Tristan and I have been running the morning training drills, continuing to work on different ways we can fight the lycan even if they have the strength and size. We need to do everything we can to minimise the loss of life on our side. Several pack members from the different packs here because of Shayne join in. We seem lucky that everyone is blending together well, focusing on the coming war instead of picking fights over small differences. It occurs to me that we could be creating something really special here. The biggest alliance in wolf history if everyone continues to get along. More wolves have arrived, from Shayne's allies, Eclipse & from Blood Moon. The numbers we have ready to fight the lycan are unheard of, all we can do is hope that's it's enough. As we train Aiden mind links me. 'We need to talk' His voice serious. 'Can it wait?' I ask, 'Not really. We are finishing up here, then need to get cleaned up. One hour, main room. Bring Tristan & Nathanial' I look up to Trista
As I close my door gently. Trying not to bring anymore attention to myself then what has already happened today, the grief threatening to completely overwhelm me. The moment her neck snapped I felt a piece of me die with her. I understand how Tristan and Armina feel, but they don't know how much she meant to me. Growing up Tristan and I were never allowed to have friends. It was just each other. That didn't help my self-esteem considering I was always comparing myself to Tristan and feeling inadequate. Tristan had clearly taken on the big brother role and as much as I wanted not to be the weak little brother, I wasn't able to measure up. Every time I screwed up and he took control I wanted to object, I wanted to take ownership, but I would always freeze. The 'freeze and nod' I would always call it in my mind, which was always the exact moment when I'd hear our father's voice boom our names. Fear would always take over and no matter how much I'd try to fight against it, I was never a
It's hard being angry at Nathanial. Every part of my being has been so used to protecting him, to taking any consequences meant for him on myself. But to he honest I don't think I would even if I could this time. Armina is a goddess, everything about her has me completely hooked and I couldn't risk losing her for anyone, not even Nathanial. Seeing her in that much pain when Nathanial mated with Sarah was the closest to hate I have ever felt towards my brother, the only time I have ever thrown hands at him out of rage. I hated it. But I couldn't bare what he had done to her. Not just that. Every single beating I had, I tried to internalise the pain. Convince myself I deserved it to not give our father the pleasure of watching me cry or beg. I got so good at it, pain barely even phased me anymore. I could have been beaten to death and probably still wouldn't have cared. There were several times I thought our father was going to go too far, Cole sure he wasn't going to be able to heal
Tristan is silent as we walk holding my hand tightly. We don't say it but I think both of us are really grateful no one will be up for an hour or so. Both of us needing time to process what has happened, what this means for all of us. If Nathanial has wanted to be forgiven he has gone about it in the worse way possible. With Tristan still radiating rage as he walks over to the shower turning it to hot and turning back to me. "I'm sorry" He whispers, his voice broken as his forehead leans against mine. His eyes closed as he breathes our scent. "You have nothing to be sorry for" I state. "I should have known, I don't understand how I missed something like this" he mumbles, heartbroken. "Tristan stop" I order, "Look at me" I order. He obeys, always respecting anything I ask of him. His eyes meeting mine, still showing anger but also fear. "This is NOT your fault, it was never your fault and you are not going to punish yourself for his choices, do you under
I try to breathe as Tristan comes up behind me. "What is it?" He asks. I hand it to him. He smells and knows instantly too. His alpha sense of smell recognising the ingredients just as I do. He growls. He turns back towards the hallway. Finding a crying Sarah on the ground with Nathanial watching over her. He throws the bag at Nathanial. Who smells it, he looks confused as he looks between us and Sarah. "She dosed you" Tristan growls. Tristan collects Sarah off the ground by her throat again. "Why?" He growls. "I love him" Sarah cries. "Where is Mira now?" I ask, she shakes her head. "I won't tell, she was just doing what I asked' she yells. "It doesn't matter" Tristan and Cole growl together, united, "She dishonoured our Luna and attempted to use dark magic to gain leadership within our pack, there is only one punishment" they continue. I know what's coming and don't move, Nathanial realises too late as Tristan's hand on her throast moves, twisting violently as a loud sickeni
Tristan is growling. His wolf Cole pulsating rage while Tristan tries to calm him. "It doesn't make sense, he wouldn't" Tristan paces. The pain within me has subsided. Aurora is certain of what we felt. She's also noticing that Nathanial is able to shield himself better from us more than any other we've ever known. Even better than Tristan when he tries to hide how much danger he is in from me. There is something we're missing. I'm hesitant to approach this with Tristan. He has spent his whole life protecting him. Putting his own health, wellbeing and life on the line to ensure his safety.I feel a sense of loss and betrayal. Yet something else. If Tristan had of done this I would be broken beyond repair. My bond with him is stronger, it goes deep within me, right down to my soul. It hasn't been that way with Nathanial, something I hadn't allowed myself to acknowledge before, not wanting to think of what that means. There were clearly secrets that Nathanial was keeping, beyond his