CHAPTER FOUR

LENA

*THREE DAYS LATER* 

I've been unable to focus in Mr Knight's class, because all I can think about is him. If only there was a way I could avoid going to his class or maybe I should talk to the authorities of the university and get myself transfered to my old class.

Would that even work?

I sighed in defeat and brought out my journal. It's been a therapeutic way for me to deal with my fantasy and not do anything crazy in two lives like kissing Mr Knight like I almost did in my dream.

It's crazy. The man has done nothing but frustrate me since I joined his class. I should detest him, but I couldn't deny that he's very hot and maybe that's why I was so attracted to him.

“What are you writing?” Someone sneaked up behind me. I looked up to see the red haired girl that sat beside me in literature class.

Her eyes suddenly lit up. “Is that smut?” She immediately sat down beside me, putting her food next to mine on the table.

I closed my book immediately, feeling very embarrassed but she was rather intrigued and eager to see. “Who are you writing about? I'm not surprised you're a poet, but erotic poetry? That's naughty.”

She giggled, filling the warmth in my heart, but more importantly, she didn't judge me like I thought she would. I enjoyed writing erotic poems but was always scared to share them because people would think it's wrong.

“You don't think I'm weird?” I asked, trying to fight back the smile on my face. 

She shook her head. “Not at all. Infact, I think you're bold and creative, I'd love to eat any of your poems that's if you're up for it.”

I nodded, unable to fight back the smile on my face. “I'm Lena by the way,” I introduced myself, stretching forth my hands.

She giggled. “Who doesn't know about the famous Lena? The professor's arc nemesis. Both of you are like cats and rats.”

That fascinated me and I wanted to add something but my alarm went off, signifying that it was time for literature class. I'd have to face Mr Knight again. “We better get going or Mr Knight would give me loads of assignments to work on.”

She laughed. “Your relationship with the professor is a bit strange but I can totally tell that there's some kind of tension between the both of you.”

My heart immediately skipped a beat at her statement. “Tension? What kind of tension?” I asked, trying to control the pounding in my chest.

“I don't know yet because Mr Knight is a strict man, but all I can say is, I'd love to see how this goes.”

We walked down the hallways together, but my mind was still unable to do away with what she said. What tension? Was it that obvious that I had a crush on him? I mean, who wouldn't? He's a ten. But also a pain in the ass, but yet I'm obsessed.

We entered class and as usual, Mr Knight was already on his seat, waiting for us. My breath hitched when our eyes met. I tried to avert my gaze from his, ignoring the pounding of my heart in my chest.

He started teaching, but I was already focused on the text in front of me, reading through the page he's teaching on. I glanced up and found him staring at me, my heart skipped a beat.

He didn't look away and others didn't seem to notice. I wanted to look away so bad but was unable to for some reasons. He smirked and returned his attention back to the text.

What was that all about?

                       *************

The next morning, I couldn’t focus on anything else.

I had barely slept. All I kept thinking about was my journal. The poems. The thoughts. The fantasies.

Everything was inside that small book. Everything I didn’t want anyone to ever see.

My fingers tremble slightly as I clutched my bag and hurried toward the literature hall.

Please still be there. Please no one found it. Please.

I pushed open the classroom door, heart thumping against my chest. It was still early, and thankfully, the room was mostly empty.

My eyes immediately darted to my desk. And there it was. Lying just where I had left it yesterday.

“Thank God, it'd be so embarrassing having it plastered all over the news page. I definitely wouldn't want to live to see the next day.”

My chest rose and fell in relief. I rushed over and picked it up gently, almost hugging it to myself. But as I moved to open the first page and check if everything was still inside, something slipped out.

Oh no!

Someone went through it. They found out all about my dirty secrets, what if they secretly took a picture and plan to use it later? I knew I wasn't safe yet.

A piece of paper. Folded once. My breath caught. I reached down and picked it up slowly.

Unfolded it.

Five words were written in clear, firm handwriting:

“Careless girls shouldn’t write such dirty things.”

I stared at the note. My heart froze. I read it again.

“Careless girls shouldn’t write such dirty things.”

My fingers tightened around the edges of the paper. Someone had read it. Someone had gone through the pages.

My private thoughts.

My poems.

The ones I wrote about him. They'd know about my secret obsession for my professor and I'd become the laughing stock of the school. “This cannot be happening.”

Heat crept up my neck. My stomach twisted painfully with embarrassment and fear. Who could’ve done this?

Who saw?

I slowly looked at the handwriting again.

It wasn’t messy. It was clean. Neat. Confident.

The way the letters leaned ever so slightly. The sharp way the "t" was crossed. The careful spacing.

I had seen this before. My eyes widened. My fingers trembled. I knew this handwriting.

It was…Mr. Knight’s.