Chapter five

CHAPTER 5

Maverick's POV

"Your Highness, I'm sorry but we couldn't find young Miss Jolene no matter how we search." A man told me when I leaned on the tree smoking cigarettes to get my mind off the thoughts.

The four teams that Father dispatched—which consisted of 7 people each to look for Jolene in different parts of the cliff—finally came back after 3-4 hours to tell me they found no trace of Jolene.

Maybe because I was used to the disappointment all day, I was numbed to the report.

"Your Highness, I found a jacket." A man ran over holding a green jacket. I recognized it as the one Jolene hung when she was in the practice room.

The feelings I've been trying to hold, all unbottle themselves and unite to suppress me. All of it seemed to tighten their hand around my throat.

The hand that held the cigarettes immediately went closer to my mouth

I choose to concentrate on how the cigarettes felt and tasted instead of letting the emotions overwhelm me.

Before I could say a word, another man rushed out holding a shoe, "My team couldn't find her except the shoe." The man explained.

My heart immediately skipped a beat. I knew that the possibility that Jolene is gone was more than the possibility that she was alive, but I just wanted to deepen the search so I would stop feeling guilty and I would tell myself that I did my best whenever my thoughts went back to today.

I wanted to yell at the men to search faster. To put in more work but when I saw all of them panting hard with a tired look, the words I was about to say were swallowed down immediately.

It's useless, isn't it? After all, I knew everything since the last place I was able to perceive her scent was the cliff but I never wanted to say it out because it would make it seem as if I'm a murderer.

But they're different compared to me, they've been on a hectic search for almost today and they've tried to cover everywhere possible.

"Alpha, let's call it off. The search is useless. We'll only tire our men." I said loudly even though my heart was squeezed by pain and I was being eaten repeatedly by guilt because I knew that if it was not for me and my words none of this would have happened. Collin would still have his little sister. The bubbly Jolene would still be alive.

"Everyone teamed up;" My dad shouted after listening to my suggestions. I saw him sigh in relief and pride due to my words.

Perhaps he had that thought in his mind again; Dad always told me that I have the ruthless and kind side an alpha should have and I knew when to extend both or when not to but if he knew what I had done…

"We'd call off the search since it's vividly known that we've lost Jolene." The alpha muttered the 'lost' part with sadness. "Let's go back for the parting ceremony," Father said and left after squeezing my shoulder.

I watched as everyone left with bitter expressions with calmness until Mrs. Lilian and Mr. Conan walked away from the search in sadness. They even appreciated my efforts which made something stab my heart.

Collin slowly walked toward me, he looked calm except for his bloodshot red eyes and clenched fist which revealed that he was far from a calm state. "Thank you, man." Collin's fist bumped me

"It's nothing. She's like a sister to me."  I tried to stay in a steady voice even though I knew it wasn't

 The way everyone kept thanking me even though I was the villain kept breaking my heart

"Are you okay?" I asked Collins and he suddenly kicked the tree in anger. Something he never did since morning. Because we are the only ones left, he dared to show his tantrums now.

"How can I?" Collin retorted in anger. "Jolene is always calm, sensible, and happy so there's no reason why she would suddenly jump down the cliff." He uttered, gritting his teeth with anger.

My heart skipped a beat and I knew that my fear was revealed on my face that split second but Collin may brush it off believing that it was due to care, "What do you mean?" I tried to ask in a steady voice.

"No matter how I think it through, I kept having the belief that someone must have been behind Jolene's death. I swear to Moon Goddess that if it's and I caught whoever did this to Jolene. I would torture that person no matter who they are before I strangle the person to death." Collin said loathfully and stormed away which made all the strength in my body vanish.

Even though Collin is a beta, the hatred and the anger in his tone when he was talking about that someone who dared to hurt his sister sent fear down my spine I can't help wishing that Collin would never find out because once he did, it'd affect many things; my friendship with him, and the pack position.

My heart was a mess and I found myself sitting beside a tree for comfort. I reached out and threw the cigarettes on my lips away since they failed to give comfort.

____

"Do you swear to love the pack and keep it safe as long as you are the alpha…" My father asked me with pride in his tone and I immediately replied calmly, "I do "

Unlike how my father planned for me to be the Alpha within two days, it was shifted again to a week later because of Jolene's death.

Collins refused vehemently to take on the beta's position because he was mourning his sister, but after a lot of begging, he finally agreed to be my beta.

"Did you swear to the Moon Goddess that you shall treat your pack right and with justice, and do you accept to be the alpha of Sharpedges pack…"

"I do."

The ceremony I have always been expecting finally came to an end and the happiness in the pack was overwhelming but I was lost because I became the alpha that I dreamed to be but I lost my Luna.

And now I know how fucked I am because I can't help thinking of Jolene every time.