DARK DESIRES

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ALESSIA POV

"The reality of life sets in when you realize that things doesn't work the way you planned it to, It occurs,You don't have to lose hope, Miss Alessia"

I listened to his normal rants and motivational quotes to make me feel better which only worsened it. I just want to leave this hell of a place and rest my head on the bed to blubber, Sob and cry as usual.

Life has been so unfair to me. My mom, who was my only hope, remarried and abandoned me four months ago. I had to apply for a scholarship and eventually got transferred here to continue my study since I couldn't sponsor myself anymore.

This is the time I needed Dad the most but I only had the chance to spend ten years with him. He died twelve years ago the day after my birthday party.

I found myself becoming better, Crawling out of my lonely world few months ago, Finally getting out of that fucked up in a lonely shell, I started going to house parties, drinking alcohol responsibly, and going out on a few dates not until mom announced to the whole family that she's getting married.

I became so lonely, Broken, Financially handicapped,I don't have any money on me, No financial support since my mom got married to the mysterious man,I fell into depression weeks ago, I had no other choice than to spend my savings on buying antidepressants and book an appointment with one of the best counselor.

That's the only last thing I could do, But I guessed a therapy session doesn't work for everyone, I think I'm part of the unfortunate ones.

"Miss. Alessia, Can you listen to me?"He tapped the table softly,I nodded before letting out a fake smile, The frequent fake smiles I do give him.

He sighed softly and dropped his glasses, I was able to check his features well.

He should be in his late forties, His brown orbs rolled dramatically as he counseled me, He looked more like an American than Italian.

I nodded at intervals trying to assimilate whatever he's saying. I wished I could stop him but that would be too rude.

"Why can't things work out the way we want?,why does it have to be so?"I asked and he let out a nervous laugh.

"We can't have all what hoped for,Life gets uninteresting"

"Uninteresting?It's tiring now,"I grumbled. He placed his elbow on the table and stared at me keenly.

"Stop bottling all the emotions,you should let it out,It's okay for you to cry,Stop trying to act like you're strong, You're just two years above twenty but you've faced some shits you shouldn't have went through,Don't you think it will be too cruel for you to bottle them up again?, When you can actually let all your emotions out"He said softly, I felt my eyes glittered, Holding whatever I can get hold off to stop me from crying, Fu*ck!, This won't end well.

"I got tired of crying,It doesn't work anymore"I cracked, My voice came out with tiny sobs, The tears slipped down my face again.

Damn!

"You're resuming school tomorrow, Make new friends, Try to be more outspoken, Get outta that shell, Look for part time jobs to keep yourself busy, It surely helps"He pressed a little further, I nodded slowly, I honestly don't want to press this more further, This will be the last time I will be coming to his office for counseling, My session expired already.

"I will do that, Thank you"I mumbled before walking out of the office after handing me the new drugs prescribed for me.