42

Talking to Nazar was surprisingly easy and pleasant. He has a subtle sense of humor with a touch of sarcasm, he’s intelligent, tactful, smart, and insanely charismatic. I like listening to him, like the atmosphere that forms when he’s around. Like we’ve known each other forever, and I feel… safe with him.

Nazar told me he owns a motorcycle showroom and several repair services. That explains his style, that reckless brutal biker vibe, the classic bad boy look. Occupational hazard, I guess.

I have to admit… I really liked him. Not just his looks. There’s this incredible positive energy coming off him… and sexual energy too.

He kept looking at me in a way that sent goosebumps down my skin. Like with that piercing gaze, he could touch me, stroke me without even laying a hand on me. He behaved properly, almost too properly… but those green eyes betrayed a whole volcano of lust and unspoken promises. And that heat rose straight to my cheeks… and not only there.

During our walk, Nazar was very romantic. We talked a lot, he told me about his ex-wife and what happened between them. And the same thought kept pounding in my head… how the hell could someone leave a man like that, with kids? How blind do you have to be not to see how incredible he is, inside and out? Or maybe… you really can’t command your heart.

I felt so good with Nazar. So good that for a second… I even let myself imagine that maybe I’d want something with him. That maybe with him, I could be small, weak, a girl protected by a fierce dragon from the whole world. I wanted so badly to be fragile next to him, to give myself a chance… but I’ve lied too much. And the truth about me? A serious man like him won’t like it.

No matter how many admirers I have, they all see me the same way. As a means for physical pleasure. Something exotic, desirable… like a beautiful trophy you want at least once, but nothing more. Girls like me don’t get relationships. And I don’t need them anyway, so I don’t blame men for it. I share their view. And I can’t drag Nazar into my hopeless swamp called “life” for several reasons.

“Nazar… hug me.”

I wanted it so badly, to just lean into him, feel warmth, feel some kind of support, that the words slipped out before I could think.

And he did. Held me tight. I buried my nose in his chest, breathing in his scent. It felt so good… so right in his arms.

Nazar confessed he liked me, though I already knew. I’m not lacking in looks, and the fire in his eyes spoke for itself. But unlike most men, he wanted to know me. To win me over, like normal people do when they want something real. If he knew I was a stripper, he probably wouldn’t try this hard. He’d be like the rest, just trying to get into my panties as fast as possible.

Not that Nazar doesn’t want to. I can feel it in his tight embrace. But he holds himself back. And that’s… nice, in a way. That he doesn’t push, doesn’t insist outright.

I wanted him to kiss me so badly… and he brushed my lips with his, slow and careful. If only he knew how everything inside me flipped upside down at that moment.

I melted in his hands. Something strange, nervous, fluttering stirred in my chest. Nazar deepened the kiss, and damn, the man knew what he was doing.

Truth is, not every man can actually kiss well. Most think they can. They’re wrong. Same with sex. On words, they’re p**n stars. In reality, they’re obsessed with their own mediocre pleasure, completely ignoring their partner. No imagination, no effort to even find a woman’s erogenous zones. Foreplay? Don’t even get me started.

From slow and exploring, the kiss quickly turned deep, greedy, wet, dirty… just the way I like it.

Everything inside me was already burning. I was ready to give myself to him right there, in front of dozens of witnesses… but I stopped myself in time, cursing myself for ending that madness.

Nazar walked me home. Well… not my home. One of Ksyusha’s regular sponsors rents her a vip apartment so he can sneak around behind his wife’s back. My friend isn’t greedy, so sometimes I use the place too, though rarely. Most of my meetings happen at the club. But I have spare keys.

I don’t know why I brought Nazar here. Maybe I didn’t want to open up too much. Or maybe… deep down, I wanted him to come upstairs with me.

But instead, we kissed like teenagers and agreed to meet again tomorrow.

Because tonight… I have another shift at the club.