THIS IS INAPPROPRIATE

SIMON’S POV

Days passed in a blur.

The more I drank and longed that once I opened my eyes at the start of each new day that somehow, I would see Anika back to me, with that sweet smile on her face.

This time I would treat her right.

But alas, each day when I woke up, all I got was heart ache and a banging headache… no Anika.

Today was no different from those other days.

 “Fuck!”

I sat up holding my head. It was aching badly from all the alcohol that I had consumed yesterday. Suddenly bitter bile filled my throat. I put a hand over my mouth before rushing to the toilet and bending over t empty all the contents of my stomach.

My throat burned  but the vomit just kept on coming until there was nothing left in my stomach, not like I even ate much these days anyways.

I washed my face with cold water before examining myself in front of the mirror.

I looked a mess.

I was pale and dark circles covered my eyes… then there was that overgrown stubble that I was yet to take care of. And the shirt I was wearing, how long had it even been since I had a good shower?

At this point I could not even keep track of myself anymore.

When Anika was there with me, she always made sure that I was goods and well taken care of.

I took that for granted and I would pay for that for the rest of my life.

That painful feeling came to my chest again, the one that made it seem almost impossible to breathe whenever I thought about her.

I dragged myself out of the bathroom.

My phone began to ring and I picked it up without even looking.

“Who is it” I said.

“Simon,”

The moment I heard Bree’s voice I groaned “I don’t have time for this” I said.

“Please, l need to talk to you Simon” she said.

I heaved a sigh.

I still had a soft spot for Bree. She had a weak heart, and all of these things that had been going on, especially with her sister… she must also be going through so much.

“Ok where do we meet?”

 She sniffed “do you want to come over to my place?” she asked.

I could not help but think about the last time that I was at her place… Grace and I had a quarrel and I just, I drank too much and then I betrayed my marriage with Anika.

Guilt washed over me instantly.

I would never let myself be put into that situation again.

“I’ll have a driver pick you up, lets meet at a cafe” I said.

“But you always used to-”

I cut her off “I will see you there Bree” I said and then I hung up.

I don’t know but I could not help but feel a certain kind of guilt when it came to Bree. She was right. I was the one who chose her that day over Anika, and now I had to live without her.

There was also this feeling of guilt whenever I look at Bree and wish it was never her that I chose that day.

I forced myself to take a shower and got dressed in a simple black tee and grey pants.

“Get the car ready Manuel and send someone to pick Bree up” I said.

“Yes Sir” he bowed and left.

I took a bottle of water from the fridge since I couldn’t even bear the sight of a cup of coffee talk less of actual food right now.

We soon pulled up at Seasview Café.

Bree was already waiting there, sipping on a glass of milkshake when I walked in. her eyes brightened the moment that she spotted me.

“Simon” she stood up and hugged me “I was sacred you would not come” she said.

My entire body went stiff, I made no move to hug her back.

“Let’s sit” I said.

When we took a seat, it was silent for a while. Bree just kept on fiddling with her fingers and biting her lip. That was beginning to make me feel uneasy as well.

“You wanted to see me” I said.

She nodded “You have been distant with me Simon and I understand what happened, but I miss you” she said.

“This is not appropriate Bree” I said.

She looked up at me “why?”

“Because your sister is my wife” I said.

She looked up at me “Anika is gone!” she said “what will it take for you to move on hmm”

“Never. Anika is not dead, I willhold on until she is back” I said.

She scoffed “you never cared this much about her before so what exactly changed with you?” she asked.

I stayed silent and she took it as a sing to continue “if you feel guilty then don’t it was not your fault-”

I stood up the chair scraping across the ground “I can’t do this” I said my chest was heaving and I was trying my best to keep my temper in check.

How could Bree just say these things?

It was like Anika meant nothing to her.

She stood up as well with tears me her eyes. Everyone was looking at us murmuring and I think I even caught someone bring out their phone t video. Not to worry though, Manuel will take care of them later. The last thing I needed was a scandal like the one that happened on the burial day.

 “When will you ever choose me?” she asked.

I removed my had from hers “Anika is he woman that I got married to you will never replace her Bree so just save your breath”

She let the tears fall freely now “I need you Simon” she said.

“I understand that you are still trying to cope with the loss of your sister Bree, but clinging to me is not the way, you will find someone else”

 She grabbed my both hands again, frantic this time. “I don’t want anyone else… if I can’t have you I will die Simon I mean it”

 “Stop it!” I dragged my hands away from her hold “what has gotten into you?”

Her breathing suddenly became uneven, rapid and shallow.

 For a second, I froze.

Shit.

Bree had a weak heart, why did I have to raise my voice at her when she was already under so much stress?

“Bree?”

She held her chest “it… it hurts Simon”

Her eyes fluttered, and before I could react, her body went limp.

I caught her just in time.

“Damn it,” I muttered, lifting her slightly to keep her from hitting the ground.

“Get the car ready, Manuel,” I called out sharply. “We are taking her to the hospital.”