler spread his arms wide, blocking the hallway, solid as a wall. I was small beside him, helpless to push past. I peeked over his shoulder—and froze. Rose stood in the living room, holding a steaming mug of coffee, watching us with eyes that missed nothing.

The look she fixed on Tyler said everything they refused to speak aloud—anger, accusation, exhaustion. I pinched Tyler hard on the soft flesh at his side. He groaned, flinching, and glared down at me.

“I said move!” I shoved again, harder this time, squeezing past him even though my shoulders brushed his. I ran straight to Rose and wrapped my arms around her, spilling a splash of hot coffee onto her sleeve in my haste. “Oops! I’m so sorry!” I giggled, breathless and relieved.

Rose didn’t seem to mind. She set the mug down gently.

“Ava, you really shouldn’t get close to her,” Tyler warned from behind us, rubbing his side. “She’ll break your bones.”

I shot him a sharp look over my shoulder. “That only applies to you. I’m sure you did something to piss her off—and I can guess what.”

And I was right. He’d turned her quiet, orderly apartment into a mess—empty bottles, strange women’s things, even dirt and waste tracked into her own room. No wonder she was furious. She’d found filth where she kept her most precious belongings.

“Yeah, whatever!” Tyler muttered, storming off to his room and slamming the door.

Rose and I looked at each other—and burst out laughing. Tyler looked ridiculous when he was cornered and guilty.

Once we were alone, Rose gestured me to sit. “Glad they let you out of the house.”

I waved away the thin curl of smoke from her cigarette. “I earned my freedom—sort of. I learned a new skill, so they gave me a few days. But the moment Mom calls, I have to fly back.”

Rose raised an eyebrow. “And what great skill earned you this reprieve?”

I straightened, proud even though it sounded silly. “I can cook spaghetti now! Properly!”

She gave me a look—amused, gentle, not mocking. “That’s lovely, Ava.”

“I know it’s nothing to you,” I hurried to explain, “you grew up doing all of this. But for me? This is huge. I never thought I could do something useful with my hands.”

Rose chuckled softly. “That’s not what I meant. I meant—just spaghetti? Have you tried making something that’s truly yours? Something you chose?”

I shrugged, staring at my hands. “I wouldn’t even know where to begin.”

She leaned forward, voice soft but firm. “You really don’t believe things can change, do you? That you can build a life different from the one they planned?”

I bit my lip. I had no answer. Even if I wanted something else… every road eventually led back to where I was born to be. I’d accepted it. Reluctantly, but I had.

“Why not give yourself a chance?” Rose pressed on. “Maybe your life isn’t meant to follow their blueprint. Have you ever even tried to say no? You have a choice—”

“Choices are for people like you, Rose,” I cut her off, quiet and bitter. “Mine were taken from me before I could speak. Every path was laid down long ago. All I can do now is walk it.”

She looked at me with such sadness it hurt. “Have you ever tried saying no to them? And what about the things you actually want? Like Leon… don’t you love him?”

Love. The word felt strange, heavy, unfamiliar on my tongue.

“Yes—love,” she repeated gently, like she knew I’d never truly heard it said about me. “You wouldn’t chase him across cities, across oceans, if you didn’t. That’s far too much effort for someone who’s nothing but red flags.”

I fell silent. I chased him because I wanted him. Because watching him made me feel alive in a way nothing else ever had. But was that… love? Or was it just longing? Just hunger? Just… a habit I couldn’t break?

I searched within myself and found only certainty: when I see him, my heart races. When he looks at me, my breath catches. When he speaks, I want to listen. Even when he looks at me like I’m something to be hunted… it still feels like something real.

Was that love?

I didn’t think so. Love wouldn’t make me want to hide every time he stepped close. Love wouldn’t leave me trembling and unsure.

“Rose…” I said softly, “I don’t even know what love is. Maybe I want him simply because he’s Leon… and because I can’t have him. Not forever anyway. Soon… I won’t be allowed to want anything at all.”

Rose sighed, reaching across to cover my hand with hers. “What if he wants you too? What if he’s been waiting for you to see him?”

I scoffed, shaking my head. “He’s Leon. He wants bodies, not hearts. He wants me in his bed—not in his life. And honestly? That’s all I dare give him. I’m running out of time. Once they announce my fiancé… everything changes.”

I wanted him to come to me. To choose me. I’d never turn him away. But everyone kept stepping between us! First Rose in that elevator… now Tyler warning him off like I was property to be guarded. How was I ever meant to be chosen if they kept blocking the way?

Rose watched me for a long moment, then asked quietly, “Have you ever felt love at all? From your parents? From anyone?”

The question settled soft and heavy in my chest. I thought of cold dinners, separate bedrooms, polite conversations that never touched the heart. No. I’d never been loved. Not really.

“I honestly don’t know what love means,” I admitted, voice trembling.

