Chapter 5

𝐻𝐴𝑁𝑁𝐴𝐻

For a few seconds, I didn't know what exactly to say to him. This man had Jacob’s sharp jawline, Jacob’s dark eyes, and Jacob’s towering frame—yet looking at him felt like staring at a stranger wearing my husband’s skin.

​The only thing he lost was his memories, so why did it feel like his entire soul had been wiped clean?

This wasn't the Jacob I knew. He sounded and acted different all at the same time.

Where was the Jacob who wanted to divorce me so badly, but was only waiting for me to say the word?

But still... it wasn't going to change my mind. I was really done with him, and the last thing I wanted was to be dragged back into the dark sorrowful pit he had kept me for years.

​"You don't have the right to make decisions for me, Jacob!" I gasped out. "You might've done that in the past, but I won't let you control my life like it's yours! So let go of me!" I thrashed,  as I struggled to break free from his grip.

​"I won't sign the divorce papers even if you bring tons of them to my feet, Hannah," he said, his voice laced with a desperate, disoriented plea that made my stomach turn. "You acting this way is making me curious. What kind of a husband was I to you? I need to know how badly I hurt you for you to be so determined to walk away."

​"You hurt me badly, Jacob! You broke me to the point where I laid awake at night wishing I had never been born! You never gave me a single reason to smile. You were never a husband to me. We were just two hollow strangers trapped in the same house!" I yelled.

​Jacob's eyes widened, a flicker of genuine shock and horror passing over his face as he slowly let go of my hand. "I... I don't believe that. I don't believe I could be that kind of monster."

I chuckled bitterly, cleaning my tears before it could fall down to my cheek. . "You don't even remember who you are, and you think you know what you're capable of doing? You were worse than everything I just said!"

A wave of humiliation and old heartbreak choked my voice, but I forced the words out through a quiet sniffle. "Chloe has always been the one you wanted. She's the woman you love, the one you should have married if I hadn't stupidly lured you into marrying me. There... I said it all."

​I swallowed down the lump in my throat, wrapping my arms tightly around myself to stop the shaking. "You're finally getting what you always wanted. A life with Chloe. I'm sure once you get close to her again, you'll remember she's the only one who ever mattered to you. I already moved out while you were still in a coma. Let's just cooperate and end this misery. I'll be back tomorrow with new divorce papers," I said, turning my back on him before the pain could swallow me whole.

This was what I wanted.

I badly wanted to be free from him, free from of everyone tied to his life.

I opened my car ready to leave, but Jacob appeared suddenly, closing the door.

"What more explanation do you still need, Jacob?" I asked, getting frustrated.

​"I need time, Hannah," he implored.

"What do you mean?" I muttered.

​"Even if all you said is true, it still feels wrong... like I could never be that kind of husband to you," he whispered. "I won't force you to live with me. But... give me a chance to earn your forgiveness. Let me try to make up for all the horrible things I did."

​I stared at him, my brain short-circuiting. "Are you out of your mind? Do you think my life is a game?! What happens when your memory returns tomorrow, huh? You just flip a switch and turn back into an unfeeling bastard?!"

​"I don't know, Hannah. I don't know who I am. I look in the mirror and I see a stranger  I don't know if I'm capable of those horrible things, but seeing you bleed like this breaks something inside me. Please... just give me a chance. Please."

Jacob... just said please.

He had never apologize to me. Not even when he was wrong. He'd always pin everything on me, blaming me for bounding him to a marriage he never wanted.

​Where was his towering arrogance? Where was the icy condescension that used to make my blood run cold?

​Where did the real Jacob go?

​"Hannah..." He took a hesitant step closer, his hand reaching out toward me.

​"Don't touch me!" I barked, shoving my hand up to create a wall between us as I scrambled back a step. "Don't you dare use your convenient amnesia to play the tragic hero! I am not falling for this act, Jacob. We are getting divorced."

​"I am only asking for a chance to make up for what I don't even remember," he pleaded, his voice dropping into a desperate whisper. "Let me remember."

​"You can remember all you want from a distance," I snapped.

​"You can't force me to sign those papers, Hannah," he stated.

​A harsh, humorless laugh escaped my lips. I took a step closer, staring straight into those dark, unfamiliar eyes.

​"Then watch me do it, Jacob."

I threw myself into the driver's seat, slammed the door shut, and stomped on the gas pedal. 

Tires screeched against the gravel as I tore through the gates of his estate.

​In my side mirror, his tall figure shrank into the distance, standing alone and  watching me leave. 

I ripped my gaze away, gripping the steering wheel.

He wanted my forgiveness?

 What a cruel, sick joke.

I had nearly died loving Jacob Lancaster once. 

I would never, ever let him crawl back into my life again.