Don't Cry, My Darling

The day Ansel Wright returned to the country, I was huddled beside a trash can at the intersection of Wall Street, eating scraps that I had scavenged to fill my stomach.

My legs had been cut off, and I could only prop up my body with my hands. I was disheveled and in rags, and I looked no different from a beggar.

As I looked up at the huge advertising screen at the intersection, I saw that Ansel was being interviewed with his fiancée, Anne Nelson. Over the past two years, Ansel had become a rising star named in Forbes' Rankings.

The air-conditioning in the interview room seemed to be too cold, as Ansel took off his jacket and draped it over Anne.

He did it in a familiar manner, and there was a tender, gentle look in his eyes.

My eyes turned red abruptly, and a lump rose in my throat as tears rolled down my cheeks.

I had always loved wearing dresses. Even on snowy winter days when the temperature was below freezing, I would wear dresses that exposed my bare legs. During those times, Ansel had also taken off his coat and draped it over me fondly.

When the reporter had almost finished with his interview, the host suddenly asked, "Mr. Wright, I hear that you and Ms. Nelson are about to get married. Could you tell us why you got together?"

Ansel smiled and took Anne's hand. "Six years ago, my business failed, and I was heavily in debt. I was at rock bottom in life, and my ex-wife aborted our child after she divorced me. Anne has stayed by me since then, from the toughest times until today.

"Two months from now, I am going to hold a grand wedding for her. Everyone is welcome to attend. I am going to make her the happiest bride!"

People began speculating as soon as he had finished.

"Ansel's ex-wife is so selfish."

"Her husband was deep in debt, and she ran off on her own."

"Now that Ansel is so successful, she must regret it deeply!"

Everyone was criticizing me and calling me a callous, cold-blooded ex-wife.

Many people were also praising Anne, who was Ansel's current fiancée and had remained faithfully with him.

Through the gigantic screen, I could clearly see the hatred in Ansel's eyes.

He seemed to be scorning me and how ruthless and cruel I had been. It almost seemed as if he were saying, "See, you abandoned me back then. Now you should regret it!"

I knew that he wanted nothing more than for me to die right away.

The intense hatred made me tremble all over.

It was December, and snow was falling on Wall Street. I was wearing thin, ragged clothes and trembling with the cold. I was like the little match girl, and it felt like I would freeze to death on the streets at any moment.

The interview ended.

It was time for me to go home.

I propped myself up on the ground with my hands and moved my body. My hands were placed right on top of the ice and snow, and it was so cold that my arms had become numb.

I gritted my teeth and moved step by step. A short, three-mile journey took me three hours.

I lived under the bridge, where many other homeless people were gathered.

A little girl who was about seven or eight years old fell down in front of me. She was about to apologize when she looked up and saw the raised knife scars that criss-crossed my face, and she burst into tears at once from fear.

"Where did you come from, you dirty beggar? Get away!"

The little girl's father picked her up and hurried off.

Before leaving, he kicked me on the back with the muddy sole of his shoe. I lost my balance and fell head-first down the steps.

Warm blood slid out of my nostrils and dripped onto the white snow.

The string on which I wore a lucky charm around my neck broke, and the charm fell to the ground. I crawled over quickly to pick it up, and I gripped it tightly in my hand. Once I found a new string, I would put it back around my neck.

It had been a gift to me from Ansel.

The first year we dated, I had gotten a high fever and pneumonia, and I was in a coma for several days.

Ansel had gone specially to buy me the gift to wish for my safety, in the hopes that I would wake up sooner.

The lucky charm was made of silver and was quite valuable, but I would not sell it even if I starved to death.

It was the only thing that remained as proof of my relationship with Ansel.

I got ready to return to my hole under the bridge for a quick rest. For some reason, I felt very tired. Why did my eyelids feel so heavy?

I had only taken a tumble. Why had I bled so much?

I wiped it away desperately, but for some reason, my forehead and nose kept bleeding.

Both my arms were weak and could no longer prop up my body. I could only lie on the ground as the blood stained it red.

My stomach began to twist painfully, as if someone had driven a knife into it.

My head hurt so much that it felt as if it were about to burst.

I was convulsing with pain.

"Julie! Julie, are you alright?"

Someone was calling my name, but I could not open my mouth or my eyes any longer.

I was probably about to die.

That was good. At least I had managed to see Ansel one last time. I felt reassured to know that he was doing well.

However, dying on the streets like this seemed very undignified.

I was covered with dirt and grime, but well, I was dying.

There wouldn't be much difference whether I were clean or dirty. No one knew me anyway.

It was a good thing Ansel hadn't seen me in such a wretched state.

As night fell, my corpse gradually turned cold, and the snow covered it.