56

ALINA

“You’re not who I expected you to be.” Jane shot me a glance.

I turned to her, unsure if that was a compliment. She sounded nice. But people like Cassandra also sound nice when they’re throwing daggers.

She must’ve seen the skeptical look I gave her because she chuckled.

“That’s a compliment,” she clarified. “You’re not what I expected because most of the people the Alpha…befriends,” she paused, as though the word left a bad taste, “they’re mostly real bitches. And they get a lot of plastic surgery.” she said with a small laugh. “We even made a joke about it. Said he only likes bitches. We ranked them by how nasty they were.”

She made a face.

“They got bitter, by the way.”

“How high up on that list is Cassandra?”

Jane shuddered, then gave me a once-over and nodded.

“Kind of high,” she admitted, probably just to make me feel better. “You’re lucky you’re very pretty, though. Actually, you’re hot. That helps. People wanted to hate Cassandra too, but she’s so…inspiring. You just end up loving her.”

“Does the Alpha love her?”

The words tasted bitter the moment they left my tongue.

Jane looked hesitant, and I quickly shook my head, trying to hide how my eyes were suddenly stinging. Like there was smoke in the air or something.

What the hell did that even mean?

“Not love,” she said firmly, as if that settled it.

And maybe it did. Almost.

“Frankly,” she added with a shrug, “I don’t think the Alpha loves anyone. But he does respect her more than all the other women who come around here.” She motioned vaguely around us.

I ignored the bile that rose in my throat when she said women. Plural.

Of course, I wasn’t under any illusion that he was some saint. He’s the Lycan King—one of the top five most feared beings in the world. Not to mention how hot he is. It should be illegal for him to look as good as he does.

If women weren’t throwing themselves at him, I’d be more concerned.

But it meant there were a lot of them. Women he’d touched. Women who knew things about him I probably never would. Women with experience I’d never have.

And me?

I had nothing to offer. No training. No skills. I haven’t even met my wolf yet, which just makes me a pathetic human in a wolf’s skin. The only things I know are from books and none of them taught me what to do to please a man like him.

“You shouldn’t worry, though. You have something none of them do. You’re his fated mate.”

I didn’t think that meant much, but I forced a smile anyway. The last thing I wanted was for her to say more things she thought were comforting because they weren’t. They only made me want to bury myself.

We reached the room and she opened the door. Her eyes lit up like she’d just stepped into heaven.

“Wow,” she whispered, awestruck.

I couldn’t even appreciate how beautiful the room was. Not because I was used to luxury but because everything she’d said left a sour taste in my mouth. I actually felt sick.

“This is the best room I’ve ever seen here.” She sighed as she ran her hands across the wall like it was sacred.

If I didn’t feel like throwing up, I might’ve agreed.

“If I were you, I wouldn’t sleep. I’d stay up all night just touching everything,” she said, then caught my blank expression and blushed. “I guess you’re used to this now. Doesn’t seem like anything special to you anymore.”

I thought back to the early days after I first got here. How huge the place seemed. How magical I thought it all was. But I never had the chance to enjoy any of it. I saw it all as a prison. I was terrified, constantly thinking I’d be killed.

Fear does that. It dims even the most beautiful place in the world.

“It’s really pretty,” I said, mostly for formality. “I haven’t seen anything like it.”

I didn’t want her to think I was stuck-up. Even though I was still lost in my thoughts, trying not to have a complete meltdown.

“You know, if you could really—”

The door creaked open and she stopped mid sentence.

Alexander walked in, and without saying anything else, he gave her one cold look and uttered a single word:

“Out.”

She practically ran.

The door shut behind her, but her words still echoed in my head.

I tried to seem confident. Calm. I tried not to let the things I’d just heard crawl under my skin.

But I was never good at hiding how I felt.

And one look at me, and I knew he could already see what I wasn’t saying.

“Now,” his voice was low and husky, “where did we stop?”

I didn’t need to ask what was on his mind. The way he was looking at me said it all.

And though he didn’t ask what I was thinking, it looked like he might. For a second.

I told myself I was glad he didn’t.

But then my heart did that weird thing again.

And my eyes stung, for no reason at all.