Rose smiled—warm, tender, utterly sincere. “Then let me tell you. I love you, Ava. Even though we share no blood. Even though we haven’t known each other long. I love your strength, your heart, your stubbornness. I love every part of you—flaws, mistakes, and all. And I see you. Truly see you.”

Something warm and soft wrapped tight around my heart. My eyes burned, and I pulled her into a fierce, grateful hug. “Oh Rose… is that what love feels like?”

She laughed, gently pulling back to brush hair from my face. “That’s my love for you—as family, as a friend. It’s different when it’s the person you want to keep forever. That kind of love is… fierce. It’s choosing them again and again. It’s doing anything to make them happy—even if that means letting them go… or fighting the whole world to keep them. No one can define it for you. You just know it when you find it.”

“Wow…” I breathed. “That’s beautiful.”

Rose rolled her eyes playfully. “And you, my dear… are hopeless.”

I chuckled. She was right. I was indeed a hopeless case.

I stayed with them a few more days. Rose took me around Kyoto—ancient temples glowing gold at dawn, stone paths winding through quiet woods, the air scented with incense and rain. I’d been there before, surrounded by guides and schedules, but this time… it felt like wonder. I took photos of her, posted them online, and let the world see how lucky I was to have someone like her. Tyler was never like that—always pulling away, always jealous when I gave my attention to anyone but him. But since Rose came into our lives… he’d been quieter. Changed.

Then Mom called. Her voice was sharp, urgent. I booked my flight instantly—I knew better than to delay. Disobey once, and she’d freeze my cards. And I’d sooner walk barefoot than beg anyone for anything.

Back home, the lessons resumed. Cleaning, cooking, baking—measuring, stirring, kneading. I’d done simple things in grade school, but this was different. I was learning to care for someone. Slowly, surprisingly, I began to enjoy it. Even if my future husband never appreciated it… I was proud of what I could do. Something that didn’t come from a bank account. Something that was mine.

“Why didn’t I learn this before?” I asked Mom one afternoon, dusting flour from my hands while cookie dough chilled in the bowl.

She smiled softly. “Because you once said it was beneath you. That maids were paid to do it all.”

I winced. That was exactly what I’d told her. Spoiled, lazy, entitled me.

Mom wiped the counter with a cloth. “By the way… I heard Rose is coming back to the city.”

I paused. “She is?” It had been months since I visited them. Tyler had already returned home for good—and now Rose too? I thought she’d stay away. That she couldn’t bear to see Saint… or her former best friend.

Mom raised an eyebrow. “She’s here for business. Her company’s launching a major project. And you three are invited to the opening gala tonight. She has to be there—everyone’s been asking for her. She’s become quite the rising name.”

I smiled, a little sad. “Sometimes I wish I had her life. Something that belongs entirely to her.”

Mom fell quiet. When I glanced at her, she gave me a gentle, knowing smile. “You’ll learn to love the one you’re meant to marry, Avar. I’m sure he’s not hard to love. And perhaps… you’ll surprise yourself.”

I rolled my eyes. Love.

I still didn’t know what that was. Not really.

When lessons ended, I went straight to Rose’s project site. I knew the place—Grandpa had taken me there before. And sure enough, assistants and organizers were already hurrying her along, checking watches, urging her toward the gala. But I pulled her aside. “We go together. I’m not letting you face them alone.”

I dressed slowly, carefully. I knew he would be there. Leon. The last time I’d seen him in public, he’d been standing beside his ex-girlfriend—Tori, the one he’d loved for years. I’d watched them together, then drunk until the world blurred, waking up curled beside Rose, hollow and aching.

And there was more weighing on my mind. Kagami—one of Tyler’s flings from Japan—had arrived at our mansion, claiming she carried his child. No one knew the full truth but Rose. Tyler had fled back early, and I suspected he was running from more than just responsibility.

But tonight… tonight was my last chance. I’d overheard Mom and Dad speaking in hushed tones—my fiancé would be formally introduced to me, and to society, very soon. Once that happened… there would be no turning back. No more sneaking glances. No more wondering.

It was now or never.

Tonight, I would walk straight to him. And I prayed—with everything in me—that he wouldn’t turn me away.

“Looking stunning, Ava!” Tyler’s friends called out as I walked past them in the grand hall.

I offered a calm, confident smile. “Make way, please.”

They stepped aside, eyes following me—but I wasn’t here for them.

Then I saw him. Across the room, glass in hand, surrounded by people. As if he’d felt me the moment I stepped in… Leon turned his head.

His eyes locked onto mine.

And in that single look… I understood everything.

He wanted me.

Even with another woman standing close, her hand resting on his arm, his gaze never left mine. Dark. Certain. Hungry. And for the first time… I truly believed. Maybe, just maybe… he would choose me tonight.