Don’s Frenzy of Regret After Her Death

I pushed the white window curtain in our room sidewards to check the weather outside. The environment was dark and shady as the sun was covered by full gray clouds. Dry orange leaves scattered along the way and the trees were lifeless, taken by the cold breeze of winter. It's the first week of December and everyone was preparing for the winter season. However, we are doing different. We are scheduled to go to the Philippines for one and a half weeks of Barack's business deal. 

Not even a single plan of me to go back there as I have left a lot of miseries and memories. But, as Barack's former secretary and his fiancée, I have to go with him as a support and assistance to a place foreign to him. He has been so good to me and to my son, Ethan since I have met him. I think he deserves my full support even if it would cause me to reminisce my past. 

I heaved a deep sigh, pulled back the curtain and fixed the collar of my white turtle neck long sleeve top tucked with black fitted jeans and black tassel loafer with a combination of white on the front. I stepped my foot on the way to the full length mirror and fixed my light brown wavy hair flowing down to my shoulders then tucked it to my ears. I forced a smile before grabbing the winter blazer on the coat hanger beside me. Just in time, the door opened exposing our personal assistant, Elaine. 

"Are you ready, Yzabelle?" she asked, walking inside the room, dragging our suitcase. I smiled at her and said, "Yeah, maybe. I was just excited to see our homeland. Please bring the suitcases down and I'll check my son there." 

She immediately nodded and did what was told. Elaine is also a Filipina like me who went here in Italy to work. I met her three years ago and decided to hire her as our house keeper and assistant to look after my son, instead. She knew my story and was the same as me with her. I didn't see her only as our helper but also as my friend and companion. Same as well with Charlotte, my friend who helped me to strive here. The two of them filled the emptiness and longing of my friends in the Philippines, Lily and Celestine. 

I was already in the doorstep of Ethan's room when I heard a loud bang inside. I hurriedly reached for the cold steel door knob, twisted it and pushed the door open. I groaned when a basketball ball bounced from the ground to my lower chest. 

"Sorry, Mom!" Ethan apologised before chasing the ball and took a jump shot, throwing the ball in the air. 

"Bingo!" he yelled when it shot into the rim of his mini basketball court in his room. 

Ethan was just five years old but was acting like he was ten or twelve. He was a cute young man who loves basketball like his deceased father. I wasn't wrong in giving him the same name as his dad's for they have alike attitudes and faces. 

He dribbled the ball with pride while wearing his customized basketball uniform with a print 'Ethan' at the back. I don't know what exactly to react while watching him wearing his winter clothes and shoes underneath his uniform and spiky hair. 

"Ethan! Why are you wearing like that? Stop playing. Your Dada Barack is waiting down below," I said, chasing his orange round ball. 

He stepped back and crossed over me then made another shot. "Bingo!" he cheered. "See that, Mom? I'm a star!" he continued. I smirked at him and patted his head. 

"Come on now, baby. We're in a hurry," I told him and pulled his upper uniform up. 

He held my hand and squinted his eyes at me. "I can do it, Mom. I'm big now and I will change my clothes quickly," he assured. 

I was about to contradict his decision when the door suddenly cracked open.

"Yzabelle, Sir Barack is asking if we're good to go now," Elaine said, chasing her breath. I nodded at her and pinched my son's cheek. Elena was still really afraid of Barack when he was in a hurry. Such a time conscious half-italian man. 

"I'll go back down and assist this little man fixing himself. Okay?" I instructed her which she immediately agreed with. I took a glance at Ethan and shot him a face. "Ethan, make it fast or else I will not let you see your grandparents when we arrive there," I said. 

He stood straight and motioned his right hand at the side of his eyebrow, making a salute. "Yes, Mom! Just a minute!" he gasped. 

I curved my lips upward and left them in his room alone. Last time, Ethan didn't want to go with us. His nonsense reason? He's tired. So, I told him that he would meet his grandparents there which excites him to go with us. For many years, he was asking me where his dad and grandparents were but I could not answer and explain to him everything. Instead, I introduced Barack, who was my boyfriend that time, as his dad. 

The bored Barack sitting on the couch with his all black suit, gray winter jacket hung on his shoulder, legs crossed and right arm rested on the couch's arm rest while checking the time on his wrist watch welcomed me downstairs. 

"Amore Mio (My Love), Ethan was just changing his clothes and we're good to go," I distracted him. 

He lifted a view, exposing his sexy Dark Hazel eyes. He smiled at me while I was racing my foot to his direction and plopped myself on his side as soon as I reached him. "It's fine. I just calculated the time and I guess it's still early to travel amidst the cold weather," he replied then placed his arm around my shoulders. I smiled at him and leaned my head on his hard chest. 

"Thank you for understanding us always, Barack," I whispered. He rested his chin on my head then pressed his lips lightly on it. "Always, Amore (Love). I love you," he replied, taking a breath and continued, "Promise, we won't take long there. We will go back home as soon as possible to avoid your agony. And after this cold winter season, we will be married and be a complete happy family with the little guy, Ethan." 

I smiled secretly after hearing his words. I was just so lucky to have him in my life. The one who saved me from grief, agony and tough times. He held my hands and pulled me upwards and made me who I am today. 

"Should we change Ethan's surname before or after our wedding?" he suddenly asked. There was a sudden strange feeling inside me that squeezed my heart and entire system. I know Hernandez had died already but it seems so unfair to me if Ethan would use his surname but also unfair on Blake's side if I would change his son's surname to someone's. 

I heaved a deep sigh and lifted a view at him. "Maybe after the wedding?" I answered, unsure. So that, I could still have a time to think for the best. 

He snuggled up his nose and made a cute figure of his pink thin lips. I chucked at him and held his chin. He smirked then took a peck on my forehead. "Alright then, Mrs. Santiolle," he responded between his warm embrace. 

Barack has always been the sweetest man I have met next to my ex-boyfriend. Maybe that was also the reason why I fell for him. We remained in that position for a while until the little man who was racing his foot on the stairs screeched. 

"Mom, I'm ready! Let's go!" I took a glance at him who was now wearing his winter jacket, blue pants and white rubber shoes arrogantly. "Ate Elaine, don't forget my Jersey!" he shouted back on the stairs. I smirked while watching my young man running in our direction. 

I think it's already the time to face my homeland.