Chapter 3: Please don't

I am heading towards the church now. I am about to get late to Stanley’s baptism. That boy is so cute. He inherited it from his parents. Khloie is pretty, while Sceven is handsome. Their combination is so good. I am really happy for them.

Hay! When will I get settled down like my best friend?

I shake my head with that. How can I settle down when I still can’t move on? Ok… no, I shouldn’t think about him.

When I reached the church, I parked my car and get inside. It is not starting yet because other godmothers and godfathers are still not here. 

The only one who is required to go here in church are the godmothers and godfathers. While other visitor can go straight to the food venue. 

Me, Jace, Hyrie, and some are already here. I am so glad that they did not make Kurt as Stanley’s godfather. 

They are planning to make him one to their second child. Oh right. Amazing. There are no second baby on the way yet but there is already a godfather. 

“Let’s see each other at our house, Joyce,” Khloie said after the event and kissed my cheeks.

 

Sceven quickly removed Khloie from me and gave me a boring look. I shake my head because of that. My gosh, Sceven! Even to me you are jealous? So possessive to Khloie. 

Khloie waved her hands to me and enter their car.

I also entered my car and start the engine of it. The venue of the celebration is in their house. I am sure that it is pompous because Sceven is the first grandchild of Abellano and Sandoval. I can imagine how glamorous it is when his birthday celebration come.

 

When I reached their house, I saw everyone who knows Khloie and Sceven. Even our former classmates are there. 

And of course, this one will not gonna slide. “Joyce,” Klei shouted. 

I raised my one eyebrow on him. Ah why do he need to shout my name? Now we get the attention of others. 

He walks towards me and place his arm over my shoulder. “Let’s eat,” he said and pulled me. 

I roam my eyes around. I stop when I saw Kurt looking so serious while looking at us. 

He is sitting beside Sceven. They are drinking alcohol now. Oh, why he is not with that clown? Gosh, I am so bitter. I just shrugged my shoulders off.  

Klei stops me when we are in front of the buffet. I also saw Wi there with Hyrie, her cousin. They are really close to each other now. 

After placing foods on our plates, we sat at the table near to Kurt’s. Fvcker. Is Klei intentionally do this?

I just simply rolled my eyeballs and start to eat. Klei is so busy telling me things, that is why I can’t help but not to laugh. Especially to his jokes. I even saw Kurt taking a glimpse to us. 

After eating, Klei told me that he will just answer his phone because someone is calling him. 

I stand up and walk around. Sceven and Khloie’s house is so nice. I headed towards the fountain and just stared at the water. 

Time passes by and Klei said that he needs to go home already. His brother is coming home from another country. 

It is already night. The moon starts to show up. The visitors are already gone. The one who only stayed are us, group of friends. 

I moved to Wi and get Stan from her. I played with the cute baby and make him laugh. Ah, he is so cute and handsome. I really want to pinch but he might cry so no. 

Wi sat beside her husband. While I stay in another table with Stan. The baby is not allowed there. He will smell the alcohol. So bad. 

I am just playing with Stan for so many minutes. When he is sleepy, Khloie gets him from me. I decided to go with them to their room. 

“So how are you?” my best friend asked while putting Stan on the crib. 

I just smiled and shrug my shoulders off. “Here. Still pretty,” I joked. 

She slaps my arms slightly. “Crazy you. I am talking about your love life.”

“Still can’t move on. It is too hard.”

She stared at me. “Argh! I will really pull Kurt’s hair if I have the chance. I know that he is still the one in your heart, Joyce. But why don’t you try to love other man?”

“I don’t know, Wi. Maybe I will just focus on moving on and to my career.”

We changed the topic after that and just tell stories about any things. 

I headed outside and decided to relax first. I will not go home today; we will have overnight here. The whole group. Meaning that Kurt will also stay here. 

When I reached the first floor, I saw them still drinking. They are just chilling tho.

Anya called me so I don’t have any choice but to join them. I saw that the only vacant seats are on the sides of Sceven and Kurt. And Khloie is approaching us, meaning that she will take the sit near her husband. 

I don’t have any choice but to sit with Kurt. 

I held my breathe. Why does fate do this to me?

I can even smell him. So fragrant. I can smell him all day long. 

They give me five shots. But I am still aware on what I am doing. I don’t want to get wasted anymore. The last time I get wasted, I reached Kurt’s condo. I will be embarrassed if I will do that again

“So when are you planning to give Stan a brother?” Jace asked to the wedded couple.

I saw how Khloie’s face turned to red. She hides her face on Sceven’s chest. 

“My Khloie is so shy,” Sceven said to Jace. 

I laughed with what he said. Reason why Kurt looks at me. 

I gulped when he stays doing that. He is intently staring at me. I don’t want to assume but I noticed that he is always bat an eye to me. 

He met my eyes and didn’t bother to avoid my gaze. After a minute I surrendered. 

Why it is like that? Why I am feeling butterflies on my stomach with his stares.

“How about you Jace? When will you get married to Anya?” Wi asked. 

I turned my head to Anya. I saw a pain in her eyes. There is something wrong. I just can’t figure it out right now.

“Maybe next year,” Jace answered and drink the alcohol straightly. 

I stood up and excuse myself to go to the comfort room. 

When I reached the comfort room, I wash my face. I am so drunk now. I need to slow down or best is to stop drinking.

When I headed outside my eyes widened because someone pulled me. With his smell, I know too well who is he. Kurt. 

He stops when we reached the guest room. When we get in, he pushed me. My back is in the door now. 

“Kurt,” I warned. 

He didn’t speak and instead move his face closer to mine. And now I can smell his breathe. 

I look back at his eyes. It feels like I am drowning to the way he stares at me. It makes my knees tremble. 

“Are you in relationship with Klei?” he asked. 

My forehead creased. Does he really think that I have a relationship with my friend?

I don’t know, but I kinda feel happy right now. If he is asking me about that, does it mean that it is bothering him? Is he still have feelings for me?

I sighed. “And what is it to you if we are already in a relationship?” I seriously asked. 

The expression on his face changed. 

He made his face even closer to mine. “Tell me that you and that boy are not in a relationship. You are not together,” he pleaded. 

“And if we were?”

He closes his eyes tightly and after that he suddenly grab my nape and kissed me. The way he kisses me is so harsh. 

After a second, I can taste blood. He stops when he realizes that my lips are bleeding. 

“Sorry,” he said and gave me a smack kiss. “I am so sorry that I made you lips bleed. It just that... please tell me that you don’t have relationship with that Klei,” he said and pressed his forehead to mine. 

I stayed quiet. The way he kisses me earlier made my heart aches. He never kissed me like that. I want to cry right now because of that. I feel like he really changed. 

I look at the ground and pushed him. After that, I headed to the bed and lay there. 

There’s no sense in going out. He is in front of the door and I know that he will not let me go outside. 

He heavily sighed and made a step towards me. 

I sat and look at him. “Kurt, what happened to us? Why is it like this?” I asked in my trembling voice. 

He just quietly stared at me. Waiting for me to continue what I am saying. 

“Do you know that I am so envy to you? Why? Because you moved on so fast. You changed me so quickly. And here I am, still stuck. Still in love with you,” I said while crying. 

He didn’t answer me. 

“You know what? I don’t really know why you left me. Is it because I can’t give myself to you or is it because you don’t love me anymore? Or worst you didn’t even love me. I really want to move forward; I really want to forget you.”

I stand up and walked away. I am so confused to him. He acts like he still has feelings for me. But I know that is too impossible. He has a girlfriend. He has Dessery.

 

I am just part of his past that he forgot. I thought we will be together until the future. But no. Never. 

I was about to open the door when I felt him hugging me from my back. “Please don’t. Don’t forget me. I cannot accept that. I’m begging you, Joyce Clara. Don’t forget me,” he said and kissed my hair. 

I turned around to face him. And when I faced him, he kissed me. And now I can feel the sincerity on it. I can feel the love, the longing.